But I do find it quite entertaining to imagine switching the genders and having the women be disgusted with something the men actually did produce themselves. Let’s try it again with a few changes…
Husband: Wonderful anniversary dear, and thank you for the flowers!
Wife: You’re welcome, darling. But if you could do one thing for me?
Husband: What?
Wife: Try to do something about your man-milk!
Husband: Oh, I ‘d hoped it would be better today.
****
Wife: Oh, no.
Husband: What’s wrong?
Wife: Ew, it’s your jizm again. The desk sergeant at the station makes better jizm than this!
***
Wife: How can such a handsome husband make such bad cock-chowder?
***
Wife: Forget the jizz, Phil. It’s never very good.
Husband: But Marge, I –
Wife: I’ll get some at the plant.
***
Husband: Did you ever see Ellen looking so happy?
Wife: Well honey, happiness is a vacation…from your jizm.
***
Wife: Ugh! This sperm is CRIMINAL. *spits it in the garden*
Husband: Honey! You’ll kill the petunias!
Wife: Then you admit it! Your sperm really IS murder!
***
Wife: Honey, your splooge just doesn’t taste any good.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yep. That’s totally better.
Now join me on the EdenFantasys forum to write your own captions...
Husband: Wonderful anniversary dear, and thank you for the flowers!
Wife: You’re welcome, darling. But if you could do one thing for me?
Husband: What?
Wife: Try to do something about your man-milk!
Husband: Oh, I ‘d hoped it would be better today.
****
Wife: Oh, no.
Husband: What’s wrong?
Wife: Ew, it’s your jizm again. The desk sergeant at the station makes better jizm than this!
***
Wife: How can such a handsome husband make such bad cock-chowder?
***
Wife: Forget the jizz, Phil. It’s never very good.
Husband: But Marge, I –
Wife: I’ll get some at the plant.
***
Husband: Did you ever see Ellen looking so happy?
Wife: Well honey, happiness is a vacation…from your jizm.
***
Wife: Ugh! This sperm is CRIMINAL. *spits it in the garden*
Husband: Honey! You’ll kill the petunias!
Wife: Then you admit it! Your sperm really IS murder!
***
Wife: Honey, your splooge just doesn’t taste any good.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yep. That’s totally better.
Now join me on the EdenFantasys forum to write your own captions...
At the risk of over-sharing: Mine ought to taste a bit like coffee, probably, but no one has ever noticed.
This is f*ing genius!
LOL @Jeff
These things are hilarious!
The woman from the first commercial is Donna Mills who went on to play bad-ass bitch Abby on Knots Landing.
Next time my partner asks me about swallowing I may shout out "Your sperm is MURDER" Just to see what he says.
haha
LOVE it!