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The Presidential Election for the United States is literally tomorrow. Experts are hedging bets that Obama will win and that we won't know who took the win before we head off to bed tomorrow evening. In honor of this glorious (if not so
The Presidential Election for the United States is literally tomorrow. Experts are hedging bets that Obama will win and that we won't know who took the win before we head off to bed tomorrow evening. In honor of this glorious (if not so glamorous) process, we've put together a list of our own version of the Bill of Rights. We will be posting one new "Bill of Right" each day for the next two weeks and we'd love to hear your thoughts on all of them! First up:You Have the Right to Renegotiate Your Relationship.Feeling like you never get your way or feeling taken for granted is a great way to build a huge mound of resentment in a relationship. The little things that didn't matter in the beginning now seem like neon blinking signs telling you to pack up the pets and the kids (if you have them) and get the hell out of Dodge. It's a lot easier to give up than it is to confront the issues. But, giving up on things hardly ever proves to be the right path.How would you go about negotiating your relationship terms; be it monogamy vs. polyamory vs. swinging, housework, ideals and beliefs? Is this something you already do? Maybe you do and it comes so naturally within the relationship, you don't always see it? Tell us about it! Is it a good idea to treat your relationship like an at-will contract (at-will meaning either party can end the relationship at any time and/or negotiate new terms)?
Contracts are an excellent idea, imho. Personally, I plan to put one into effect in my next relationship.
It is my opinion, based on observation and common sense, that contracts prevent a LOT of miscommunication, misunderstandings, breakups, heartaches, and pain. This seems to result from not knowing what one's partner's expectations are -- both of the other party and the relationship in general.
In my humble opinion, contracts are a necessary communication tool to use in defining the "rules" and expectations of relationships. I truly believe that if all couples did this in one form or another - however informal or formal - that there would be a lot less breakups, divorces, unhappy relationships, lying, cheating, etc.
Defining what's expected of both parties and what's "allowed" in the relationship from the get-go allows for clearer communication, more understanding, less cheating/lying, less breakups and divorces, and so on and so forth.
Also, while contracts are especially important in many BDSM/D&s/kink relationships, I wholeheartedly believe contracts can be incredibly useful in any relationship - even the most vanilla of couples.
In closing, I give contracts two thumbs up and five stars.