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I was in a similar situation. I had been with a woman once, but I was still quite curious about those instincts/desires as I dated men. I ended up in a relationship with a wonderful guy that lasted 5 years. We thought we were going to marry each other. But eventually, as you suggested you fear, the thought that I could go through my life without really exploring that other side of my sexuality caused me so much grief that I had to end it. It felt unfair to him to continue mulling over this while I was apparently "committed to him". Breaking things off with him was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I loved him so very deeply, and I still do to this day, but I feared I would cause him and us harm in the long run by denying my feelings (or the possibility of those feelings) for women. Things between us 6 months later are still strained, but I'm hoping time will heal things.
Originally posted by
LikeSunshineDust
Ok, so I figured out I was bi about 7 or 8 years ago, and since then I've still only dated guys. It's just been a matter of there have only been guys available to date. I'm now in a very serious relationship with a guy, and I don't
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Ok, so I figured out I was bi about 7 or 8 years ago, and since then I've still only dated guys. It's just been a matter of there have only been guys available to date. I'm now in a very serious relationship with a guy, and I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I really see myself with him for a very long time, if not forever.
I've still never been with a woman, and it's starting to eat away at me a little. Like, I've started to avoid hanging out with one of my best friends because she's gay and I get jealous of her and her experiences. My boyfriend and I have talked about a threesome, though I honestly don't think it'll happen, but I wouldn't want my first experience with a girl to involve him anyway (no offense to him). At the same time, if he let me go off and experiment on my own (I don't think he'd do that), I can't say that I wouldn't get emotionally involved with some woman. Though maybe that's what I'm really craving, a real relationship with a woman.
God, I'm so torn. I'm so madly in love with my man, and I would never want to be without him. But there's this whole other part of me that I've never gotten to experience. In a recent discussion I started, someone advised me not to suppress my fantasies because I'll end up wandering off to find them. I'm afraid of this here. I just feel really lost and need some advice. less
I've still never been with a woman, and it's starting to eat away at me a little. Like, I've started to avoid hanging out with one of my best friends because she's gay and I get jealous of her and her experiences. My boyfriend and I have talked about a threesome, though I honestly don't think it'll happen, but I wouldn't want my first experience with a girl to involve him anyway (no offense to him). At the same time, if he let me go off and experiment on my own (I don't think he'd do that), I can't say that I wouldn't get emotionally involved with some woman. Though maybe that's what I'm really craving, a real relationship with a woman.
God, I'm so torn. I'm so madly in love with my man, and I would never want to be without him. But there's this whole other part of me that I've never gotten to experience. In a recent discussion I started, someone advised me not to suppress my fantasies because I'll end up wandering off to find them. I'm afraid of this here. I just feel really lost and need some advice. less
Now I'm in a wonderful relationship with a very lovely lady. When I look back on that time, I realize that I made 100% the right decision. My feelings for women weren't just curiosity, nor was the desire sated by this relationship. I feel now that I've opened up a whole new world that I really enjoy... one that I never would have known much about had I not taken that leap.
Who knows if I'll end up with a man or a woman. I don't particularly care, as long we love and respect eachother. But that's just me.
