After having kids there is more planning that goes in to having sex than actually having sex. There are a few steps I follow to ensure that it will happen that night. Let me take you through my steps and show you what exactly it takes to be able to either have sex or use toys alone.
I know this sounds crazy but with two kids under 5, having the energy to have sex is not easy. I usually take a nap when my oldest is at preschool and my baby takes a nap. It may only be an hour or so but it helps a lot. If it just so happens to be on a weekend that I would like to do something freaky, I nap when the kids do the day before and I keep them up as much as I can the same day. It sounds easy but it’s far from it.
I am usually the one who gets the kids ready for bed. I try my best to wear them out after being up all day. I then give them warm baths and put them to sleep. Now at this point if you would like to use toys on your own, you could use waterproof toys in the shower or bath. Also you and your partner could shower together and have sex then. It would be killing two birds with one stone.
Now if you have made it thus far, give yourself a pat on the back. I hardly ever make it to having sex in a bed anymore. Usually I get shower sex and crash after I dress. Sex is almost always fun and I almost never have the time. We all know how to have sex but if you have a baby sharing your room it is not as easy as it usually would be. Being quiet isn't the easiest thing in the world to do. So if you are sharing your room with a baby (like myself), you should know a pillow will muffle the sounds and you can be loud without waking the baby. Another option is sex on a couch or anywhere else your heart desires. Get creative. Remember to have fun with your partner and explore new things.
If you have followed these steps and sex with your partner is getting boring you made need to spice things up. The first thing I would try is a sexy outfit. Lingerie is the best to experiment with and also the cheapest. If you have an adventurous partner like I do, toys can be a fun addition to the bedroom. In the world of sex toys there are so many different things to try. There are sexy clothes, all different kinds of toys, sex positioners, all kinds of different BDSM gear and there are all kinds of book and movies to fit everyone’s taste. Many things are available to spice your sex life up. Communication is the key to doing anything new.