Mixing BDSM relationships and mental disorders can be a bit difficult, there is a lot that you have to take into consideration and there also has to be a lot of communication and trust. I have been diagnosed with bipoloar disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, and autism, among a few others, and both me and my partner have to be a bit more aware with the effects that these can cause on our play.

With my bipoloar disorder, we have to be aware more of my manic cycles and whether or not I have been rapid cycling within the last few days if we have a particularly hard scene. My manic cycles can be a bit dangerous as, when I hit one, I not only become unaware of where my limits are, I don't care where my limits are. My own well being is the furthest thing from my mind, and this becomes problematic for us. Through communication with my partner, he has learned to recognize when I'm not in the right state to consent to rough play or when I'm not in the right state to put someone else in a vulnerable position. Since me and my partner have been together so long, he knows where my limits lay and can tell when he is approaching my stopping limit, and though he normally likes to push my limits he won't do it if I am in a manic state. On the reverse of that, is if I am on a down swing. If I am in a depressive cycle, I normally don't feel up to anything more then sleeping so we don't really play during this time. There are times that I have a sub drop after playing and that can lead me to go deeper into a depressive state. My partner has learned that, during this time, I personally prefer to be left alone unless I come to him.

It is important that you talk to your partner so that they know how to handle the situation in a way that is most suitable for you.

The mental disorder that worse effects our play is my post traumatic stress disorder, this has always been the hardest because I can't just play with someone new and even if I've known the person for a long while it takes a few times playing with them to start to feel comfortable enough to let go. I learned a long time ago to be upfront about this, I learned that if I'm going to play with someone relatively new that, not only do I need to tell them I have PTSD but also that, I needed to tell them of any triggers I knew I had. Personally I can't be touched in certain areas or tied in certain ways without freaking out. I also had to tell them signs to look for that tell them that I'm having flashbacks, I would rather them stop and talk to me even if I'm not having a flashback then let them continue while I am having one, as this added to the trauma I already had. When playing with a new play partner, now I have my significant other in the room as he has learned very subtle signs that even I haven't picked up this makes me feel much safer. If I hit a point where I can't stop something, my partner can stop it for me.

Another thing that effects all of this is the medications I take, as it is hard to find the perfect balance for me, my list of medications normally change every few months. This creates a problem in that we have to deal with side effects and we aren't always aware of when, or if, I will have a bad reaction to a medication. I have had medications that have made me hyper manic, my partner had to help me cope with not sleeping for days. I am someone that has what most would consider a 24/7 dynamic, when I have a bad manic episode it affects our daily life and schedule. My schedule is important to me, as it helps me cope better with my autism. When things unexpected take place in some situations it could mess with our dynamic but, instead of letting it, we learn to work with it. I may not be able to sleep or stay completely still but my partner will make me lay down and rest. The worst side effect I have had was a violent reaction, and in this situation my partner didn't get mad at me as he has come to understand with a lot of the medicines I'm apt to bad reactions, I'll feel bad later and he can be upset later but, in the moment, it is about everyone's safety and defusing the situation.