Ha! Somebody, share that informational video with me, please
I get SO shy when it comes to talking that it's ridiculous. I have no problem taking charge but ask me to talk dirty or tell you what I want.... (cringe)...I would rather watch a house full of screaming kids (and that's not going to happen lol).
I believe feeling comfortable is key. Probably starting out simple is good. And, if you want the dirty talk, you probably need to be able to ask for it
I think what would help me out would be simple questions. My partner asking me to tell him how "this feels", "do you like it when I touch you like this", etc. That might be a good warm up and ice breaker until that comfort level is there.