Society » Humor; Relationships » In General; Advice » Sex in General: "A Gentlemen Always Lets The Lady Cum First."

EdenFantasys Store

A Gentlemen Always Lets The Lady Cum First.

A Gentlemen Always Lets The Lady Cum First. Oxford Cleric/Glogster Photo by H. Helmes
  •    
  • Print
  • E-mail
Call it common courtesy. Call it being a gentlemen. Call it whatever you like. If you're allowing your lady to cum first, you, my friend, are a prime example of the refined, exquisite gentlemen of sex etiquette. Alas, many men out there refuse their lady this fine privilege. Hell, some don't even know if their partner has cum. This, my readers, can not go on any longer. Not in the year 2013!!! We outlived the Mayans for Christ sakes! Surely this too shall pass. I hope...

  Don't stop! Talking.

First things first. If you have had sex with your partner numerous times now and things haven't been happening for her in the “O” department, you may have to face a brutal fact. You see, most women can not achieve an orgasm through vaginal stimulation alone. Some may need direct g-spot stimulation. Or others may require some cunnilingus or a vibration on the clitoris. I know to most men this may come off as a direct hit to your manliness or ego, but you seriously need to drop that shit. Hitting it harder or trying to drive it in there deeper is not going to work. Beating yourself up over the size and girth of your penis isn't going to help either. You're simply going to have to face it. Your partner is going to need help. The first step in doing that is communication.

  Stay calm and don't dick out!

If you can't talk to your partner about this, then forget it. You're a lost cause. Seriously. It's another harsh truth but one you're going to have to face. If you seriously can not discuss what happens in the bedroom, after what just happened in the bedroom, then you my friend are SOL! Look at it this way, you just put your penis inside of her vagina. How hard can it be to actually talk to her about her orgasm, or lack thereof. You need to open that door or it may remain shut for years. Trust me, you're talking to a guy with plenty of years of experience. So please, by all means, talk about your sexual relationships. Don't stay quiet. Before you do, there are some rules. Rule one, don't be a dick about it. Nothing closes doors faster. You need to just stay calm and allow her to feel safe to express her concerns. If you take personal offense to what she says, then you, my unlucky friend, just blew it. Rule two, don't be afraid to explore. If she comes back at you with certain desires and fetish that you may find weird or gross, don't chastise her for it. Try to travel down that road of exploration together. Remember, your goal is to have a sexual experience where both parties involved have an orgasm. So if she wants to spank your bottom with a fan belt from a '57 Pontiac, then by all means let her!

  My tool bag is filled with dildos!

You still with me champ? Good. If you have talked to your partner, you should by now have a pretty good idea that there hasn't been many fireworks for her in the bedroom. Hopefully you didn't dick out and throw a fit. Hopefully you didn't say something along the lines of “What?!?! My dick isn't good enough for ya!?!?!” because by now I would hope you have realized that dick size doesn't mean shit to most women. So hopefully you talked about finding a solution. Maybe she has told you what she likes and doesn't like. By the way, women who are reading this, listen up. If we men do something you don't like...please tell us. If you like something done a certain way...please tell us. This is a two way street after all. Anyways, if you have come that far and have discussed what you two would like to do about it, then you are on the right track. Congrats. If she has shown signs in wanting a sex toy in the bedroom, don't panic. Don't lose your cool and get all jealous. Most men do and this is common. Most men see it as a replacement for there dicks. That is not the case. It's merely a tool. I have said this countless times before and it bears repeating. Sex toys are tools of the sexiest god damn kind, guys! Surely you wouldn't change a tire with your dick? Or fix a leaky sink with it? Would you? Jesus, I hope not. You see my point. We all need help sometimes. We need the right tools. Having a few in your bag is not a sign that your dick is broken. It's a sign that you're a guy who knows how to please his partner. A guy who's willing to roll up his sleeves and get down and dirty to get the job done! Sex toys are amazing. Use one and you'll see what I mean.

  A new dawn...

To make a very long story short, my point is this guys. It is not manly or cool or whatever to just hop in and get out. Do me a favor and switch that around in your head. How would you like it if your partner left you high and dry while she went and found a towel? Exactly, now man the fuck up and do what needs to be done. By the way, sex toys aren't the only solution. Like I said, communication is the only way to find what is going to work best for you. I will tell you this though...

The one night that my wife took my hand and taught me how to rub her clit 'til she had an orgasm was the best god damn fucking thing I have ever experienced in our bedroom. PERIOD!!! Let that either be motivation or a launching pad for you. Either way, be the gentleman and let your lady cum first. Why? Because it's pretty hard to concentrate on trying to get an orgasm while “ya know” is rolling down your thigh. Sick as it may be, let that be food for thought. Now go my children and have some orgasm filled sex for once!

Our Top Stories Being Recommended on Facebook

Comments

Love it! Made me laugh. Thanks for writing this

01/18/2013

I friggin love you for writing this!!! Funniest shit I ever read lol. So true though!!!

01/20/2013

Thanks guys, glad you all liked it!

01/21/2013

Lmfaooo this article had me dying of pure laughter lol Great article. I'm showing my friends as we speak lol

01/23/2013

Another great article. You had me laughing, at work again!

01/28/2013

great article

01/30/2013

Lmao....Awesome article

01/30/2013

great GREAT article !!

02/02/2013

Mostly spot on this article, especially about using toys in the bedroom. I'm one of those women that can't come without a vibrator on her clit, however I have to disagree with the beginning. Sex shouldn't be about orgasm. It's about enjoying yourself with your partner and making a connection. I frequently have no need for an orgasm during sex. Just the act itself leaves me fulfilled and you know what? That's okay. If your woman wants an orgasm, then by all means, go for it, but don't forget that making sex about orgasm can add a lot of unnecessary pressure making it far harder to achieve. Things seem to work much better when sex is about enjoyment of both people rather than making sure both get an orgasm.

02/02/2013
sexietime  

I agree, and I couldn't have said it better myself. This was a joy to read, and quiet entertaining.

02/02/2013
Jack M.  

fyi - Mayans still exist.

02/02/2013

great

02/04/2013
Sylvan  

LOVE this article! I should have my guy read this and memorize it!

He has never had the forethought to make me cum or even have me do it myself prior to sex and we both know I'm too shy to initiate it beforehand (a problem I'm working on), so I was always itchy and unsatisfied after sex.

What solved the problem is me using a vibe on my clit while he does me from behind. This works great because the vibe produces a quick orgasm and doesn't require a separate before-or-after-sex session. It also allows me to orgasm during sex which of course is fantastic

03/05/2013
QHRoper  

Amen

05/06/2013

True enough! Love this Man!!!!

08/14/2013

Forum

No discussions yet.

What's Hot

Sexis in your inbox

Keep up on new articles, projects, columns and more