My Husband and I are poly. This means we can (and do!) fall in love, date, and yes fuck, outside of our marriage. With the full knowledge and consent of all involved.

"But!" (you may be asking) "Ms. Mhari! How can you be in love with more than one person? How can you do that to your husband?! Doesn't a new partner replace an old one?"

I'm glad you asked, hypothetical internet person! Introducing Ms. Mhari's Hotel Theory of Poly (tm).

Picture if you will an ever-expanding hotel. There are many rooms, many floors, and many people inside. Each person has their own room with a unique key card. The staff must treat each guest with the same level of courtesy and dignity.

This hotel is the human capacity for love. The more people you love, the more rooms are added. Some rooms have a single bed and are tiny, others are the executive suite. It all depends on how much the person staying in that room has invested in it.

But what about people who break your heart? Who throw it into shambles and leave?

When someone trashes a hotel room and leaves a mess for the staff the whole hotel doesn't collapse. It just means that no one else can stay in that room for a while, and you're more likely to be careful about who you rent rooms to in the future.

What about people who leave and come back?

Their room is still there, it just may need some airing out and cleaning before they can stay there again.

What about people who leave and don't come back?

Their room is still there, but it may be boarded up depending on how badly it was trashed before they left.

What if the one who leaves occupied the whole top floor?

Then the top floor goes dark for a while.

What about the rooms that have been abandoned? Can someone new stay there?

That depends on your own personal hotel. For me? No. Each person who was given a room in my hotel takes their key card with them when they leave, and has a room waiting for them if they come back. My hotel is full of abandoned rooms. But sometimes a long-lost guest shows up and needs a place to stay out of the rain. Their room may not be as well-maintained as the room of a long term guest that's still there, but they've got a place to rest their bags.

Can people change rooms?

Sure! Some guests unexpectedly upgrade their reservation. Husband, for example, started in a single on the ground floor, but slowly he upgraded to the executive suite.

Why a hotel?

I use the hotel visual for ploy because you can have a lot of diverse people all staying in the same hotel. There are a lot of rooms and a lot of options. Monogamy in my mind would be more like a bed and breakfast, limited number of people can stay there, but they get more individual attention.

So there you have it kiddos. Ms. Mhari's Hotel Theory of Poly (tm).