Sometimes love is playful. When my husband and I are being playful with each other, we’re most happy and feel the most loved. I suppose a big part of it is because we’re taking the time to show each other attention, and we’re only concentrating on each other.
Making each other laugh and getting that serotonin going without any expectations of anything is really what makes our relationship go ‘round. After all, we’re put on this Earth to lift each other up. That means that, not only should we support our partner, we should be a source of joy to them. They’re a part of us, and we’re a part of them. Making them happy, should make us happy. That, to my husband and myself, is what love is all about.
Playfulness can range all the way from flirty, to goofy, to downright obnoxious. What it comes off as basically depends on the character and mood of the giver and the receiver. My husband’s definition of being playful is very different from my own. That’s because his personality differs so much from mine. Opposites attract, don’t you know?
For the most part, I’m flirty. Hugs are almost always accompanied by groping. It’s just my way of showing I love my husband and that I think he’s sexy. Sometimes, the groping can get out of hand. When I’m in my heat period (Yes, women go into heat. It’s called “hidden estrous”.), I tend to go overboard with being lovey and touchy-feely. When this interferes with work or games, I get punished because I’m being obnoxious.
Then there’s my silly side. I can be very random, spouting off lines from TV and movies, singing bits of themes and songs … It can be fun, but it sort of overloads him sometimes. I also get punished for being too silly. A little silliness can brighten his day. Too much silliness in an “IhadsomuchsugartodayOMGLookitmebounceoffthewalls” sort of silliness can be a wee bit overwhelming for him.
Yes, I get punished for being playful. Sometimes it’s a buzz-kill, but I do tend to go overboard every once in a while, and that needs to be taken care of before I go bonkers. So, the punishment is actually a good thing, and it shows me he loves me because he doesn’t want me to make a fool of myself. Plus, I kind of like some of the punishments … Yes, I go overboard on purpose sometimes just to be punished, but don’t tell him!
My husband’s playfulness is what I would call the typical little boy’s method of flirting. He starts off just by doing little things to catch my attention. This usually makes me smile, laugh, and possibly tell him he’s weird. He can progress into that obnoxious stage of trying to bug the crap out of me just so I’ll look at him, though. That usually turns into tickling and other things. I know he’s just trying to make me laugh and get my attention, but sometimes he tickles me until it’s hard to breathe.
Of course, he has a flirty side, too. I love when he comes up behind me for a hug. Sometimes it’s gentle, and other times it’s a rag doll hug, meaning he swings me all over the place. Neck kisses, my favorite, accompany the gentle hugs. Then there’s the more romantic side of his flirting. Every once in a while, he’ll leave little notes telling me I’m sexy, how wonderful I am, and playful little sayings. I have to admit, I like this better than his little boy-type flirting.
Being playful can also include games. They don’t have to be anything store-bought. Often, the most fun is had with a game that we make up ourselves, and nobody else shares. It’s something special that bonds us further together.
I’m not sure what to call our usual game. It’s just a back and forth sort of thing:
I can never resist groping him after he calls me “sexy”, it always makes him chuckle and smile. It’s just a fun, silly little game; something to show we love each other, and to enjoy together.
You know that punishment I spoke of earlier? That’s sort of a game we play, too. Our relationship tends to transition in and out of Master/Pet mode. I’m the kitty, of course, since I tend to act like one. I get scritchies and rubs when I’m good. If I talk back and try to stand up against Master, I get punished for it. It’s all in fun and games, and it’s never anything too serious. It’s all just troublemaking, nervous giggles, and smirks. Plus, I think he likes to lord some power over me, just as much as I like the comfort and security of being the pet. I know Master loves me and will take care of me no matter what.
So, have some fun with each other. It doesn’t have to come with any expectations, and you don’t need to buy anything; all you need is you. Lifting your partner’s spirits is one of the best things you can do to show them you love them and genuinely care about their feelings. Just because we’re adults, that doesn’t mean we have to stop playing around and having fun. A little laughter and some smiles can really make a world of a difference.