Secret sex lives of superheros!

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Secret sex lives of superheros!

That Weird Guy That Weird Guy
I could go on and on with this, but I think it would become a chore to read instead of fun, so enjoy, I will post more if you want me to, please leave a comment... there are 1000's of superheros I did not cover and there are plenty more funny ones out there I'm sure...


The Flash (Super Speed) – I fucked the Flash.. Oh yeah, how long did it last - 10 seconds? That’s right sex is over and done in 5 seconds. To him it lasted a few hours. If you want to be famous for a speed record this is your man to do it with.

Rogue (Life Drain) – Well, you can’t have sex because you’ll almost kill who ever you touch. This is the worst super hero to date OF ALL TIME!!! I bet she has the largest dildo collection of any super hero. And I bet Xavier loves to tap into her wild dreams, you know, because he is telepathic and can do that shit..

Banshee (Loud Vocals) - Everyone would know you had an orgasm when you say AHHHHH!!!! to the whole world.

Spiderman (Webs) – BDSM expert. Readily available restraints at the flick of a wrist. Blind folds do not work for this fella, nope his spidy sense picked up all your movements already.

Wolverine (Healing) - He could screw anyone he wanted and rid the STD’s on his own over time. He is the stud of superheros with a screw anyone policy.

Multiple Man (Duplicates) - You could have an orgy with 50 people at the same time. Imagine what type of heaven that would be to orgasm 50 times all at once, don't forget that's with 50 different people too.

Mystique (Shape shift) - She can be anyone you want to fuck. TBH she is purple in natural form with yellow eyes and I think thats hotter than any human!! KINKY!! She just needs pointy ears, oh wait, she can have those too!! I MUST HAVE THIS AS A SUPER DATE!!!

Forge (Invention) - Can make the best sex toys of all time. Maybe he will invent a sex doll that is actually realistic with robotic arms and legs and can talk!

The Human Torch (Fire) – He is so fucking HOT! ….......... ouch!

Blade (Vampire) – He has got to go if he wants to kill the chick with vaginal fangs! If I was a chick vampire I would love to have a pair of vaginal fangs and eat cock often, very often. /wink

Cat woman (Tail) – Anyone who's got a tail is sexy, it's a nice flogger! and you can tell when she is really excited.. wag.. wag.. wiggle, wiggle...

Batman (Money) – Who doesn't want to have sex with the richest man. He has a “sex dungeon” too, or at least thats what I thought it was used for....It's not? There must be a secret door, because he has a few of those, so why not?

Superman (X-Ray vision) – Well to bad for him he sees through the clothes and straight through the boobs. He must like skeletons, thats a bit more kinky than I care to imagine. He does use X-ray vision quite often though... must be his thing..

The Thing (Bumpy Skin) – If you like textured dildos this guy has the best kind!

Hellboy (Big hand) – The king of fisting, only for the true professional fistees.

The hulk (Anger) – Don't mention his premature ejaculation or he will rip you in half!

Wonder Woman (Lasso of truth) – One lasso entanglement and your spitting out all deepest of secrets like how you cheated on wonder woman for hot sex.

Invisible woman (invisibility) – Is this the right hole, poke, OW THAT'S MY EAR!!! It would be easier if you didn't turn invisible, we have a dimmer switch for this reason...

Silver surfer (made of cosmic material) – if you want a shiny new sex toy the surfer can deliver he is made of cosmic material it must feel divine, I mean just look at that shine!! don't get to excited his crotch is just smooth..
04/22/2009
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That Weird Guy That Weird Guy
I can only imagine what a telepathic super being would know and find out about everyone.. I would feel uncomfortable next to one.. unless it was my wife and read my mind, is a good story teller and implanted my deepest fantasies (with her creative ideas at story telling) into my brain during sex that would be so hot.
04/22/2009
Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
As pertaining to Rogue-- you would not believe how many smutty fan stories there are of her and -- insert name of ANYONE in the comicverse or otherwise -- floating on the interweb.

Psychic cushioning, latex bodysuits, Magneto magic...

I'm serious. Comic book nerds will do ANYTHING to let their favorite superheroes get it on.
04/22/2009
That Weird Guy That Weird Guy
I have never read a comic book. and I'm not a comic book nerd.. but I dig mystique so hardcore, purple is my favorite color and i have a thing for pointy ears.

