What's on your agenda today? Us? We're thinking about getting arrested for public masturbation. Maybe we'll throw in a hot pink flotation device.

Wait, we're not that crazy. But this guy might be.

His name's Edwin Tobergta, and he's from Ohio, and 32 years old, and he thinks he's crazy. We might be inclined to agree.

Tobergta was arrested after being discovered masturbating with a pink blow-up pool toy in someone's alley. A witness saw him standing there with his pants around his ankles, thrusting into the toy. The witness yelled down the alley after him, so Tobergta tossed the raft over the fence. When police arrived on the scene, they were able to retrieve the raft.

"Defendant advised officers that he was doing it but only because he has a problem and that he needs help and please don't send him to prison but send him somewhere to get help," the police report reads, and his grandmother told reporters he has a “fascination with plastic.”

However, his pleas, so far, have fallen on deaf ears. Tobergta was booked and placed in Butler County Jail with bail set at $20,000. He has been arrested at least five times for similar offenses, according to police.