Erotic Surrender review

The Erotic Surrender book is an excellent source of information for women who are entering the dom/sub or sadomasochistic (SM) world. Varrin approaches all of the facts from the perspective of a person coming into this varied world with no previous experience, and who has a partner that is similarly inexperienced. If you have no idea what you’re getting into, this book was made just for you. If, like myself, you have a little bit of experience and want more, this is still quite useful, though the first two chapters and the introduction won’t apply to you, and you can skip right over them.

She does offer insight into a lot of underrepresented sexual practices, focusing not only on bondage and pain, but sharing information about water sports, body modification (with an emphasis on corset training), and the psychological origins of sadomasochistic fantasies. She shares some very valuable information on exploring your own psyche in order to understand the roots of your fantasies and use those psychological themes to emotionally enhance your SM relationship.

If you’re extensively knowledgeable in the SM or D/S world, this book is NOT for you. While Varrin covers most subjects relevant to submissive women, it does not go very in depth into any one theme. Her primary focus is on spiritual and psychological development through sexual submission, and addresses women who don’t know where to begin. She focuses heavily on the necessity of  “topping from the bottom,” assuming that the reader’s partner is completely inexperienced and must be helped along. If that doesn’t sound like you or your partner, this book won’t be especially helpful.

The book is very well organized, with clear headings and subheadings for each theme she addresses, and Varrin also shares personal anecdotes for some of the forms of SM of which she is particularly fond.

Erotic stories are not the primary focus of the book, however, so don’t buy it looking to get your rocks off on a story. The purpose of this book is to inform and empower the budding submissive who isn’t yet sure whether her fantasies are okay, and how to safely act out those fantasies she wishes to bring to life. She offers a wide variety of suggestions to prepare the body, home, and mind for many sexual events.

The book also features a very handy glossary and index for people that aren’t familiar with certain practices at all, and for those with particular interests who don’t care to read the book cover-to-cover. Overall, I thought this book was a very engaging read and I learned a lot from it.