Out in the ’burbs, at least, there is about a zero percent chance of ever seeing porn on a big screen in a theater. But at least we can look forward this coming week to seeing a movie about a fictional porn star. In Elektra Luxx, the title character is a retired and pregnant porn star teaching sex tricks to bored housewives at a community college, and, well, you can take it from there as long as you don’t take it too far.

Electra Luxx has gotten decidedly mediocre reviews so far, but we’ll see it anyway, based on our gut feeling that a comedy about an ex-porn star is going to have at least a few moments that will make it worth the price of admission, plus the fact that any movie that shows “porn people” as “real people” represents some sort of advance in unstigmatizing sexual entertainment.

Besides, we’re amused that the film’s star, Carla Gugino, is offering sex advice as Elektra Luxx; and we’re amused by the trailer.



And so we’ll go and watch … knowing that we will be left wondering, afterwards, why it is just about impossible, at least in the United States, to make a movie about sex that shows any actual sex and get it shown in an actual movie theater.

Meanwhile, the “First Major Motion Picture Made For The Internet” opens today, everywhere, on YouTube. Girl Walks into a Bar is directed by Sebastián Gutiérrez, who coincidentally directed Elektra Luxx. Not porn. This is YouTube, after all. What’s it about? “A dentist teams up with a feisty would-be assassin to put the final touches on the plan to kill his wife. Once he makes a play for the assassin's payment, he unknowingly sets off a chain of events that fuels a cross-town journey through the many lounges, bars, strip clubs and the occasional nudist ping pong club scattered across Los Angeles.”

We’ll watch it for the nudist ping-pong clubs. How about you? And because it’s the Internet, we can offer a Sex Feed first: Here’s the whole movie.