Club vibe - strap-on vibrator by OhMiBod - review by Alan & Michele

The OhMiBod Club Vibe is a portable music-driven vibrator, designed to nestle in your underwear and translate the beat of your favorite song into orgasm-inducing vibrations. It can be used with any MP3 player or other electronic device that has a 3.5mm headphone/output jack (including laptops and cell phones), or switched to Ambient mode to pick up the music in a room.

Although geared toward song lovers, the Manual mode of this nifty vibrator makes it useful for absolutely anyone who likes to enjoy discreet pleasure. That means if you're one of the rare people on the planet who has no source of music, no cell phone, no computer, and never goes anywhere with any substantial ambient noise, you can still enjoy this vibrator like any other. With the simple click of a button, you can experience a wide array of pre-programmed settings from a semi-gentle vibration to a powerful rhythmic pulsing.

Though the powerful little bullet vibrator can be put anywhere you'd like, it truly rocks as a hands-free clitoral stimulator and includes everything you need to start enjoying yourself right away. You get the bullet vibrator and controller, a set of batteries, a "Y" splitter cord so you can attach your earphones, a black thong, and a classy velvet storage bag to hold it all.

Both the bullet vibe and the controller are made of non-porous phthalate-free ABS plastic with a polyurethane coating. It's velvety smooth and feels nice against the skin, and has a barely-noticeable clean plastic scent that dissipates quickly after a wipe down or two.

The thong is sewn from cotton and lace, both of which are soft and stretchy. It's very comfortable, so even if you aren't using the vibrator with it, it's nice enough for everyday wear.

Club Vibe is designed to be both discreet and convenient, and is small enough to take anywhere. The controller measures 3" long by 1 ½" wide by ¾" deep and has a durable belt clip on the back that holds it in place as you move. It weighs no more than the average cell phone, so it doesn't feel bulky when you're wearing it.

On top of the controller is the plug-in for the 30" long bullet vibe cord, while the plug-in for the 50" cord that attaches to your music source is on the bottom, so there's less chance of tangling the two. The extra length on the bottom cord is really useful if you are hooking up to something like your computer or a guitar amp, because you can move around without worrying about pulling it loose, and there is a 4" splitter at one end so you can plug in headphones too. Both cords are very flexible, so any excess length can be tucked into your pocket or rolled and pressed into your waist band.

The tiny bullet vibe is the perfect size to nestle between the labia and stays right against the clit, even when you're dancing or walking. Its sleek shape also makes for very easy insertion if you choose to use it internally.

The thong fits underwear size 4/5 loosely but still comfortably, and it has enough stretch that we guesstimate it should work for women who wear up to a 10/12 in underwear. Even if doesn't fit you it makes no difference though, because Club Vibe works just as well in any other panties or thongs.

The Club Vibe is powered by two AAA batteries (included) which fit into a compartment on the back of the controller, and the vibrations are felt evenly all over the bullet. There's a textured thumb switch on the side that you use to select one of the three clearly-marked modes:

* Manual Mode: lets you cycle through seven preset vibration patterns (without music) using a push button on the front of the controller. There is a second push button right above it that allows you to turn off the toy when you're done. The patterns are as follows:
1. Medium strength steady vibration... the bullet is whispery quiet in your hand, and nobody will ever hear it in your pants.
2. Strong steady vibration... still quiet enough that it can't be heard more than a foot away if you hold it in your hand, and silent in your pants.
3. Crazy numbing steady vibration... the bullet makes a muted high-pitched humming noise. It can be heard across the room if held in your hand, and inside pants it's reduced to a steady mechanical drone but you'll still need some noise in the room to totally hide it.
4. A strong pulsing vibration (about 2 per second)... same noise level as #2.
5. Escalating vibrations; 4 levels from gentle to numbing, each lasting about 1 second long... quiet until you get to that last one, then it's the same as #3.
6. A rhythmic vibration; it rolls up from gentle to medium for 4 seconds, then 2 strong jolts, then a little more intense roll for 3 seconds, then 2 more jolts... fairly quiet, but the jolts are noisy like #3.
7. A rhythmic vibration; gives you a one second each of the basic levels (med, fast, crazy), then 2 strong jolts, 4 seconds of a slow rolling vibration, then jolt jolt... again those jolts are something that are easily heard if the room is quiet.

