April 28, 2011

When God Created Sex, She Smiled

by Tinamarie Bernard

Sacred female sexuality, with its feelers in earth-based worship, meets resistance in various circles. The idea that woman with all her undulating curves & desires can cohabitate with formal religion creates waves of awe & shock, depending on perspective & historical understanding.

Finding Mystical Truths in a Non-religious Book

Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Human Sexuality (2010), by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá, enhanced my understanding of this artificial split become sex and God with a slap (for its intellectual discourse) and a tickle (for its sharp humor). I’m not sure the authors meant to reinforce any mystical truths about our sacred-sensual natures when they sought to, “show how our promiscuous past haunts our current struggles regarding monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics.” Looking at the circumstantial evidence in our bodies and primitive civilizations, their book nevertheless did just that for me, indirectly at least.

That is because woven between their explanations of why we have sex the way we do are messages of our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity. Beyond that, they demonstrate that it is quite likely modern day sex-angst had little hold on how and when our ancestors coupled. Long before the Church convinced us that our lusts came from Satan, humanity knew free love.

In these more modern times, sexuality’s become pulverized, culturalized, and civilized (some might argue otherwise), women’s especially so, our libidos wrapped up tight in prude little bows, only to discover that we don’t hump like animals at all. Oh no, we are far more carnal than our primate cousins with the exception of the bonobos, who live in a jungle more lush, fragrant, and peaceful than any we’ve built in our concrete labyrinths.

Those sluts. I mean the monkeys. Shame on them, right?

That’s why I’m not surprised about this quiet revolution taking place despite objections like the quote above. In conjunction with the decline of societal, political, organizational and communal structures, we are witnessing the resurrection of the Divine Goddess, and not just in pagan circles. Behind the scenes and in softly hued corners, women especially are learning to reject labels and the price we pay to wear them.

You know exactly the ones I’m referring to: slut, whore, prude and more, terms used to subjugate us for a long, long time. The women doing this aren’t seeking the limelight, although they are easily recognizable by their patina of pleasure and power. And yes, some of them call themselves priestess, and consider all of womankind a sisterhood of goddesses. Rent Tent, anyone?

Ecstatic spirituality encourages us to reclaim the ground between prudishness and promiscuity, that fertile place within our imaginations that understands being naughty isn’t just for bad girls and boys anymore. Our fantasies are the stuff of the soul, whatever that means to each reader, as they are of the body. The sex-positive feminist in me can’t resist sharing a favorite saying: when God created sex, she had a smile on her face.

It’s not just feminine sensuality we’ll be aiding and abetting by reclaiming this sexual-soulful energy; men are wounded by the shackles of shame, inhibition and insecurity too. Think about it. How often have you found yourself taking a bold step towards sensual living — dancing in little else but an obnoxious hat or whispering wantonness behind a pink fan — only to scuttle back in fear?

The Feminine Divine invites us all to show our slips, swivel our hips and let our hair down. She says, go ahead and growl, whimper, and be an example of sumptuous living. In no uncertain terms, find your rapture. Shake your booty and your soul, and imagine all those vibrations spreading like wildfire on the winds of social and personal change, judgment be damned.

Don’t worry, and hum along now: God is watching us, God is watching us, God is watching us…with a smile.