Is this cheating?

SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
What do you consider to be cheating. I am curious because some people have different thresholds.
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Hugging
Kissing (just a peck on the lips)
30
Making out
57
Mutual masturbation (hand job/fingering)
58
Masturbating in front of another person
55
Oral sex
58
Sexual intercourse
59
Anal sex
58
BDSM play where no sexual contact happens
45
Flirting
4
Sexual fantasy's about another person
8
Watching porn
7
Solo masturbation
2
Having feelings that are more than friends with another
31
Same sex contact with a partner
48
Total votes: 520 (61 voters)
Poll is closed
04/16/2013
  • Buy 1 Toy Get 1 FREE
  • Better Price Sale - Save 70%
  • Better Price Sale - Save 60%
  • Better Price Sale - Save 50%
  • Better Price - Save 40%
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All promotions
shnsmth6 shnsmth6
Quote:
Originally posted by SaucyxGirl
What do you consider to be cheating. I am curious because some people have different thresholds.
most of these i'd consider cheating
04/16/2013
Gary Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
04/16/2013
Gone (LD29) Gone (LD29)
I think it depends on the specific boundaries you have set with your partner. If in doubt, see Gary's awesome response above.
04/16/2013
SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
LOL very true. The amazing part is I have actually met people who believe that masturbation is cheating and others who think that same sex sexual encounters is not. This got me thinking as to what people think constitutes cheating and how we may have different definitions.
04/16/2013
jr2012 jr2012
for me, it would be any sexual contact done without my knowledge or permission. Flirting, Hugging, and porn watching are already established to be okay.
04/16/2013
SecretKinksters SecretKinksters
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
Totally agree!
04/16/2013
LAndJ LAndJ
I would consider a lot of the more physical ones cheating, but though I would consider some of the others not as cheating, they still wouldn't make me want to stay with my partner.
04/16/2013
ShadowedSeductress ShadowedSeductress
I consider the majority of these things to be cheating. I agree with Gary!
04/16/2013
pokefan15 pokefan15
I completely agree with gary!
04/16/2013
Noelle Noelle
Quote:
Originally posted by SaucyxGirl
What do you consider to be cheating. I am curious because some people have different thresholds.
I would say most are considered cheating.
04/18/2013
twelve13 twelve13
Apparently, I think a lot of things would be cheating. Just not hugging, flirting, porn, masturbation, or fantasies. If I were with my partner, a lot of the others would not be cheating.
04/18/2013
CE CE
Cheating is all about deceiving or hiding something from your partner. If any activity (cybersex, phone sex, physical contact) has been discussed and agreed to, then none of it would be cheating. If you are sharing an intimate experience (even if not in person) with someone else and you do NOT tell your partner, then its cheating.

Heck, having a cup of coffee with someone is cheating if you're doing it because you have a crush on them. Yet in an open relationship, having sex w/someone else could be perfectly fine. It all depends on the dynamics of each specific relationship.
04/18/2013
Chastity Darling Chastity Darling
Quote:
Originally posted by CE
Cheating is all about deceiving or hiding something from your partner. If any activity (cybersex, phone sex, physical contact) has been discussed and agreed to, then none of it would be cheating. If you are sharing an intimate experience (even if not ... More
I totally agree. Cheating, for me, is more about deceit than the actual sex act. I have no problem with porn, but if hubby was purposely hiding his porn watching then I would be concerned.
04/18/2013
bayosgirl bayosgirl
Most are cheating.
04/19/2013
Rokmai Rokmai
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
The answer to "Is this cheating?" is always "Yes"
04/20/2013
dancingduo dancingduo
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
This...as an oversimplification to answer this question.
04/20/2013
Kiss Kiss
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
You're right!
04/20/2013
Creepellah Creepellah
"Having feelings that are more than friends with another"
04/20/2013
Hummingbird Hummingbird
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
If you have to ask, then it probably is.
I agree with Gary too, if you have to ask then there is no question about it.
04/21/2013
synj66 synj66
anything physical (minus hugging) with another person with questionable intent is cheating to me. Masturbation is def. not. That seems rediculous to me, but to each their own.
04/26/2013
mandaj mandaj
Anything physical besides the friendly hug. And anything sexual related is counted. I don't think flirting or havin a crush or watching porn really counts. U can look but make sure you never touch. If u want to touch, grow some and break it off with the other. I can not stand a cheater !
04/26/2013
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by SaucyxGirl
What do you consider to be cheating. I am curious because some people have different thresholds.
Cheating is depriving your partner of honesty. You have cheated them of trust, of time, of experiences and of your affection. What you do is less important than your reasons for breaking trust with your partner. I mean C'mon like porn we ALL know when we are cheating. We can explain that feeling away all we want but we know when we are stepping close to the line let alone over it.