* Ambient Mode: vibrates to sounds around you. This is meant for a club or concert setting where there is a lot of loud noise, and it responds more easily and intensely to higher-pitched sounds in this mode. A spinner dial on the bottom of the controller lets you adjust the sensitivity of the unit to sound. However, normal conversation or even a loud television in your room is not enough to set off the vibrations, even at it's highest sensitivity setting. There are tiny speaker holes on the front of the controller to receive the input in this mode, and if you plan to tease your lover vocally you will have to put your mouth directly in front of it to get any reaction at all. There is no on/off button, but it will only activate if the sound levels are high enough anyway.

* Music Mode: vibrates to music from your MP3 player, iPod, Blackberry phone, laptop, guitar amp, CD player, or any electronic device that has a 3.5mm headphone/output jack. Again, there is no on/off button for this mode because when the music stops, the toy stops. The dial on the bottom of the controller ups the sensitivity of the Club Vibe, but how much vibration you get is also affected by how loud the volume is set on your MP3 player (or whatever else you've got it hooked to). The higher the volume, the stronger the vibes. In this mode the toy seems to respond to the mid-tones of a song, picking up the general rhythm and beat of it well enough that you might be able to play a sex-rated game of 'Name That Tune' with your partner. We found that Nickelback's "Burn it to the Ground" is a one-way ticket to a fast orgasm, as is "Going Down On It" by Hot Action Cop. "Princes of the Universe" by Queen gives a real interesting ride too, but with how well this vibe responds it's likely to make music of any genre pleasurable.

The Club Vibe is not meant to be submerged, but you can use soap and water to wash the bullet vibe part without any problems. You can also use your favorite toy cleaner, or give it all a wipe down with alcohol, but be careful never to get any liquids in the controller. If you choose to use a lube, any type will do but we found that water-based was the easiest to wash off.

The thong is machine washable and dryable, and our test model has already stood up to three washings with no sign of wear.

This toy comes in a black cardboard box that has a silhouetted club scene on the front and "Club Vibe" in silver letters. On the back is a picture of a woman dancing and some general product info. A thin plastic pullout tray inside has separate wells for each of the items, and there's an instruction manual printed in eight different languages. It all looks totally high-class and would make an excellent gift.

As cool as the packaging is, you won't need it to store your Club Vibe in though because this toy also comes with a black velvet drawstring bag with 'OhMiBod' embroidered on the outside that is roomy enough for it all.

The OhMiBod Club Vibe also comes with a one-year warranty, but as well made as this little gem is it's doubtful you'll need it.

Michele says:
I tried this in Manual Mode first, and for me it's got the perfect vibration preset levels for clit orgasms. Level one gets me warmed up, two takes me right to the edge, and three finishes the job every time. Music Mode is useful for doing the weekend housework (or rather distracting me from it). Most brands of panties have a cotton liner in the crotch, which has an opening at one end--- I slipped the bullet in there and it made even the most boring tasks feel sooo good! I play metal guitar, so I tried hooking it to my amp too and found myself composing riffs I'd never thought of before. I love this thing! Saturday we tried Ambient Mode at a club and I wasn't quite as impressed though. The bullet did stay in place and did feel good (mostly), but it picked up more than just the music noise and thus was inconsistent and at times too overpowering. I ventured into the bathroom and switched to using it internally thinking that might be better, but the vibe was too powerful for me to be comfortable that way and I had to switch back to clitoral use. Like I said, it felt good, but I still wound up dragging Alan out to the car to finish things up before we could enjoy the rest of the evening.

Alan says:
This seemed like a girl toy to me, but I did stuff it in my pants during a couple of movies and it felt pretty good. The first level isn't great, but levels two and three give me a hard-on whether I put the bullet thingy next to my cock or under my balls. I foresee Michele chasing me around with this thing a lot.
We were both disappointed with Ambient mode though. It didn't get her off when we were out dancing, and at home I was bummed out when I figured out it couldn't pick up the sound of me talking to her in the bedroom. I had planned to get her off with a combo of hand action and talking dirty with the vibe, but unless I yelled at the thing it didn't work. She figured out that it would work if your mouth was close to the speaker, but that was just awkward.