Tell your funniest corny joke.

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Tell your funniest corny joke.

Nazaress Nazaress
There's a lot of different kinds of humor in the world and some jokes are hurtful to certain people. But what's less hurtful than a corny joke? Tell some of YOUR funniest corny jokes!

I'll start. "When does Friday come before Thursday?" ... "In the dictionary!"
03/21/2012
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pestilence pestilence
My great-grandfather was just full of these, though I can't remember too many off the top of my head (a large amount were biblical, and I never was too good with the bible).

The one I can remember: "There once was a dog named August. One day, August got hit by a car and died. His funeral was the next day - what day was the funeral held?"



"September 1st, for it was the end of August."



I remember this so well because my grandma would tell it every September and reminisce about her father.
03/22/2012
slynch slynch
A man was hospitalized with six plastic horses up his ass.

The doctors described his condition as "stable"
03/22/2012
Beck Beck
This not mine but I thought it was pretty funny when hubby told it to me. It is out of Playboy.

A women tells her husband that the mailman is retiring and she would like to get him something special. The husband says "Fuck him."

The next day he comes home and finds his wife bent over with the mailman and he asks her, WTF? She looks at him and says "this was your idea."
03/22/2012
melissa1973 melissa1973
I heard this one.

The perfect man, the perfect woman, and Santa Clause were in a car wreck. Which one survived?

The perfect woman (of course) because the other two din't exist.
03/22/2012
Ghost Ghost
Our culture respects women.



That's the joke.
03/22/2012
tiggle biddies tiggle biddies
Quote:
Originally posted by slynch
A man was hospitalized with six plastic horses up his ass.

The doctors described his condition as "stable"
hahaha!
03/22/2012
Nazaress Nazaress
Quote:
Originally posted by Beck
This not mine but I thought it was pretty funny when hubby told it to me. It is out of Playboy.

A women tells her husband that the mailman is retiring and she would like to get him something special. The husband says "Fuck him." ...
Lol! So funny.

@ melissa1973: That's hilarious!
03/22/2012
married with children married with children
A man sits down at the bar. The woman sitting next to him leans over and says "its your lucky day, I will do anything you want for $300. The only catch is you have to request it with only using 3 words". The man says ok and hands her $300. He thinks for a min, and then very slowly says "paint my house".
03/24/2012
Dreaus Dreaus
Two fish swim into a concrete wall, one turns to the other and says "Dam"!
03/24/2012
Alyxx Alyxx
Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he would like a drink. Rene Descartes says, "I think not" and ceased to exist. It's terrible, I know. One of my high school teachers told it in class.
03/24/2012
Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
1) How do you see through a brick wall? ... Install a window!
(I used to think this one was hilarious when I was a kid.)

2) A piece of string walks into a bar, and the bartender tells him to get lost. So the string goes outside, ties himself into a knot, and cuts up his ends until they're completely frayed before going back into the bar. The bartender asks, "Weren't you just in here?" The string replies, "'Fraid not."
03/24/2012
Rin (aka Nire) Rin (aka Nire)
Quote:
Originally posted by married with children
A man sits down at the bar. The woman sitting next to him leans over and says "its your lucky day, I will do anything you want for $300. The only catch is you have to request it with only using 3 words". The man says ok and hands her ...
This is why it's not always a good idea to get your money upfront!
03/24/2012
Total posts: 13
Unique posters: 11