Remote egg vibe - egg vibrator by PHS International - review by Sinsemilla

I purchased this egg for use in public with the hopes that it would be comfortable, reasonably powerful and quiet. I still own it, but it has remained in my bathroom drawer since I received it.

Regarding comfort, I found this egg to be a little uncomfortable to insert. Whether it was the size - two inches long and a good four inches in circumference, about the same size as a small bottle of nail polish - or the shape - a rounded cylinder with blunt ends - I'm just not sure. It didn't seem to lend itself to being inserted and it took me a little longer than I would have preferred to adjust to having it in me. I think that a more streamlined design would definitely have made this more comfortable to insert and wear overall.

The remote and egg alike are velvet-cote and smooth, in a kind of pasty fuschia shade. It's waterproof, so it's not really necessary to take it apart before washing if you don't feel so inclined. It cleans easily with a toy cleaner of your choice, and I would clean the plastic string for good measure as well as the body of the egg.

In terms of power, I have to call this underwhelming. I wasn't seeking to get all the way to orgasm with this egg, or even close to it, but a little excitement would have been nice. Most of the thrill of this toy came from feeling it turn on and knowing the intent of who held the remote, rather than the actual vibrations. A couple of the patterns were nice, but nothing that really got me going or even made me want much more. It was decently quiet, slightly audible in a quiet room, but I have no complaints on the sound front.

The controls seemed awkward and both myself and the remote-holder lost track of how powerful it was supposed to be set to or how to get back to certain settings. Often he would think he had turned it either on or off, only to ask me and discover nothing had changed despite our close proximity to each other. Related to this, the remote has good range but needs to be positioned correctly in order to make the toy respond, which can really take subtlety out of the equation altogether.

Public use, especially with the need to point it sometimes obviously at the wearer, is made more difficult by the eye-catching design of the remote; it's the same fuschia colour as the egg, and a bit bigger. It stands out in the hand and I'd definitely call it conspicuous. You have a single button to click it on and off, and a button marked F (for Function) that cycles through the various vibration settings. The remote takes a single 23A battery and the egg takes two LR1 N batteries; all three come included and already inside the products.

In the end, although it was a fun experiment, I will definitely be seeking a different remote egg for future play.