Intro to Outer
Often people think having sex means having intercourse. But sex doesn’t have to be procreative: it’s also recreational; and satisfaction doesn’t always require penetration. Anytime intercourse isn’t possible or desired, there are still many good ways to get off with a partner. Several are so good they ought to be part of everyone’s game plan. Variety makes for better sex and the rewards can be mind-bending. Consider these alternatives to intercourse, all forms of what some are calling outercourse.
Getting off together by masturbating is fun. Many couples use it as foreplay but it can be endplay, too. Watching each other generates excitement and increases the pleasure for both. Not only is it an opportunity to show off your do-it-yourself orgasms, it’s a chance to observe and learn each other’s favorite self-pleasuring technique as well. Knowing exactly what pleases another increases your efficiency at giving them maximum enjoyment. Try switching back and forth and imitating one another’s moves. Same sex couples can play follow the leader. Ask if you’re doing it the way your partner likes it. For folks that are shy about revealing the secret act, playing together provides an opportunity to overcome inhibitions and bring closeness to the relationship. Throw in a little dirty talk if it turns you both on.
Lubricants or creams can enhance the pleasures of masturbation. The sloppy sounds of wet hands on wet genitals are a turn-on. Describing to the other person exactly how it feels while they watch you pleasuring yourself, telling them when you’re about to climax, will increase the excitement for you both. Vibrators, dildos, and any other toys used in solo sessions can be used in mutual masturbation as well.
Speaking of mutual masturbation, what about phone sex? When you’re apart, it’s a great way to get off together until you’re together again. Doesn’t have to be miles between you, just separate rooms. Listening to your partner’s heavy breathing and moaning can get you on the road to climax.
Frotting the night away
You might think dry humping is just another form of masturbation, and you’d be right. But dry humping could be the most fun you’ll ever have with clothes on. The technical term is frotting, from the French frotter, to rub. Vigorously rubbing fun parts against each other stimulates and produces orgasms. While it’s usually done while clothed, when nudity might not be possible, such as in public, there’s no law against dry humping naked. Straight couples can do it with the female in the cowgirl position, riding the cock with lips spread to put friction on the clitoris.
Touching releases endorphins No matter how far it goes, a massage relaxes and makes a body feel good. If you give your partner a happy ending, don’t demand immediate reciprocation, though. Let them enjoy the afterglow until they’re ready to do the same for you.
Add scented oil and candles, use gentle but firm pressure alternating with gliding over the skin. Cover the whole body but leave the genitals until last, building excitement and anticipation. A sensual massage can even be the end in itself. It brings a couple closer together and once both have relaxed, they can cuddle and fall asleep in each other’s arms.
Oral, or put your honey where your mouth is
Next to intercourse the most intimate play is oral sex. The built-in lubrication and heat are obvious pros in favor of it. Talented givers of head can drive their partners to a frenzy using a variety of lip, tongue and sucking action. No hard biting, of course, but gentle nibbling can be interesting. Cleanliness is appreciated. It’s no fun to go down on smelly genitals. Begin by bathing together, soaping up and washing down each other’s nether parts can be fun, too. You know it’s been around forever because fellatio and cunnilingus are terms coined by the Romans. For ultimate thrills it’s hard to beat sixty-nine.