A lot of people send me links and stories but the one thing I get the most are horrible tattoo pictures. I always think that nothing can shock me anymore and then I open my mail and see that a stranger has sent me a swastika made of penises. (In tattoo form, that is. They didn’t send me a real swastika made of dismembered penises. Because that would be weird.)
I usually save that sort of stuff for my top-ten-weird-things-people-sent-me-this-month post but lately I’ve had so many horrific sexual tattoo submissions that I’m giving the subject it’s own post. A word of caution: these tattoos are probably not entirely safe for work but they will make you feel really good about your tattoos. Unless you see your tattoos here. In which case, you’re probably not going to like this post.
The Top 12 Most Offensive Tattoos (That People Sent Me This Week.)
1. I’m guessing this is supposed to represent “ants in her pants” but it sort of looks like a spider has laid eggs in your butt-crack.
2. Aw. It’s so nice when people memorialize moms in tattoos. Usually.
3. Awesome. You just made Walt Disney cry.
4. I’m not sure this counts as a tattoo, but… nice butt nipples?
5. Vaginas and Religion: The perfect combination.
6. Seriously. Your boob is not a prop.
7. Oh. Just…no.
8. I don’t even know where to start with this one. Oh wait… Yeah, I do. YOU SPELLED “STARING” WRONG.
9. Nothing says “elegant” like “poopsex” in the mouth. This one is amazingly exactly what it sounds like.
10. How can dolphins and unicorns be “erotic”? They can’t. Wait a minute...
11. He’s either terribly honest or he’s well-hung. Apparently you can’t have both.
12. Well, at least it’s direct.
I usually save that sort of stuff for my top-ten-weird-things-people-sent-me-this-month post but lately I’ve had so many horrific sexual tattoo submissions that I’m giving the subject it’s own post. A word of caution: these tattoos are probably not entirely safe for work but they will make you feel really good about your tattoos. Unless you see your tattoos here. In which case, you’re probably not going to like this post.
The Top 12 Most Offensive Tattoos (That People Sent Me This Week.)
1. I’m guessing this is supposed to represent “ants in her pants” but it sort of looks like a spider has laid eggs in your butt-crack.
2. Aw. It’s so nice when people memorialize moms in tattoos. Usually.
3. Awesome. You just made Walt Disney cry.
4. I’m not sure this counts as a tattoo, but… nice butt nipples?
5. Vaginas and Religion: The perfect combination.
6. Seriously. Your boob is not a prop.
7. Oh. Just…no.
8. I don’t even know where to start with this one. Oh wait… Yeah, I do. YOU SPELLED “STARING” WRONG.
9. Nothing says “elegant” like “poopsex” in the mouth. This one is amazingly exactly what it sounds like.
10. How can dolphins and unicorns be “erotic”? They can’t. Wait a minute...
11. He’s either terribly honest or he’s well-hung. Apparently you can’t have both.
12. Well, at least it’s direct.
Just when I think I've seen everything. I see my share of tattoos as a massage therapist. My favorite was the mouth creatively designed to spell "nasty" with a tongue going into his butt crack. Certainly accurate.
#11 is pretty funny
11 cracked me up! Oh man and how about 8.. yeesh!
#7 is just bad bad.
Amazingly horrendous.
#2 is the funniest imo
I believe #10 is a narwhal, not a dolphin.
But, hilarious on all accounts.
Oh dear Goddess number 5's "prayer" had me cracking up.
I loooooove number 11. Let's hope the man is well hung.
O my god that was so funny.
Exhibits 1-12 of why NOT to get a tattoo when drunk.
Hysterical!!! #11 is the certainly the winner.
Staring. classic. I wonder how many people have mentioned to her that he chest says starring. WOW. at least use spell check before you permanantly tattoo something like that on your body. Good grief.
those photos made me laugh and cringe at the same time trying to figure out what they were thinking when getting inked