Free to go Deaf

I'm not trying to look a gift horse in the mouth, but this vibe is insane! And not in a good way! It sounds like a chainsaw cutting through glass! While strong, the Slim Smooth Delight is anything but Delightful. Add that to the finicky battery cage, and I'm done. Because it was free and strong, it'll get 2 out of 5 stars.
Published:
Pros
Strong
Free
Cons
Loud as Hell
Temperamental Base
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review

Use

Ladies and Gentlemen! Do you have a roommate from hell? A nosy neighbor? Or do you just wish to become a social pariah? Well, look no further with the Smooth Slim Delight! Sure, people may think you're a pervert, but who cares? With the Slim, solitude is just one click away! Your roommate will rush out the door! Your neighbor will finally shut her damn blinds! And you? You just need some ear plugs to do it (and 2 AAA batteries).

Okay, perhaps I exaggerate, but if you want people to know you use sex toys, then buy the Slim (I refuse to call it a delight). Labeled as a traditional vibrator, the Slim is made for vaginal stimulation. It can also be used on external areas such as the clitoris, nipples and P-spot (external). The vibe doesn't have a curve, but if you wanted, you could get some g-spot stimulation as well.

Now, technically I'm supposed to say you shouldn't use the Slim for anal play. It lacks a flared base and could get lost in the body. However, if you wanted, you could use it (so long as your cautious) to potentially warm you up for a larger, more properly designed, anal toy. And it would be best to only use the end of it (so it's no where near getting lost) While non porous, I would recommend a condom over the Slim. It's white. Anything and everything you don't want to see will probably show up on it. It wouldn't be the best choice for anal play, but it is technically possible.

The Slim is more for beginners and those who are hard of hearing. I guess senior citizens could rock this vibe. I don't know. I would say there are better toys out there. Advanced users would probably throw this toy at me if I recommended it to them. Beginners, you guys deserve better too.
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • On a bed only
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Clitoris
    • P-spot

Material / Texture

The Slim is made of non porous, food grade plastic with a safety rating of 8. It is latex and phthalate free, making it hypoallergenic compared to other materials. Being plastic, it is smooth and shiny. The only texture in the Slim comes from the shape of the toy. It glides easily and has next to no drag. If anything, a drop of lubricant will make it as silky as you desire.

You can easily see the seams on the toy and where the mold was most likely cut when making it. The very tip of the Slim has a divit. You can easily feel the top with your fingers. If you look in the light you can see some "ripples" radiating from the divit. This is more an anal retentive visual thing and the ripples have no impact on the texture of the toy. The seam has two lines down the tip, where the two halves of the toy were put together. They can be felt, but it's negligible.

The texture of the toy is more geared toward beginners, since the shape causes the texture. More advanced texture-philes will find nothing fascinating with this toy. The slim is solid, and will not bend in any way. This toy is going to stay where you put it.

The slim has no overt odor, film, or taste.
    • No odor
    • Not porous at all

Design / Shape / Size

The shape of the Slim is interesting. The tip reminds me of a long balloon that's only been filled up very little. It has an initial bulge that is shaped like a drop. Then it slims and becomes a cylinder for about an inch. After that it flares out to a circumference a bit wider than the tip. After this bulge, it's a straight, smooth shaft. Here's a picture of it.



The shape is titillating. You can use the bulges to tease the opening of the vagina. The size of the Slim is beginner friendly. It's 6.5 inches long with an insertable length of 5.5 inches. The toy is about 3.5 inches around its widest point. These dimensions are manageable for beginners and for those who prefer more slender toys. Here's it compared to none other than a mechanical pencil.



The Slim doesn't seem intentionally designed for travel, but it's not difficult. It can easily fit in a bag or medium/large purse. It's best to wrap the toy, both for discretion and so the plastic doesn't bang around with other things. It's best to remove the batteries when travelling since the button at the base of the toy could get turned on by accident.

Oh yeah... discretion. You might not get heard at an active airport. Or where there's construction going on. Like listening to loud music during masturbation? Then the Slim is your toy! It clocks in at 4-5 Bees when outside the body and 3-4.5 Bees when used internally (depending on the setting).

Functions / Performance / Controls

The controls on the Slim are straightforward. The base of the toy has a button. It serves as both the ON/OFF and a way to cycle through the patterns. Here are the patterns on the Slim:

1. Low Vibration: 3 Vrooms, 3-4 Bees
2. Medium Vibration: 3-4 Vrooms, 3-4 Bees
3. High Vibration: 4 Vrooms, 4-5 Bees
4. Accelerate - Decelerate: 3-4 Vrooms, 3-4 Bees
5. Pulses: 4 Vrooms, 4 Bees
6. Long Pulse then 3 fast, short pulses: 4 Vrooms, 4 Bees
7. Vibration (why, I don't know): 3-4 Vrooms, 3-4 Bees

This toy is strong. The vibrations are rumbly and travel through the entire toy. If only the motor was quiet!

