Past Abuse/Mental Health and BDSM Interests (Poll for the kinky AND non-kinky folks)

Winifred Winifred
I was sexually abused by men in my childhood and lately I've had a lot of fun dominating my boyfriend sexually. I feel powerful when I'm in control. I think this is definitely linked to the way I've been treating by men at times in my life and the mental problems I have because of it.
11/13/2012
atryonix atryonix
Not really a big thing for me
11/13/2012
Vanille Vanille
I have mental health issues and am into BDSM. However, even if I was 'mentally sound', I still think I would be into it.

Sure it can correlate for some people.
11/13/2012
So Long Ya Doofuses! So Long Ya Doofuses!
I'm an odd little Other. I have had different mental health problems and although I do not practice BDSM with another person, the idea of being a Domme appeals to me. However, I am extremely terrified by the prospect of being anybody's sub; it brings back too many hurtful memories.
11/20/2012
destruction13 destruction13
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
There seems to be a common perception outside of the kink community that those involved in BDSM are either mentally unstable or have been abused in the past. It's my personal belief that, like any group, the community consists of those with and ... More
I am into BDSM and i do not have any past abuse or mental health issues. This is interesting to me because if somebody were to have past abuse it would make more scince that they werent into BDSM because it would scare them if i were to go through a sitiuation like that i don't think i would be to excited to do it again. i like it because it gives me some kind of anticipation, fear, not knowing whats going to happen but trusting my significant other .
11/21/2012
destruction13 destruction13
Quote:
Originally posted by pirata
nope, I'm perfectly mentally healthy and I like BDSM so take THAT society!
Thank you! lol
11/21/2012
joolie joolie
As early as I can remember, people who were tied up or the thought of being tied up excited me, and I'm talking about early childhood here. I remember being told not to touch myself.
I became aware of some mental abuse in my early teens. My mother was an alcoholic whose moods changed on a dime.
I have not been physically (sexually or otherwise) abused. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed as depressive. The only possible connection would be releasing guilt if I am dominated, but I think that's a little kink that I was born having.
11/21/2012
Cinnyree Cinnyree
I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder. I have never been into BDSM because i thought it was a control thing. I really want to look further into it. I hope this site can help.
12/04/2012
ArcaneBlast ArcaneBlast
I am into BDSM, but because of such I've had my trust violated by someone who thought it was OK to abuse me which is why although I still am into it, I usually don't tell anyone for that fear. I also suffer from depression and anxiety.

With that being said, I feel that there is a slight correlation that isn't mutually exclusive; while those with mental disorders or were traumatized by abuse might be more predisposed to liking BDSM whether it be the need to gain power or the opposite, or something in the brain makes them like being controlled or controlling, it doesn't go the other way in that those who like BDSM don't necessarily have anything disorders.
12/05/2012
Katelyn Katelyn
These results don't correlate because the amount of people that have been abused is far greater (in general society) than those who enjoy BDSM, therefore you will always have a greater quantity of people who have both been abused and are into BDSM, than those who haven't been abused and are into BDSM. The two are mutually exclusive, and presenting data this way is extremely misleading.
12/06/2012
samanthas samanthas
Quote:
Originally posted by ArcaneBlast
I am into BDSM, but because of such I've had my trust violated by someone who thought it was OK to abuse me which is why although I still am into it, I usually don't tell anyone for that fear. I also suffer from depression and ... More
Yes, I think there is at least some connection. From my (not really random and extremely unscientific) sampling of acquaintances, a lot of people who like BDSM have experienced abuse in the past. (I'm not as sure about the mental health connection: if we are talking about mental health issues that DON'T stem from past abuse, the BDSM folks don't seem to have any more than the general population.)

But it's hardly a universal phenomenon. No mental health issues and no abuse in my past, I'm at least moderately into BDSM, and I'm not the only one.
12/06/2012
SaiDiscordia SaiDiscordia
I am into BDSM and while I do have a past with some abuse, I was into the practice before any of that happened. The abuse came from a bad relationship with someone who did not understand the true practices of the community. He did not really believe in the core rules of safe, sane, and consensual. Although it did take me some time to enter the practice again after that relationship, but that was more of a trust issue thing. So, I do not think that my abuse dictated my choice for the lifestyle nor has the abuse caused any drastic changes in my limits. If anything being in a healthy relationship has made me more comfortable and open-minded with them. Hence why I voted "I am into BDSM and do not have any past abuse or mental health issues."
12/06/2012
bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
There seems to be a common perception outside of the kink community that those involved in BDSM are either mentally unstable or have been abused in the past. It's my personal belief that, like any group, the community consists of those with and ... More
I have often wondered about this, myself.

