When friend become another gender

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When friend become another gender

Retro.old Retro.old
I had 2 of my friend recently going trough gender change therapy an surgery... They both we females and now i have two male friends, and i love them but i still would accidentally call them their "female" names, or refer of them as females.... I know it hurts my friends feeling but can not help it...
08/11/2011
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Ghost Ghost
Two friends?? Wow. I'm sure they understand your mistake and don't be too hard on yourself. Just keep trying to remember to call them their proper names. It will stick eventually.
08/12/2011
Ryuson Ryuson
If you try your hardest, I'm sure that they forgive you! It's tough for everyone!
08/12/2011
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Retro.old
I had 2 of my friend recently going trough gender change therapy an surgery... They both we females and now i have two male friends, and i love them but i still would accidentally call them their "female" names, or refer of them as ...
Honey it takes time to reorientate your brain....just make the effort and love your friends regardless of their bits! Appologize for making the mistake and give em both a big hug for just being themselves. You know it was an accident not an attempt to shame them so be gentle with yourself.
08/12/2011
M121212 M121212
I've had this issue too. It does change with time
08/12/2011
thebest thebest
It gets easier, just keep trying
08/13/2011
anonomous anonomous
Keep trying. See the outside as a new person but the inside is the same. in order to reach the inside you have to direct your communication correctly to the outside? idk lol
08/13/2011
GenderSexplorations GenderSexplorations
As long as they can tell that you're really trying, I'm sure they won't be offended. It becomes habit after enough time, I promise!
08/14/2011
Peggi Peggi
Quote:
Originally posted by Retro.old
I had 2 of my friend recently going trough gender change therapy an surgery... They both we females and now i have two male friends, and i love them but i still would accidentally call them their "female" names, or refer of them as ...
When it comes to changing the way you view people, sometimes it can take a little bit of time. It is ok to have the occasional slip-up, but you will want to try your best to use their male names, I have a friend who went through the m2f change, and I had a bit of trouble trying to remember to refer to her as "Chrissy" instead of "Chris", but in time it felt natural.

They will give you time to adjust but certainly do your best to remember to adjust pronouns and names to fit accordingly. Some can be a bit sensitive about this issue if they have gone through therapy and surgeries, it is a long hard road and often, because of the adjustment friends and family go through in remembering that things are different now, they may start to pull away and detach from those who knew them prior to transformation
08/18/2011
LuciFaery LuciFaery
Everybody slips up. So long as they know you're not doing it on purpose, they should be understanding that you're trying. It's a long hard process for everyone, after all.
08/22/2011
Oliver Gray Oliver Gray
They're the same person, you need to try your hardest because it's incredibly disrespectful to call your male friends female. Just care about their feelings :3
03/13/2012
c90 c90
I know you can't help it, and hopefully they know that too, but make the effort to apologize and correct yourself when it happens. You're not doing it on purpose, but it probably still hurts.

Hopefully they've got some patience for you and understand that it takes time to adjust, but have some patience for them too if they get upset with you at times.
03/13/2012
MasonJ MasonJ
This is a transition for everyone involved. Just have compassion and do your best. Support your friends, as best as possible....that's the important thing.
03/13/2012
TheParrishism TheParrishism
I think that so long as they understand that you are trying your best, it should all work out fine.
03/14/2012
Sam I Am Sam I Am
It takes time, just make sure you're supportive of them and they will see that and understand =) A transition isn't necessarily just for the person transitioning; it's a transition for the people close to them as well.
03/20/2012
Schattenstern Schattenstern
Make sure that you've changed their names in your phone and other places you contact them. Maybe seeing it all of the time will help?
04/21/2012
spineyogurt spineyogurt
Theyll forgive you eventually!
04/21/2012
MasonM MasonM
Quote:
Originally posted by Retro.old
I had 2 of my friend recently going trough gender change therapy an surgery... They both we females and now i have two male friends, and i love them but i still would accidentally call them their "female" names, or refer of them as ...
It can be difficult. My husband is still dealing with the fact that I'm changing and makes mistakes.

Try your absolute hardest and apologize when you make the mistake.
04/24/2012
Total posts: 18
Unique posters: 18