Masseur - clitoral vibrator discontinued by Cal Exotics - review by Kayla

The Masseur is a small, waterproof vibrator from California Exotic's Couture line. The bottom half of the vibrator is made from a nice, soft silicone while the top of it does include some plastic. It's about five inches in length and about an inch and a half tall. There are two buttons on the top that control vibrations, and it's a pretty lightweight vibrator as well.

The packaging is nice but simple. It's just a little cardboard box in which the top comes off (like a board game) to reveal the vibrator which sits in a little hole in the cardboard. I was severly disappointed that a pretty vibrator like this would be kept in such ugly packaging. For something that is supposed to be "couture", I expected the packaging to look as such.

The battery door opens up on the bottom half of the vibrator. It's actually a little bit of a pain since it closes so tightly, but it's understandable considering it's a waterproof vibrator. If you have a problem, I suggest a flat-head screwdriver just to pry it open. From there, you just insert your two AAA batteries (not included) and reseal the door. The door is much easier to put back on.

From there, (assuming you didn't put dead batteries in like I did) you can turn on the vibrator. When the vibrator is on, the LED of the buttons will glow red, so in case you couldn't feel it vibrating, I guess that will let you know it's on. The on/off button will turn it on, and from there, you can control the speed/function from with the squiggle-line button. First setting is a low steady vibration, second is a medium steady vibration, third is a high steady vibration, and the last four are functions including medium pulsation and fast pulsation.
The vibrations aren't the quietest thing in the world, but they aren't actually very loud either. You wouldn't be able to hear it through a closed door unless you really were trying.

This is actually the first vibrator where I actually felt like I knew the difference between surface and deep vibrations. This one definitely has surface vibrations - it doesn't resonate very nicely at all. The vibrations are focused on one end of the vibrator (closest to the buttons), and the vibrations can be felt on the other side, but it isn't as powerful.

The vibrations actually were enough for me to get off, and I did, but there was a huge speed bump in the process. The on/off switch was directly where I was trying to hold the darn thing and having it continually turn off made me want to throw it across the room. I tried holding it differently, but then it felt awkward on my anatomy.

When it came to my anatomy, though, I was actually impressed. This vibrator actually did seem to curve very nicely with my body - just like it should. I wish it would have extended an inch or so longer in length, but it did work great at the size it was at.

When I ran it under the showerhead, it didn't get any water in the battery compartment, and when I submerged it in the sink, it seems to have kept all of the water out as well. I'd have to say that the waterproof feature does exactly as it should.

As a regular body massager, it works well. I still prefer my Rub My Duckie as a a body massager compared to this, but it does work well. The vibrations seem too surface-like to really give that deep-muscle massage that vibrations can help with. For a lazy-type of surface massage, though, this works quite well.

To clean it, warm water and some antibacterial soap will do wonders. Make sure you clean it up nicely because it does have a lot of turns, bends, and near-90-degree angles that could hide bacteria if you don't clean it properly. (I went through and cleaned it twice.) If you like lubricating your fun, use water-based lubricant. Silicone reacts with silicone then you have a sad toy, and no one likes that.

Overall, it's not a bad toy, but for being "couture", I think it could have had improvements. Most importantly, finding a locking feature or moving the darn on/off switch. If you enjoy surface vibrations and think your anatomy would match up with it, it's a good choice. For me, though, the on/off switch's position is going to keep this tucked away in a drawer.

If you're curious about the compare/contrast of the Masseur, Better Than Chocolate, and Layaspot, Kaijah posted a great comparison with her review. I'd do it too, but that'd be copying, so just check hers out here.

The Masseur is still a pretty decent vibrator, but it just doesn't work with how I hold my vibrators. When I can't use it without turning it off, it's just not worth the extra effort to attempt to use it when I have other toys that actually work better for me. Other people may hold this toy differently, though, so it might work better for others, but for me, I just don't pull it out anymore after experiencing so much frustration with it.