Sex and dysphoria

GONE! GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on how bad it is, how about you? Vote on whatever is applicable.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Sexual activity with a partner makes me feel better.
26
Sexual activity with a partner makes me feel worse.
13
Sexual activity with a partner doesn't make me feel any different.
6
Solo sexual activity makes me feel better.
16
Solo sexual activity makes me feel worse.
17
Solo sexual activity doesn't make me feel any different.
13
This is true no matter what the intensity.
13
This is only true if it's really mild.
4
This is only true if it's really severe.
3
I don't engage in sexual activity with a partner ever.
8
I don't even know what dysphoria is!
3
Total votes: 122 (56 voters)
Poll is closed
02/29/2012
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butts butts
My dysphoria was much worse before my partner and I got together. I don't care about my physical sex as much because of him. I still experience dysphoria, but it's not as bad or frequent.
02/29/2012
DreamWolf DreamWolf
Amazing and important topic in my opinion!

Well, with my Master of course am all filled with satisfaction and happiness, especially because of the emotional fulfillment, though of course when it doesn't come out so good like expected (aka when I don't reach the desired pleasure peak) then I often get all depressed and growly and sad and meh...

By myself I tend more to feel depressed, simply because of feeling lonely, that I can't rely on Him (like how it is supposed to be done when you live with your precious one), and there is only me for my pleasure... It doesn't mean of course that I am always depressed whenever I am by myself, whether after being with my Master of because of not being with Him, but it can happen quite often sometimes - so to me toys are more worth it when they are used with Him, and even then sometimes I feel like "an aid is used as if things didn't work, ridiculous" - but blissfully He is more enthusiastic and uses them on me to increase O/our P/pleasure, not only to have me enjoy them so He wouldn't have to put as much effort into it... That happens too though, but I still find it better to use toys and enjoy His Company at least, than not enjoying It at all because I take too long to catch up with Him... Meh... ~smiles laying ears blushy
02/29/2012
thePicklez thePicklez
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
I think my worsened dysphoria for solo will change once I get a packer/strap-on of some sort. When I feel like masturbating and there's nothing there to grab, I definitely feel more upset about it all.
03/01/2012
MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
Being wanted and loved, no matter how I look, is a huge thing for me, so I prefer sex with a partner. I don't get it a lot, though, because I have a far higher sex drive than my partner. I can still enjoy masturbation, thankfully.
03/02/2012
GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by butts
My dysphoria was much worse before my partner and I got together. I don't care about my physical sex as much because of him. I still experience dysphoria, but it's not as bad or frequent.
Same here. I feel like getting positive reinforcement and respect for my body as it is has helped a lot to combat the negative messages I give myself. Like, instead of looking down and thinking "Eww my chest is gross and wrong" I might think "Well my partner doesn't hate it so it's not the end of the world."
03/02/2012
Alx Alx
when I had a casual sex partner, I'd feel awkward whenever we had sex. he was very respectful though and didn't mind me keeping my shirt and binder on for obvious reasons. I never got anything from having sex though, so I've yet to experience pleasurable sex per se. solo is a little 50/50; sometimes it worsens my dysphoria, other times it makes me feel better. I've been on T for little over a year, so it's always nice to figure out I've grown a little since last time.
03/06/2012
Pirate Pirate
i have a hard time with solo sex, but as soon as my bf is there, i don't mind anymore. i guess trusting your partner helps a lot with dysphoria
03/06/2012
transboy transboy
I'm single and have never had a partner (both before and since transitioning), but ever since starting hormones I fell much more comfortable with masturbation. I'm pretty sure that I'd feel rather awkward (i.e. dysphoric) having sex with someone though, for at least the first few times.
03/07/2012
DreamWolf DreamWolf
Quote:
Originally posted by DreamWolf
Amazing and important topic in my opinion!

Well, with my Master of course am all filled with satisfaction and happiness, especially because of the emotional fulfillment, though of course when it doesn't come out so good like expected (aka ... More
Oh btw, I would like to add that I am not anything what you could call trans (neither my Master), but the discussed topic still plays a big part in my life with Him, simply because of frustrations and a billion other things - so I just thought that I should drop a comment in as someone who isn't directly invited into the discussion but is involved in some way too... Hoping that it would add to the very helpful conversation... ~lays ears blushy
03/08/2012
Interesante Interesante
I don't really have sex with partners much. The last time I tried it, it left me feeling reeeeallly bad for quite a long time. Right now I'm taking a break from that because I don't want to deal with it again. That was before I realized I was trans, however...
03/09/2012
Antipova Antipova
Why no option for "I know what dysphoria is (or at least I know of it), but I don't experience it" ? Anyway, that's my camp.
03/10/2012
xxjoel xxjoel
When I can get over my dysphoria well enough to have it, sex helps WONDERS. It's like my body is finally doing something I appreciate!

