My pleaser

Triple stimulation vibrator by

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Non-Pleaser

The My Pleaser is a moderately powerful, moderately sized triple-action stimulator. It's pretty, with it's gem-like purple exterior, but when push comes to shove...it doesn't perform as intended.
Published:
Pros:
Simple push-button controls, may be used anally.
Cons:
Completely ineffective as a triple stimulator, difficult to clean, cannot be sterilized.
Rating by reviewer:
1
extremely useful review

Use

The My Pleaser is (supposedly) a triple stimulation vibrator intended to provide anal, vaginal, and clitoral stimulation. Sadly, the only part of that trifecta that it actually delivers is the vaginal portion. If, that is, you can tolerate its short stubby arms stimulating NOT your anus or your clitoris...but your perineum and your urethra instead.

For whom will this toy actually work? Someone whose anus, vagina, and clitoris are in unusually close quarters to one another. That is the only way those little arms will reach their intended targets.

I did also try the toy anally. It is safe in terms of the arms preventing the toy from slipping completely inside of you. I would suggest that you always cover with a condom as the bumpy texture makes it difficult to clean and the material itself is not sterilizable.

Material / Texture

This pretty, purple toy is made of TPE (Thermoplastic Elastomer), with a nubbed/ridged texture and a hard plastic base. Unfortunately, the texture does next to nothing to add stimulation. However, it does make anal insertion a bit more difficult, necessitating a warm-up before employing it in that way. If you plan to purchase this toy intending to use it anally, I would recommend it for more advanced users.

Design / Shape / Size

The design of this toy is, honestly, pretty pathetic. It has a bulbous shape, which is wider at the top than it is at the base. It has two textures. The head has oval shaped areas on either side with a bumpy texture and the shaft has some ridges that are both entirely unnoticeable when the toy is inserted. The dual arms have smooth, marble-sized swells on the ends. The arms are meant to stimulate the user anally and clitorally, but they fail miserably. They are far too short. One arm pushes against the perineum and the other digs rather painfully into the urethral entrance. They are fairly flexible, so they can be pushed aside, but then why not simply purchase a plain dildo, without the useless arms?

In theory, it is reversible. By that I mean that it is symmetrical, with its a bumpy texture and twin arms appearing on both sides. There is nothing to designate one arm as an anal stimulator and one as a clitoral stimulator. I find that to be an important flaw in the design of this toy. I would not want the side that I used anally to be used anywhere else by mistake.

The My Pleaser has 4 1/2 inches of insertable length and 1 3/8 inches in diameter. Totaling 5 1/2 inches in length from base to tip, this toy is easy to hide due to its fairly small size, but it is not very discreet. It's pretty clearly some kind of sex toy.

Functions / Performance / Controls

The function of this toy is very simple. It has three levels of vibration - low, medium, and high. Clicking the button at the base cycles once through the settings. The controls are straightforward and easy to use. The fourth click shuts off the vibrations. The toy is actually moderately strong and impressively quiet. It has held up to both splashed water in the shower and being fully immersed.

As far as I can tell, the arms actually translate vibrations remarkably well, for the vibrator being located at the tip of the main shaft. However, since they cannot reach the areas they're intended to stimulate, that fact is kind of irrelevant.

Care and Maintenance

TPE toys cannot be disinfected with boiling water. You can wash them with warm water and toy cleaner or mild soap. The TPE of this toy is quite firm, with little to no give in the shaft and slight flexibility in the arms. Do not use oil-based lubricants with this toy as they may be incompatible. I store the toy in a covered bin beside my bed.

Packaging

The toy is packaged in a simple plastic bubble pack with a cheesy nude couple in the background. It does not include instructions. The package cannot be used as a gift box, but could be used as a storage box, I suppose, as it snaps open and shut easily.

Personal comments

I am honestly considering hacking off the arms. I'm not kidding. The bumpy texture is really pleasant for stimulating the clitoris, but it is very awkward to pull it off with the arms in the way. I'll report back if I do end up performing some modifications.
Follow-up commentary
This toy has officially bit the dust. It sat unused for a few months and when I decided to give it another whirl, it apparently decided to kick the bucket in my absence! It wasn't really jostled about or dropped or damaged in any way. I'm not sure how simply neglecting it caused it to stop working, but...I tried various batteries, I shook it, I talked lovingly to it...Nothin'! Not even a wiggle. I can't say that I'm very sad over the loss since I really had never used it much, but...I was surprised to have a toy just conk out after not being used for a while!
This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.
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Comments
  • lexical
    lexical  
    My pleasure!
  • Teaser
    Teaser  
    Thank you for the great review! Sorry it wasn't all that.
  • lexical
    lexical  
    You're welcome!
  • CinLuvsBre
    CinLuvsBre  
    Nice!
  • lexical
    lexical  
    Thanks? lol
  • yarii
    yarii  
    ty!
  • Lynx
    Lynx  
    Thanks for the review!
  • TrophyWife
    TrophyWife  
    Thanks (:
  • marshmallow
    marshmallow  
    thanks!
  • lexical
    lexical  
    You're welcome!
  • xjonxthexgreenx
    xjonxthexgreenx  
    thanks for the review
  • yellowlemoned
    yellowlemoned  
    Thanks for the review, sorry it was a bust.
  • Anne
    Anne  
    great review
  • Bubaloo
    Bubaloo  
    Thanks!
  • Rawr4483
    Rawr4483  
    Thanks!
  • Nacht Stern
    Nacht Stern  
    Thank you!
  • Allison.Wilder
    Allison.Wilder  
    Great review, thanks!
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