When I first started coming to EdenFantasys, I looked at toys and made wish lists. As I discovered the forums, I started interacting, although not nearly as often as I do now. I was amazed at how open people were to talk frankly about sex, sex toys and basically any other topic. I had started my own personal blog to open a dialog about these types of things but hadn’t had that happen, so far, so I was thrilled to have a place to share thoughts and get reactions to it. I began to post on various topics and found many like-minded individuals just as interested in sex as I am.
I’ve always thought of myself as a little different from everyone else. I am obsessed with sex, not to the point of distraction at work, but it’s on my mind a lot of the time. I realized that I had a very high sexual drive and just figured that I was one of the few because no one I knew personally had the same type of high drive. Even my friends who talk about sex a lot didn’t have that same strong drive when we’d get in a deeper discussion about. But once I came here, to EF, I found that there were many other people just like me, happy to talk about sex almost all day long. I felt like I had a place to belong now and that I wasn’t some very unique/strange person.
By finding this community and sharing so much about myself sexually, I came across the opportunity to do something that I had always wanted but never had found the right outlet for. I wrote erotica in the past and my wife and the people I shared it with enjoyed it. But it was just that, something that I had shared with a few people and my wife. I felt that I had much more to share in my writing, both with erotica and I wanted to explore some non-fiction topics and my blog just wasn’t the right place to do it. As I got more comfortable in the EF community, I found that EdenCafe and SexIs were accepting submissions from writers within the community. I decided this was the perfect place to begin writing for an audience larger than ten people or so.
I was so nervous about the first article that I submitted, would it be good enough, would it be rejected out of hand, but it was accepted and published a few weeks later. There was such a rush of pride seeing my words in “print” and the interactions I had with people have helped me grow as a writer and a person. I’ve now been writing various pieces for a few months and I still get so excited to sit down and write about something having to do with sex. I’ve talked about all sorts of things, but each is personal and I find that my voice and feelings come through, and the response that comes from that is always overwhelming.
By writing here at EF, I have gained confidence in myself as a writer and now am beginning to submit works to publishing houses, something I never thought that I would have the confidence to do a year ago. I have also found that my relationship has changed because of my writing here at EF and the interactions with community. My wife and I have always been pretty open with each other sexually. We have shared our thoughts and feelings, but because of my interactions with EF, and through the pieces that I have penned, I had the confidence to bring up something I had wanted to try for years with my wife but had never had the confidence to talk to her about it. We sat down and had a long conversation about my interest, and I found that she had the same interests and had been scared to talk about it as well.
She and I went to EF and started reading different articles about BDSM, the topic we had both been scared to broach, and after reading a few, a new dialog began. We talked about more than just what we were considering, brought up things that were in the articles and discussed whether they were things we wanted to try or not. By the time we were ready to actually try this out in the bedroom we both had a good idea of what we wanted and what we didn’t. We’ve now incorporated this into our sex life and I’ve never been more satisfied sexually. Without EF, I don’t think we would have had the confidence to bring this up.
So EF is very important to me, which is amazing since I’ve been in the community for a little less than a year. But now I can’t imagine not being a part of this community, it has helped me open up so much sexually in the past year and I’m excited to see where the next year will take me.