If you go out to the mall or the local bar, wherever you can get a good consensus of people, you will more than likely notice someone who is sexy and someone who is not sexy. Even if you are in a relationship with someone, you will generally recognize someone as being either attractive or unattractive. Don't deny it, you know you look sometimes. Have you ever noticed when you were out with a friend, and a couple of girls or guys walk bye, and you say, "God, that one is sexy. Look at that [insert body part here]," and your friend says "I like the other one better.” What is sexy to you is not sexy to another person, and vice versa. The point is everyone has their own likes and dislikes. We tend to be more attracted to people who fit our own standards of sexiness, and are not attracted to those who fit our standards of hideous. The truth is that everyone is, in fact, sexy.

I learned something very important while working in the adult industry. It is that everyone has their own market. There is someone for any fetish, body shape, size, sex, kink, you name it. Whatever you have, whatever you look like, whatever your talents, someone out there likes you. You are sexy to someone else, regardless of what you may think or someone else may tell you. You will always be sexy to another person even if you are not regarded as sexy by every person.

Now we can easily say that media influences our likes and dislikes. There is a ton of suggestive material virtually everywhere you look. We are constantly bombarded with images of other people that try to influence what the viewers think of as socially acceptable or socially attractive. In virtually any form of media you look at, you will generally see a consistent look in most of the women in media. Fake breasts, nose jobs, and impossibly skinny waists flaunt on nearly every popular television series or commercial break. Now obviously that might not be what you, the reader, thinks is sexy. Or it might. But the women who are shown in media that are portrayed as sexual succubi influence other women to try to be exactly like that, which in turn may persuade some young men to look for a mate who has those same qualities.

When we learn to accept our own bodies, then we can better define sexuality and personal attractiveness. We see images of youth and thinness everywhere we look and expect our own bodies to be like another’s, and then beat ourselves up when it doesn't. Our bodies are currently the way they are supposed to be. We can’t change the width of our hips or the length of our legs. Body image issues such as heavy weight are a health issue, not an acceptance issue. Getting healthy is of course very important, but trying to redesign your body to look like someone else's is pretty futile. There are so many different avenues that we can take to change our looks by going under the knife. Nowadays we can suck out our fat and place it somewhere else to meet someone else’s standards of attraction, rather than our own. Like any surgical procedure, there are risks. Why is it more socially acceptable to risk mutilation or death by undergoing frequent body modifications to meet the current trends of attractiveness than it is to embrace our individual body image? We worry too much about what we look like that we risk permanent damage to look totally unlike natural selves. Once we all learn to accept our own bodies, we can recognize how sexy individuality truly is. The truth is everyone, in fact, is sexy to one person or another, and changing ourselves for other people’s acceptance leaves no room to value ourselves on the inside.