For us cheating comes into play when we decide to hide what we are doing and we close the door on the openness of our relationship. It's the intent that informs the cheating not the action for us. Sex and being sexual is incidental, it's the hiding and sneaking around that put trust in peril.
04/26/2013
SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
Cheating is depriving your partner of honesty. You have cheated them of trust, of time, of experiences and of your affection. What you do is less important than your reasons for breaking trust with your partner. I mean C'mon like porn we ALL know ... More
Very well said.

I did this poll because a co-worker of mine has actually said that she would break up with a guy if she ever found out that he masturbated. She considers masturbation to be cheating. Yes, even if he were to stroke himself in front of her to get hard she has said that is also cheating. That outside of peeing and cleaning that his hand on his junk constitutes another touching himself.

This mindset really blew me away and quite honestly she is very ignorant when it comes to sex and relationship. This is a twenty-three year old female that jumps in bed with a guy she just met (not judging) has three kids yet didn't know where her clit was, and has said on multiple occasions that the female orgasm is a myth. As in women don't have orgasms....not talking about female ejaculation mind you!

I was very curious to see what others would have to say, and what others view as cheating and quite honestly the answers haven't shocked me too much
04/30/2013
karenm karenm
Most of these things.
04/30/2013
butts butts
I know there's 3 people here who view "viewing porn" as cheating.... but man, that drives me up the wall.

For me, I'd really only consider affectionate touching (like cuddling or kissing, or sexual) as cheating if it was without the partner's knowledge and wasn't welcome. I have SO many friends who are in open or poly relationships, and while we aren't open/poly ourselves, I'm not a jealous person and I know that we are both human. Having feelings for someone else isn't cheating to me, acting on it can be if it's not approved by your partner. You can't help feelings, that's out of your control, it's your actions and communication that count. To me at least.
04/30/2013
SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
Quote:
Originally posted by butts
I know there's 3 people here who view "viewing porn" as cheating.... but man, that drives me up the wall.

For me, I'd really only consider affectionate touching (like cuddling or kissing, or sexual) as cheating if it was ... More
I know right. The whole porn thing gets me too.

As to the human part that you brought up. My boyfriend is absolutely not into the idea of open relationships yet he and I have discussed the whole attracted to others thing. As he says, it is only human to look and think and that sometimes yes yes you may find yourself attracted but it is out of respect that one doesn't act without prior permission from your partner He is also not a very jealous person and on a few occasions we have actually talked about how cute a female might be, or I'll point out a cute guy and he'll laugh. Gotta love a man who is secure enough in the relationship that you can actually say, "Damn he has a nice package" and he doesn't bat a lash!
05/01/2013
SelectZen SelectZen
Thank god nobody considers hugging to be cheating. I mean people hug their relatives etc...
05/02/2013
hillys hillys
yeah seriously but sometimes kissing is a way of greeting (at least thats what i've noticed so it totally depends situationally) also i don't think grabbing a cup of coffee with someone you like is cheating unless you have the intention of it going places. as long as your honest with your partner ... most wil understand you wont' betray them even with a crush because most people get crushes
05/03/2013
TheirPet TheirPet
BDSM is not cheating if you have the consent of your partner/inform your partner of what you're doing. I know a lot of couples who 'play' with others in this aspect. If you're doing it secretly though, it's kind of cheaty.
05/06/2013
  • 1
  • 2
Total posts: 36
Unique posters: 32