1000 Words by Wicked Pictures - review by gone77

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Is a Porn Movie Worth 1000 Words?

This experimental, half-silent movie suffers from bad acting and standard sex scenes. The bad acting was expected, but the sex scenes should have been more sexy and engaging.
Published:
Pros:
Unique concept
Cons:
Standard sex scenes and typical bad acting
Rating by reviewer:
2
extremely useful review
1000 Words is an experimental film directed by David Stanley. Why is it experimental? Because there is no dialogue. Yes, you read that right--a porn movie with dialogue. Also, it's done mostly in black and white. Except the sex scenes are in color. There's a sort of 1950s vibe to the piece, especially noticeable in the outfits. The music is not standard porno, and has an old school Parisian flavor with a few more modern-sounding pieces thrown in.

Have you heard it said that the best acting is done with the eyes? Well, I think that's what Stanley was trying to achieve with this movie. And, well, he's working with porn actors and they're not known for acting well even when there is dialogue. Thankfully, there are enough sex scenes to balance out the silent bits.

So, what is the story here? Carmen Hart and Randy Spears star as photographers with less than engaging lovers who find themselves attracted to each other. The movie opens with a sex scene between Derrick Pierce and Jessica Lynn. They fuck on a pool table while Randy Spears takes pictures. Next we see Carmen Hart snapping pictures of Gianna Lynn while Hart's boyfriend (Eric Masterson) generally makes himself a nuisance.

We flash forward two weeks and we find ourselves at a photography exhibit. I think it's for Hart's work, but it's not made clear. (FYI, I'm using the actor's real names as their characters are nameless.) Spears makes an appearance. He and Hart lock eyes and gaze longingly at each other while their lovers kiss and nuzzle them. At least, Hart looks a bit like she's longing for Spears. Spears just kinda stares at her. A good actor, he is not.

Spears leaves with his lover (Roxy Jezel) while Hart and Masterson take Gianna Lynn home with them. This quickly turns into a girl-on-girl scene and this time it's Masterson taking the pictures. This evolves into your run-of-the-mill threesome. Meanwhile, Spears and Jezel have their own roll in the hay.

After Masterson and Lynn have fallen asleep, we see Hart sat on the couch with a wistful look on her face. A fantasy sequence begins when she sees a dressed up Spears beckoning her to him. She makes her way to him and goes from fully nude to decked out in a lovely dress. They dance briefly and then Hart wakes to find herself between her threesome companions. A betrayal in the shape of a morning blowjob occurs and Hart finds herself even more estranged from her male lover.

The next scene finds Hart and Masterson in a diner. Masterson is very intent on what he's doing and continually rebuffs the horny and playful Hart. She makes a connection with their male waiter and that leads to a sex scene in the bathroom that climaxes with a rather confusing ending. Hart bumps into Spears outside the bathroom but they are thwarted from doing little more than making eye contact. Again. Don't you worry though, our star-crossed lovers finally meet in person through a cheesetastic twist, and they have their own sex scene.

The bonus features are lackluster, but include a behind-the-scenes featurette, some photo galleries, some stats on three of the female actresses, an extra sex scene courtesy of another Wicked Pictures movie (featuring Hart and Masterson), a trailer for the movie, and two--yes, count them, two--bloopers. And they're not even funny.
Experience
When I first read the synopsis for this movie on the website, I thought it was going to be a completely silent movie and I was intrigued by this idea. However, the sex scenes have groans, moans, and some dirty talk. As I said earlier in my review, porn actors aren't known for their actual acting skill, so I wasn't surprised to see the skill on display here.

The sex scenes are your standard porn scenes: Oral sex followed by a few intercourse positions, and then the money shot. There isn't even one anal sex scene! So, the scenes aren't that exciting; nonetheless they succeeded in arousing me somewhat. Chemistry between the actors? Fairly non-existent.

The cheesetastic twist I mentioned? It totally made me groan and laugh and gives you a glimpse at the sort of budget Stanley was working with. Either that or he thought himself clever. If it was the latter, I didn't find him all that clever.
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • El-Jaro
    Great review!
  • ~LaUr3n~
    A silent movie would intrigue me too, too bad it didn't pan out.
  • ToyTimeTim
    Great review.
    I would watch more porn if they could find 'real' actors.
    Thanks.
  • Kayla
    A silent movie? Really odd for a porno. Great review.
  • TitsMcScandal
    Seems weird, silent porno. Although I'm glad that the sex scenes aren't silent because that would be awkward, porn is very much an auditory thing for me.
  • gone77
    Thanks guys!

    JonsBabydoll - Porn is an auditory thing for me, too, which is why I was so intrigued by this movie.
  • Sammi
    Sounds interesting, in a way
    Great review!
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