Most Embarrassing...

Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
SexIs staff and contributors shared theirs. What's your most embarrassing sexual moment?
07/10/2009
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Liz Liz
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
SexIs staff and contributors shared theirs. What's your most embarrassing sexual moment?
I was in high school, hooking up with my boyfriend while my parents were out of the house. We decided it would be a good time to incorporate whipped cream into our relationship, and we were just getting into it when I heard the front door open.

I jumped out of bed and tried to make a run for it, but I wasn't fast enough: I ran into the hallway only to bump into my mother and my 75-year-old great aunt.

I was half naked, one breast was still partially creamed, and I had my shirt in one hand and the can of whipped cream in the other.
07/10/2009
Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz
I was in high school, hooking up with my boyfriend while my parents were out of the house. We decided it would be a good time to incorporate whipped cream into our relationship, and we were just getting into it when I heard the front door ... More
That made me scream with laughter.

So... does your mom ever bring it up?
07/10/2009
NuMe NuMe
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
That made me scream with laughter.

So... does your mom ever bring it up?
I was wondering that too.
07/10/2009
Liz Liz
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
That made me scream with laughter.

So... does your mom ever bring it up?
I got a horrified stare in the moment, followed by her quickly shooing me to the bathroom before my great aunt could grasp what was going on, but my mom didn't mention it again. I brought it up a few years ago, and she told me that for months after the incident, she cracked up every time anyone offered her whipped cream on anything. Fortunately for my sex life, my mom has a good sense of humor.
07/10/2009
TinyTease TinyTease
Quote:
Originally posted by Liz
I got a horrified stare in the moment, followed by her quickly shooing me to the bathroom before my great aunt could grasp what was going on, but my mom didn't mention it again. I brought it up a few years ago, and she told me that for months ... More
Too awesome. You have a very cool mom. I don't really have any stories like that...is that a good or a bad thing? lol
07/10/2009
Mamastoys Mamastoys
Quote:
Originally posted by TinyTease
Too awesome. You have a very cool mom. I don't really have any stories like that...is that a good or a bad thing? lol
I don't either as far as I can remember..
07/11/2009
Erachten Erachten
Not embarressing, but funny at the time. Me and my wife, at the time fiance, were folling around and we left the tv on. We were just doing some heavy foreplay and we were getting into it. Right as things were getting pretty heavy we hear from the tv, from Family Guy "Little John?....Little John?........Little John?" "DAMMIT! Can't a guy masturbate around here!" and we were both no good. we finished up but we never really did stop laughing.
07/17/2009
LilyLust LilyLust
My very first time, I was so nervous. After a little fore play we got going and SURPRISE!! I got my period. I was so embarrassed I got dressed and ran home. Granted I was very young. And things like that don;t really bother me anymore. But never the less.

Then after I got engaged to my now husband we are do move my sick mother in with us. Well we were really going at it, and next thing I know she's nocking on the door "I'm trying to sleep you know!" I couldn't look her in the eyes for a week.
07/24/2009
Darling Dove Darling Dove
Most embarrassing for me was when I did not know my grandmother came home and was upstairs. We were going at it (quietly) and she muted the tv and TRIED to listen (she does it when I am on the phone and such too, as I have mentioned they are horrid snoops... I regret living here for schooling) and I got in huge trouble for it. I couldn't have anyone over for weeks. Ever since then whenever my partner is over we get attacked with lectures and such, so much so that it becomes too awkward for us to look at each other at some points.

Ahh family.
08/26/2009
Jonathan Buffard Jonathan Buffard
My stories aren´t all that embarassing, but I think that this post I just read on Fmylife.com is worth sharing: (FML stands for f*ck my life)

"Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML"
08/26/2009
Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
I was eating my girlfriend out and I sneezed in her snatch. Awkwaaaard.
08/26/2009
spicywife spicywife
This has probably happened to a ton of people (right?!). I sent a very explicit and sexual message to a family member on accident. *sigh* very embarrassing! It was in an instant messaging program and I simply clicked on their name on accident. That was many years ago before I was married and I was dating a guy that the message was intended for but it still sticks with me because I was so embarrassed.
08/26/2009
Gary Gary
This isn't really embarrassing, but it kind of fits in here...

Before I met Victoria I was living in this warehouse in South Philly with my cats. This one time I had a day off, and I slept in really late. Also relevant to the story, I had a 5 disc DVD changer. There would always be a CD or 2, & a porn DVD or 2 in it at all times.

On this particular morning I woke up in my pitch black room, realized I felt good, well rested, and had the day off. So I decided to start my day off by watching some porn. I reached over to where the remote was, picked it up, and then immediately realized that my hand was wet. While I was sleeping, one of my cats threw up all over the remote. What a buzzkill!
11/03/2009
El-Jaro El-Jaro
Burped Hungry Howie's garlic crust into someone's mouth while making out...

My mom swung by at an old place I was renting and didn't announce when she walked in. My partner at the time and I were going at it LOUD. She never brought it up afterwords.

Almost bad: Same ex as above got me a hamster one year for VD (gawd i hated that damn rat). I had to chase it around my rental place and got it back in its cage 5 mins before my roommate got back.

First time getting head to completion with my current gf got it right up her nose.
11/03/2009
J's Alley J's Alley
Ok, I have some just crazy funny stories, but my favorite (and my exes) is:

While hooking up in a school parking lot they locked the gates and there was no way out. We had to call his best friend and cut the lock off with bolt cutters.
11/03/2009
Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
When we first started buying sex toys we weren't that careful about hiding them - then we stated finding them where they didn't belong - seems some kids in the neighborhood were also in on the story!

