Oversized and underpowered

All buzz and no bite. Not great if you're looking for power, and not worth it if you are buzz sensitive or have trouble gripping things.
Published:
Pros
Easy to clean, Reasonably strong vibrations
Cons
Too big, Really buzzy
Rating by reviewer:
3
extremely useful review

Use

This toy is a big one, and it hasn't become a favorite for me yet. It's big, loud, and doesn't really pack enough punch.

It works best for external simulation, as the rounded tip and sheer size meant I wasn't able to insert it anywhere. For some reason it comes with a pull-cord, so I assume it has gotten stuck up somewhere on someone at least once. You don't want to be that person.

The weight of it is nice, and because of its size, I was even able to use it for non-sex related things. It works great on strained calves.
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Solo
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Anywhere

Material / Texture

It's made of hard white plastic. Somehow, this is then called "Velvet touch," which might convince you if you have never actually touched velvet. It's hard white plastic.
On the plus side, this makes it super easy to clean, and it's durable. I think I've already stood on it once and it is still cranking. No smell to speak of, so we shan't mention it at all.
    • No odor
    • Rigid
    • Smooth

Design / Shape / Size

It's not an inspriring shape, all told. Round, smooth, nothing pointy or ripply. Having a more definite point would have been an improvement.

I thought about using it as a weapon if someone broke in or my housemate kept refusing to do the dishes, and given the bullet's weight, I think it'd do some serious damage.

It's almost too big to hold comfortably, so if you have smaller than average hands, you might have trouble using it.

Also, getting the top screwed on right should not have been as difficult as it was, although I'm not sure if that's the bullet, or me being unco.
    • Beginner

Functions / Performance / Controls

It's the button on the top.

That is, there's one button which controls the three vibe settings, low, medium, high. Click it again to turn off. I'm a power queen, so I pretty much only used the high setting.

Except, for something which promised POWER, this didn't really deliver. It was strong, sure, but not WOW strong. Still took longer to get off than I'd like, given I'm a busy lad with things to do.

Also buzzy. I'd never experienced the buzz problem before, but I found my hand was itching when trying to hold onto it and it detracted from the sexy aspect feeling more vibrations in my hand than my bits.

And noisy - My housemate commented on the amount of noise coming from my room, so it's not something you want to buy if you're looking for discretion.
    • Easy to use
    • Not discreet at all
    • Not enough variety

Care and Maintenance

Soap and water is fine for this one. Take the battery pack out and give it a wash and dry. It's non-porous and can be used with pretty much any lube you want. Really easy care. I store it in a drawer. It's so solid, you don't need to protect it.
    • Easy to clean
    • Easy to store

Packaging

When I got this, I was confused. Why did it need to be shipped in a box that could have fit twelve of the things? Not exactly discreet.

The actual packaging for the toy was pretty useless. No instructions, not suitable for storage, flimsy plastic.
    • Not discreet
    • Recyclable

Personal comments

I was super excited about this toy, but when I discovered that most of its power went into noise rather than making me come, I quickly got tired of it. My quest for the uber-powerful vibe of my dreams continues!
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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This review was edited by
  • HannahPanda Contributor: HannahPanda
  • Rank:
    6.1 / 10
  • Edited reviews: 230
Comments
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  • Contributor: Eva Schwaltz
    Thanks for the review.
  • Contributor: TigerLily9
    thanks bunches for the review!
  • Contributor: Kenneth Fort
    Good review.
  • Contributor: chicmichiw
    Thanks for sharing!
  • Contributor: GingerSpice
    thanks
  • Contributor: Blooddragon
    Nice review!
  • Contributor: marshmallow
    thanks!
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