The book you brought is proving less than stimulating, the in-flight film is a quarter-star affair and you have three hours ahead of you. Here’s an idea for something to do to pass the time …

“Cathay Pacific says it has launched a "full investigation" into photos which appear to show a flight attendant performing oral sex on a pilot aboard an aircraft of the Hong Kong carrier,” the AFP reports. In fairness, we have to tell you that an airline spokeswoman said, “There is no evidence whatsoever to suggest that the act took place in-flight, and there are no reasons to believe that any safety breaches have occurred," begging the question of whether you get to be in the Mile High Club if you have sex on a grounded plane, or would that be the Half-Mile High Club or what?

“Full investigation,” we think, means they looked at them a lot.

The Hong Kong media has reported the couple to be a couple and China’s Apple Daily newspaper has a legal letter from the pilot saying that he’d lodged a police report about the pictures, which had been stolen from his computer.

This is the only kind of situation in which “plane” and “going down” in the same sentence are not such a bad thing.