What do you expect from us nerds... we don't get much action

I think elves are hot, LOTR has some epic elven pictures of liv tyler which is my all time favorite chick BTW. and even better that she played an elf, her pointy ears were somewhat weak though I prefer the long, thin, stretched and super pointy ones.

I have masturbated to my characters I create in my video games before.. age of conan has boobies in it if you take off your top... when I heard it had nudity the first thing I did when I got the game was make a female toon and take off her top LOL.. they are surprisingly detailed for a video game. but yeah i finished the tutorial in my panties and no top they even had some sexy emotes you could do where your char would rub her self laying down but they took it out i guess it was to sexual I think the game was rated poorly it should have been rated adult and not mature. Either way the game at least when I played it was horribly unbalanced at release...
04/22/2009
Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Cinnamon
As pertaining to Rogue-- you would not believe how many smutty fan stories there are of her and -- insert name of ANYONE in the comicverse or otherwise -- floating on the interweb.

Psychic cushioning, latex bodysuits, Magneto ...
I have seen a lot of those Rogue art/toon-porn/hentai style pictures, but I have never read any of the stories... I can only imagine.
04/23/2009
Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
I have seen a lot of those Rogue art/toon-porn/hentai style pictures, but I have never read any of the stories... I can only imagine.
Auuugh... toon porn destroys me. I'm used to the prettier hentai flicks, like Bible Black and Dark Shell. Have you ever been attacked by Flintstones toon porn? Traumatic!

@That Weird Guy: I... always thought Mystique was blue. I'm sure that are purple Twi'lek in the Star Wars verse for you to lust after, though. Comic books and science fiction have yet to fail in creating attractive mutants and aliens.
04/23/2009
Gary Gary
I have been thinking about this off and on all day... I love all of those fan pics you see online of super villains with the heroins of whichever cartoon or movie it is taken from. There should be pornographic art of Destro and the Baroness! Is there anyone who did not think the Baroness was hot? Is there anyone who did not wonder if Destro's penis was also chromed metal?
04/23/2009
Gary Gary
Quote:
Originally posted by Miss Cinnamon
Auuugh... toon porn destroys me. I'm used to the prettier hentai flicks, like Bible Black and Dark Shell. Have you ever been attacked by Flintstones toon porn? Traumatic!

@That Weird Guy: I... always thought Mystique was blue. I'm sure ...
Mystique is blue, but could change to be any color that she wanted.

Wilma is hot! I have a colored pencil drawing of Betty using a dildo on Wilma from behind, doggystyle, that I did when I was in high school. Strangely enough that has never before come up in conversation.
04/23/2009
Miss Cinnamon Miss Cinnamon
Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
Mystique is blue, but could change to be any color that she wanted.

Wilma is hot! I have a colored pencil drawing of Betty using a dildo on Wilma from behind, doggystyle, that I did when I was in high school. Strangely enough that has never ...
True enough... movie-verse Mystique will always be my favorite though. So ironic that Ian McKellen wasn't the type to be interested X]

Colored pencil drawings are one thing. Badly animated toon porn (*bonk* *bonk* *bonk*) is another.

I, for one, would like to see some Velma x Daphne (from Scooby Doo) action. I'm sure it's already out there somewhere. It just needs to find me.

And of course they're superheroes! They drive a hippie van and have a talking dog!
04/23/2009
That Weird Guy That Weird Guy
link i guess she is blue

If we are talking about Star wars.. well i LOVE Zabracks they come hot and horny (wink) when ever I play a star was game I go for the zabs first they are soooooooo hot.. Looking forward to playing a zab in the next SW MMORPG if the zabrack race is playable

twi'leks look funny to me when they are bald.. but I like them when they have a lekku wrap... would be my 3rd race of choice after zab then human..
04/23/2009
That Weird Guy That Weird Guy
bonk bonk bonk LMFAO!!!!!
04/23/2009
her.royal.redness her.royal.redness
Hmmm.. Xaiver.. Talk about a mind fuck.. *Lol*
05/20/2009
Total posts: 12
Unique posters: 4