October 26, 2012

Collars and Pets OH MY!

by Mistress M.

I recently spoke with a friend of mine who was having trouble with her "Owner." She's a pet, an actual pet, a Nekko, as it is standard to be called. However, when her Owner started dating a new woman, things around her house changed rather quickly. The relationship that they had has degraded.

The Jan situation

When Andrew is not home, Jan and Patches are sometimes left at the house alone. When you think of how you treat your pet, you treat them with respect. You do not completely ignore their existence, nor do you mistreat them. Jan does both of these things when Andrew is not home. Patches however, is not able to speak up and defend herself in the situation, or verbally show that she is upset. Jan is a manipulator and has caused a lot of trouble in the once peaceful home.

Jan began to push Andrew into having her move into the home. Patches protested, which kept Jan from moving in yet. Jan was angered by this, and then talked Andrew into the fact that because Patches is a human, that she needs to pay rent. Patches understands this and does agree. Since Jan became part of their life, Andrew and Patches have stopped having sexual relations, which has put a lot of unneeded frustrations on Patches.

When you have a pet cat, you love it, spoil it...Cats do as they please just like a woman will. In all honesty, what responsible pet owner would keep someone around who can not respect and treat their pet well? Even more so when they are actually a human? I've personally dumped exes for the way they treated my animals. Patches' fetish is being a cat, so she is a cat within the home.

When Patches tried to communicate the mistreatment by Jan to Andrew, he stated to her, "Well, you wanted to be a pet, right?" Jan has done everything but come out and threaten Patches with, "Either deal with it or get out." Not to mention that Jan has gone as far as to lock Patches in her room, call her nasty names, and order her to sit when Andrew isn't home. When Andrew is home, she will say things such as "Look! Here comes the cute kitty!"

Breaking it all down.

As Patches agrees, she does have every right to pay rent because she is a human. However, since they have established the fact that despite being a Pet/Nekko, she is still a human, is it right for them to deny her actual rights as a human? She is not a slave, nor is she defined to them as a submissive. Jan isn't Patches' owner. She has no right to do any of these things. There is no communication between the two agreeing that Jan is able to control her.

As for the mistreatment, no pet should ever be mistreated. Patches is a pet not a slave, not a submissive. If a good idea of how to treat your pet is by allowing others to mistreat them, it is not right. It is not the communicated contract that was put together when the two became Owner/Pet. The things that Jan has been doing to Patches when Andrew is not around nearly borders on emotional abuse. Patches has the inability to call Jan any names back because she can't speak.

Andrew is also confused on why Patches cannot be happy with simply being his pet. He does not understand why she still wants and needs sex from him. What it boils down to, as previously stated, is that she is still human. I like to think that we here at Eden and SexIs can relate to this issue fairly well. Until Jan came into the picture, Andrew and Patches were sexually involved, and it should not change just because a new girlfriend is in the picture.

Even as a Domme the situation Patches is in makes me sick. There was a non-verbal agreement to how the Pet and Owner relationship was to work. It can be compared to a safeword. When the safeword is used in a BDSM scene, you stop the scene and bring the sub/slave down. In this Pet and Owner situation, you do not violate the terms of the situation and you fix the problem if a violation occurs.

As for Patches, I advised that she record anything that Jan tells her that is verbal abuse. Once she has proof, she can show it to Andrew. Hopefully with the proof, Andrew will realize that you do not treat pets this way, and you certainly don't when that pet is a human either.