That’s how fucked up they are. But still? They are entertaining. Much like this column.

Let’s get started, shall we?


1. The popcorn Kama Sutra.

2. Call me old-fashioned, but I miss the old penis mascot.

3. Well that’s…disconcerting.

4. Sears is moving in a new direction. Apparently.

5. The porn star from “Bang Bus” was arrested in a car he’d filled with goats, roosters, pigeons and a duck. There is no part of that sentence that doesn’t make me shake my head.

6. Foot nipple, y’all. I can’t tell if this would be more (or less) kinky for people with foot fetishes.

7. 15 things that look dirty, but aren’t.

8. Steampunk vibrator. I wouldn’t try that if I were you.

9. Neglected dog takes revenge on naked owner. This might be fake, but I sort of hope it isn’t.

10. Sex puppets. And…mustard. And…murder? Um, you know what? We’re done here. I don’t even have the words…