The one thing (among others) I don't like is that this toy has no emergency off short of untwisting the cap. You have to go through all the settings and hit the button one more time for the toy to turn off. That is too long, especially if you need to shut this thing off quickly. If you have to shut off the Slim in a hurry, your best best is unscrewing the cap.

Speaking of the cap, I have come across what may be a defect. I have to twist the cap on my toy and press it down in such a way so it stays on completely and is able to operate. If I don't press down on the toy, it won't turn all the way in place and won't be able to turn on. It may be just my toy, but I think it is shoddy craftsmanship. The toy isn't waterproof (or isn't advertises as such), so it's not as major, but it is still very annoying. The button can also be a pain to push. It's easier to push it with a nail.

The Slim takes 2 AAA batteries and I have no idea how long the batteries last since I don't dare to use it in my current living situation.
    • Multiple settings
    • Not discreet at all
    • Powerful

Care and Maintenance

Care for the Slim is normal. The toy isn't waterproof, so take care not to get the base of the toy wet. You can use soap and water, toy cleaner, or wipes on this toy. It doesn't collect lint (yay plastic) and is easy to store. Just make sure it is dry before storing. If you want, you can wrap it with a cloth so it doesn't bang around loose. If storing for long periods of time, it's best to remove the batteries from the toy.

The Slim is compatible with both water and silicone based lubricants.

Packaging

My Slim came naked in my order box. Naked. Maybe it was just mine. Usually Eden freebies come in a clear plastic bag or the harder plastic cylinders. There is the brown paper in the order box that probably kept the Slim from sloshing around, but there was not packaging for it. There also didn't seem to be instructions with my Slim either.

I guess you could say the packaging is very "green" and "minimal."

I would say that if you were buying this toy as a gift, you should buy a little drawstring pouch for it. But if you get this as a gift, well, good luck.
    • Minimal

Personal comments

Again, I'm happy Eden gives us all these wonderful freebies. This one was just abysmal to me. It was SOOOOO loud. That order was just a package full of loud toys. I know the free toys aren't going to be orgasmically strong and whisper quiet. I got it. But I also hope that it doesn't come out sounding like a chainsaw. If I came across this as a freebie again, I wouldn't choose it. Not even to give away to a friend. Wet wipes are more useful than this thing.

*NOTE: The product page states that this is a waterproof vibrator. However, there is no O-ring to ensure that water does not leak inside. This vibrator should not be used in the water.*

Experience

One good note: The Slim is a good item to use to teach the scientific method.

I know, the stuff I think of, but really, think about it. Here's the process I went through trying to turn this thing on. I present you: Bonus! The Slim Science Chronicles

Receive Slim. Become excited. Rush to room to test. Acquire AAA batteries from another toy. Reevaluate poor college living. Close up toy and push button. Nothing. Check for correct battery placement. Check. Try it other way just for kicks. Fail.

Perhaps the batteries were dead? Change the batteries to ones fresh out of a package. Try those. Still dead. Try batteries with a different toy. Works. Batteries fine, toy is evil.

It's the toy. Shake the toy. Nothing loose. Look inside. Nothing egregiously out of order. Bang toy against hard surface in frustration. For good measure. Lower Blood pressure. Still Nothing. Look at base of toy, see space, indicating incomplete closure of toy. Screw on. Fail. Try and screw on other way. Fail. Look at threaded pieces and frown. No magic happens. Twist tighter. Press on base like child trying to eat a bottle of pills. Success.
Follow-up commentary
Blah.

I think I threw this out. I sure don't see it in my boxes anymore. I appreciated that it was free and I could try something new. But yeah, not worth it.
This content is the opinion of the submitting contributor and is not endorsed by EdenFantasys.com

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This review was edited by
  • K101 Contributor: K101
  • Rank:
    6.8 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 335
Comments
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  • Contributor: Rossie
    Thank you for sharing such an entertaining review!
  • Contributor: hillys
    Thanks for the great review!
  • Contributor: Beneath The Bed
    Great review and pictures. Thanks!
  • Contributor: UnfgvnGodess
    lol great review!!
  • Contributor: MK434
    Great review!
  • Contributor: RedFreak
    thanx
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