Do you use a safe word

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Do you use a safe word

Vnessa Vnessa
This isn't exactly a BDSM topic, although it can apply.

We are just a regular couple who enjoy slightly rough sex. I'm not talking smack me up rough or anything. I like it when he's just a bit more firm with me, when he uses his own hands to bind me in place as he goes down on me, or when he uses his size and strength to grab and place me exactly where he wants me. I don't always want to be treated as a delicate and breakable piece of China.

Sometimes, I think he forgets he's quite a bit larger and much stronger. I'm quite small so there are times I feel his arms constricting too tightly. I think, this might be a good moment to have a safe word like "yellow" just to let him know that I still like what he's doing but there's a level of pain that is being reached that could cause harm. I don't want to say, you're hurting me and kill the mood. After all, I do like our rough play. He just doesn't realize his strength when we are both caught up in the moment and going strong.

So, does anyone have little safe words in use other than, "ouch...stop...that's too much..." And so forth? I want to keep our sex HOT and not fizzle it by killing his mojo while keeping me from being squashed or possibly hurt in the process.
04/13/2015
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Inquisitor Inquisitor
Hell yes! I need them because I confuse "Don't stop" with "Stop". For some reason all I hear is "Stop" and so i do. As you can imagine, this can kill the vibe. My partner likes to be thrown around also so get where you are coming from.
04/13/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Inquisitor
Hell yes! I need them because I confuse "Don't stop" with "Stop". For some reason all I hear is "Stop" and so i do. As you can imagine, this can kill the vibe. My partner likes to be thrown around also so get where you are coming from.
See, you get it and I don't want things to stop but I might need it to loosen up a little. Otherwise I might end up dislocated or something lol.

I want to be sensitive of his feelings also. He would be crushed if he ever thought he was actually hurting me.
04/13/2015
Rossie Rossie
I don't use any safe words in particular since we don't do much rough sex. If he does get too carried away, "Ouch" is exactly the word that I'll blurt out to let him know he's hurting me, and it's good enough for us.
04/13/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
I don't use any safe words in particular since we don't do much rough sex. If he does get too carried away, "Ouch" is exactly the word that I'll blurt out to let him know he's hurting me, and it's good enough for us.
Ahhh, such a simple and affective word If only it worked for us lol.

When I use it, it's as if he has just broken the Virgin Mary I get get the pat down followed by a round of 50 questions that totally breaks the mood (What happened, are you okay, did I hurt you....). Then I have to explain, I'm "ok...but..." this in particular wasn't working, but don't stop for God's sake lol. By then I've lost all focus and I'm pretty sure he has also.
04/13/2015
Rossie Rossie
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
Ahhh, such a simple and affective word If only it worked for us lol.

When I use it, it's as if he has just broken the Virgin Mary I get get the pat down followed by a round of 50 questions that totally breaks the mood (What happened, ...
I'm chuckling over here! It does break the mood, but I'm sure you're also inwardly touched by your husband's caring and loving questions, right?
04/14/2015
Vnessa Vnessa
Quote:
Originally posted by Rossie
I'm chuckling over here! It does break the mood, but I'm sure you're also inwardly touched by your husband's caring and loving questions, right?
Absolutely . Then I'm like...GO, get to work lol
04/14/2015
Inquisitor Inquisitor
Quote:
Originally posted by Vnessa
Absolutely . Then I'm like...GO, get to work lol
Well said!
04/15/2015
Raymaker Raymaker
Green/Yellow/Red seems the most efficient system if you were to use safewords, but unless you're not good at distinguishing Stop from Don't Stop, I'd sooner just use those to be honest.
08/28/2015
Total posts: 9
Unique posters: 4