One perspective is that some but not all of us kinksters use BDSM as a way of working through past traumas.

Also, "mental health issues" could encompass anything from mild anxiety to catatonic schizophrenia, right?
12/06/2012
bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by destruction13
I am into BDSM and i do not have any past abuse or mental health issues. This is interesting to me because if somebody were to have past abuse it would make more scince that they werent into BDSM because it would scare them if i were to go through a ... More
Not everyone's pattern of abuse resembles their play.

For instance, sometimes a person who was raped likes tying men up, or sometimes a person who was molested as a child likes being beaten up in bed.

It doesn't have to be a recreation of a traumatic event.
12/06/2012
anonkitty anonkitty
I'm into kink and have had no history of abuse or related mental health issues.
12/07/2012
Genderfree Genderfree
Wow, I have been sexually abused in the past and I, myself, am amazed that the results have an almost perfectly 2:1 abused/not abused ratio. That is sort of scary. We also have to consider that the sample if EF, so maybe the next step would be to ask as a blanket question (somewhere where more vanilla people would look, like in the lounge) if they have been abused or not in the past, then compare it to other samples. Also realize a large percentage of EF is female, and statistically more females are abused than males. So this is quite interesting.
12/08/2012
Geography Geography
This is really interesting to hear about. Thanks everyone for sharing! I am into BDSM but did not suffer abuse and I do not have any mental health issues.
12/09/2012
TheirPet TheirPet
For the longest time I was into BDSM and perfectly healthy but I ended up in a relationship with an abusive person. I left them a long time ago now I'm in a healthy relationship that is safe, non-abusive BDSM.
12/10/2012
ginnyluvspotter ginnyluvspotter
Interesting theory
12/10/2012
HydrogenBondage HydrogenBondage
Great topic! This would be very interesting to see in a clinical study.

Into BDSM and have past experience with abuse and mental health issues.
12/10/2012
SexToys-R-Us SexToys-R-Us
I'm neither here nor there when it comes to BDSM
12/14/2012
FrustratedFemme FrustratedFemme
I'm into BDSM, and I've been suicidal in the past. However, those issues have been resolved, and I don't think they had anything to do with my kinkiness.
12/16/2012
thisisadeletedaccount thisisadeletedaccount
I have never been abused, and while I have had some issues with anxiety I've never been diagnosed with anything on that front and I wouldn't say it was ever disorder-level. However, I do have some compulsive tics and one of the things I like about getting into subspace during BDSM play is that all of my tics mellow out/go away when I'm deep into a scene. It's like my energy has been refocused and my mind doesn't have space to make me twitch or tap things in patterns - it's very peaceful.
01/08/2013
KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
I fundamentally agree. I have both mental issues and suffered abuse, but I know others that came from happy, healthy(ish) homes that are way more kinky then I am.
01/08/2013
gwenevieve gwenevieve
Quote:
Originally posted by - Kira -
There seems to be a common perception outside of the kink community that those involved in BDSM are either mentally unstable or have been abused in the past. It's my personal belief that, like any group, the community consists of those with and ... More
Unfortunately I do suffer from anxiety and past abuse but I have always felt that I belonged in this community
05/09/2013
chicagobearsfan chicagobearsfan
Although I was abused in the past, I was interested in bdsm first, so no correlation.
05/09/2013
sunflower sunflower
I am into BDSM and haven't been a victim of abuse. I do have minor mental health problems (anxiety, depression) but I voted no on the poll because in no way do those issues contribute to my interest in kink.
05/10/2013
twelve13 twelve13
I'm into BDSM and I've never been abused, but I do have a history of mild depression, eating disorders, OCD, and generalized anxiety disorder?
05/10/2013
dancingduo dancingduo
I wonder if those with abuse in the past tend to be more submissive or dominant? We are into something's but she is much more aggressive than I am sexually.
05/15/2013
xcapricax xcapricax
I think it helps people.
05/15/2013
Total posts: 70
Unique posters: 68