So needless to say we were much more careful going forward!

They're in college now - so I just have them all in a dresser drawer - I suppose if they really want to borrow them - I don't object!
11/03/2009
Miss Jane Miss Jane
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
I was eating my girlfriend out and I sneezed in her snatch. Awkwaaaard.
That made me laugh.. and then I felt bad But I know how you feel.. sometimes you just have the urge to sneeze at the oddest times, and I'm pretty sure I've almost sneezed on my boyfriend's junk..
11/04/2009
Miss Jane Miss Jane
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
Burped Hungry Howie's garlic crust into someone's mouth while making out...

My mom swung by at an old place I was renting and didn't announce when she walked in. My partner at the time and I were going at it LOUD. She never brought ... More
..I like their pizza, but they don't have a chain where I live for college.
11/04/2009
El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Jane
..I like their pizza, but they don't have a chain where I live for college.
oh it's good pizza...I don't know about getting it 2nd hand though...
11/05/2009
Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Jonathan Buffard
My stories aren´t all that embarassing, but I think that this post I just read on Fmylife.com is worth sharing: (FML stands for f*ck my life)

"Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I ... More
My favorite FML that I saw was the following:

"Today I discovered that my father keeps his Viagra in an Advil container in the bathroom. Now I have a splitting headache and a raging hard-on. FML"
04/02/2010
Kim! Kim!
I was 18 or 19 at the time and staying in a hotel with my then-(long-distance) boyfriend and his parents. A couple of nights of sharing a bed together...a few feet away from them. Yeah, like hell we weren't going to sneak some sex in somewhere. I was going to school over 10 hours away from him and we were horny kids and hadn't seen each other in awhile.

So we went down the pool and everything started out innocently enough, just a bit of PDA, not full-on make out sessions or anything. We were totally alone. Then we took it to the hot tub and things heated up a tiny bit. The security guard came by to lock up and told us to make sure we didn't leave anything behind, he was locking the door behind him and we wouldn't be able to get back in until morning. Perfect. Or at least we thought it was perfect. We got down to business shortly thereafter and things were awesome. We finished up and were getting ready to head back to the room when we saw it. The security camera aimed directly at the hot tub. Yes, we had totally just performed for probably every guard in the hotel that evening. No wonder he let us stay in there after locking up.
06/08/2010
Blinker Blinker
After I had my first full anal sex session, I let out about a 45 second fart. This made my boyfriend and I laugh, which just apparently triggered a bombastic stream of farting. Every move I made, I farted. I breathed, and farted. The whole thing lasted a good 7 minutes with my ass in the air but I've never laughed so hard in my life! This was only within the first month of our dating each other, and I decided if he could put up with THAT, he could put up with anything. I realized he was the man of my dreams...via a farting session.
06/29/2010
Jul!a Jul!a
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
After I had my first full anal sex session, I let out about a 45 second fart. This made my boyfriend and I laugh, which just apparently triggered a bombastic stream of farting. Every move I made, I farted. I breathed, and farted. The whole thing ... More
My fiance laughs when I get the vag farts after I orgasm. I can keep those going for a good long time, and he just sits there shaking his head at me and laughing, lol
06/29/2010
Hollywood Chic Hollywood Chic
In short, the police were called by the neighbor because she thought there was a woman being hurt/harmed; after my screaming orgasm. Of course, this was not told to me until i opened the door to great the officer (my uncle) wearing a very short silk robe with that after sex glow.
07/05/2010
Alicia Alicia
With my ex we were at a party and it was an inside joke type thing with us that if we said we had to "find his wallet" it meant we were going to go find an empty bedroom to hook up in. Noone had ever tried to help find it and we thought they all kind of knew what it meant. Well, at one party someone did not know and the host of the party went upstairs and found us in his bedroom, he told us to GTFO and use his sister's room as well. Unfortunately he also told everyone else at the party and they all came upstairs, picked the lock and stormed into the room. It was about three of my ex's guy friends, his ex girlfriend and some other girl. He threw me off the bed so that they wouldn't see me naked and I ended up knocking over the top of a papasan table that fell on my head and then a floor lamp came tumbling down after. I got a black eye from it and a very sore back.

With my husband not too much embarrassing has happened except at our first place the neighbor had known my husband for years because his house used to be his house wiht his father. So, we talked sometimes when we were outside. The neighbor commented on how we were so quiet and how he would think with a new couple he'd get to hear lots of drama and fights. Well, just then his son starts laughing his head off and says "yea right they're quiet! you should try having a bedroom window right near theirs!" After that everytime we had sex we couldn't help but think about the teenage kid whose bedroom window was only about 10 feet from ours and how he was probably listening in.
07/05/2010
svalentine;) svalentine;)
not so much embarassing now but when i first got with my husband and we started having sex one time i queefed really loud. at the time i was mortified..lol
07/24/2012
nova2014 nova2014
My boyfriend and I were having sex once in the car at a parking garage and afterwards he decides it's a great idea to throw the condom over the railing.......it hit a guy when it landed..it was so embarrassing..
12/03/2012
MrWill MrWill
My mom has walked in on me with a gf at several points. She usually just closes the door and walks out.

The embarrassing part is when she mentions it to my Dad and he walks up to the door and starts dry humping it or making horrible noises. I usually end up laughing so much I lose it.
12/03/2012
libbyv libbyv
Quote:
Originally posted by Blinker
After I had my first full anal sex session, I let out about a 45 second fart. This made my boyfriend and I laugh, which just apparently triggered a bombastic stream of farting. Every move I made, I farted. I breathed, and farted. The whole thing ... More
funny
01/01/2013
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