When I can't get over my dysphoria to have sex, I usually curl up in my bed and cry.
03/16/2012
GONE! GONE!
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Why no option for "I know what dysphoria is (or at least I know of it), but I don't experience it" ? Anyway, that's my camp.
Because I forgot to add it and didn't notice until now. Oops.
03/16/2012
eroticmutt eroticmutt
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
Personally, I usually feel the same during/after masturbation.

Being with a partner makes me feel better IF they're not paying unwanted attention to certain features about me that make me especially dysphoric (ie breasts and hips). If they're focused on anything else it improves my mood and emotional state.
03/16/2012
nori nori
I'm not on the queer spectrum, but I do feel shitty about my body sometimes. (I know it's not the same thing!)

But I tend to avoid sexuality at all costs when my head enters that dark place.
07/11/2012
Charry Charry
Sexual activity only makes me feel worse if my born sex features are being used.
07/11/2012
thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
It really depends - if I'm feeling intensely dysphoric, I usually hate being touched, as it reminds me what my body is like, but if I'm calm enough to get cuddled and kissed a bit that can help sometimes. If the dysphoria is more mild, then sex can help, since I have partners who are so good about reaffirming by gender identity. I try not to push myself to have sex in those situations, though. I have done so in the past and regretted it - I would like to keep the number of times that I have awkward, tearful, "this chest binder is untouchable armor" sort of sex to a minimum.
07/12/2012
Phosphorous Tick Phosphorous Tick
If i'm already feeling terrible I generally won't let her touch me since it just makes it worse. However she does have a knack for making me feel better about myself and my body not sure how she manages to do it.
Different motions have different effects as well, same with what I'm wearing at the time.
07/12/2012
TheirPet TheirPet
I usually feel better when my partner has contact with me. I don't know why but I'm thankful for it.
07/12/2012
sodapin sodapin
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
I'm just dysphoric all around lately :\ I've never tried anything with a partner, but I can't imagine it going well considering I'm not out to anyone and I probably won't have the "equipment" downstairs my partner expects xD.
07/12/2012
xxjoel xxjoel
I've gotta be careful about it, certainly.
08/09/2012
GenderSexplorations GenderSexplorations
I can't do self-stimulation. I just... can't. But being able to put on my sex-cock (as opposed to my packing-cock) and have sex with my boyfriend definitely makes me feel better.
08/09/2012
digit88 digit88
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
partner
08/11/2012
Missmarc Missmarc
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
Sexual activity with a partner makes me feel better.
08/11/2012
TheParrishism TheParrishism
If I am feeling dysphoric, sex is just not going to happen. So its not an issue really because it just doesn't happen. What does bother me is that, if I am upset, but my partner isn't. If my partner is in the mood, but I am unable to assist, so to speak, I feel even more upset. It becomes an issue of being inadequate in my body as well as unable to satisfy my partner.
08/13/2012
icelandia icelandia
Quote:
Originally posted by TheParrishism
If I am feeling dysphoric, sex is just not going to happen. So its not an issue really because it just doesn't happen. What does bother me is that, if I am upset, but my partner isn't. If my partner is in the mood, but I am unable to assist, ... More
This. Exactly this.
08/14/2012
alextge alextge
Quote:
Originally posted by GONE!
If you're trans and/or experience body dysphoria, how do you feel about sexual activity (Masturbation included.) during the times when you do? I'm really curious about this. I know it makes me feel better usually to do something depending on ... More
Almost all sexual stuff makes me hyper aware of any dysphoria I do have, so it really depends on how I'm feeling at the time. It either boosts the confidence I do have, or makes the insecurity worse
05/11/2013
needapacker needapacker
Anything sexual makes me dysphoric but sometimes the pleasure outweighs it and im fine. other times i have a panic attack and smoke half a pack of cigarettes in one sitting.

And also, if you clicked the last choice, you do not belong in this section.
05/13/2013
needapacker needapacker
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Why no option for "I know what dysphoria is (or at least I know of it), but I don't experience it" ? Anyway, that's my camp.
Then you probably don't belong in the trans section.
05/14/2013
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