A, B, C, D, whack, slap crack...

With an apologetic nod in the direction of Edward Gorey; more apologies to Joseph Bean, Jack Rinella and John Warren for getting the short straws on the “J name draw”; and my tongue firmly lodged in my cheek regarding the word “xerographically;” I offer the following definitions in hope that they educate and amuse.


A is for anal play: referring to things done inside the ass.
Also,
A is for androgyny: when for either gender you may pass.

B is for bondage: all kinds of physical restraint.
Besides,
B is for ball gag: which will silence any complaint.

C is for cock ring: a device used to display the “goods” and prolong the erection.
Concurrently,
C is for collar: a physical symbol of ownership, commitment, and protection.

D is for duct tape: great for many things except skin.
Diversely,
D is for Daddy: referring to orientation not actual kin.

E is for electrical play: ranging from muscle stimulation to light tingling sensation.
Equally,
E is for exhibitionist: who can provoke shock, applause, or humiliation.

F is for flogger: a versatile toy with tails which can both torture and tease.
Further,
F is for fucking machine: a technological wonder or the lazy man’s way to please.

G is for genital play: all kinds of toys used in a wonderful mixture.
Given,
G is for golden showers: think recycled beer if you want the picture.

H is for hair pulling: a sharp tug to punish or steady pressure for desire.
However,
H is for human furniture: such as an ashtray or a footstool to tease and admire.

I is for interrogation scene: role play that ranges from terror to humor.
Incidentally,
I is for intelligence: brains are a turn on, and that’s not just a rumor.

J is for Japanese bondage: which usually refers to the style and not the participants.
Jointly,
J is for Jay Wiseman: a prolific writer who teaches safety and sexual excellence.

K is for knife play: which rarely involves cutting or piercing any flesh.
Knowingly,
K is for kilt: which properly worn keeps everything aired and fresh.

L is for lingerie: sexy outfits which can be fun to wear and still more fun to tear.
Likewise,
L is for leather: a symbol so powerful that to attempt to define it even I wouldn’t dare.

M is for masturbation: on command or at will, all alone or with a date, with toys or by hand, if you haven’t tried it, it’s never too late.
Moreover,
M is for mind fucks: devilishly clever, sick and twisted, those evil pranks played which terrorize and titillate.

N is for needle play: a wonderful experience when done with caution and care.
Nevertheless,
N is for nylons: another functional fetish—fun to wear and tear.

O is for OTK: an old-fashioned over the knee spanking done to punish or to please.
Otherwise,
O is for obedience: a goal that for some is a struggle, while others achieve it with ease.

P is for polyamory: the practice of maintaining multiple, intimate consensual accords.
Plus,
P is for protocols: rules and procedures which provide structure in power exchange relationships, both through deeds and through words.

Q is for quickie: when you want it, need it, and gotta have it.
Quintessentially,
Q is for queer pride: reclaiming the label and finding the fit.

R is for riding crop: a sexy, classic and easy-to-use toy.
Regardless,
R is for rope: another classic which brings me great joy.

S is for Slavette: the author of this strange collection of rhyme and reason.
Similarly,
S is for slut: a compliment to those spreading joy in every season.

T is for tickling: a teasing torment that can lead to trauma or bliss.
Thematically,
T is for transvestite: someone whose clothes go from her closet to his.

U is for uncut: a slang term for an uncircumcised cock.
Unless,
U is for unwashed feet: a fetish named here to educate, not mock.

V is for vampirism: for some a fashion and for others an identity.
Verily,
V is for vibrators: give me a good one and, oh, sweet serenity.

W is for wax: hot dripping and splashing.
While,
W is for wrestling: hot grappling and clashing.

X is for X-rated movies: once shown in theatres and now vintage porn.
Xerographically,
X is for X-frame: a standard in dungeons long before kink was born.

Y is for yardstick: just the thing for a good schoolroom caning.
Yet,
Y is for yoke: a shoulder harness that’s useful for balance training.

Z is for zentai: the Japanese word for a skin-tight suit which covers the full body area.
Zealously,
Z is for zoophilia: a well-known fetish studied and named during the Victorian-era.

From A to Z twice over I went;
Hours pouring over a thesaurus I spent.
I’ll do it again time and inspiration permitting,
But my brain is fried, so for the moment, I’m quitting.
I must end this little vocabulary dissertation,
Since other pressing matters require my consideration.