Of course they swear by it, it works for them. And those it didn't work for will most likely tell you to run for the hills if the suggestion is made.
Been there, done that. I don't and will never trust anyone enough to allow them to get close to what my man and I share. It's just that simple. The open relationship was with him and someone we both thought we knew extremely well. To call it a clusterfuck is putting it mildly. It's also not a joke when I say that I am definitely emotionally scarred because of the experience.
Im just curious as Ive known a few people who do this... I don't think I ever could, but the few people I know swear by it..
Up until recently I was in an open relationship, I'd say it was for about 10 years, maybe more? I'm 23 (it started with the cute "lets hold hands" relationships) and up until my current relationship I very much enjoyed it. There were no issues with jealousy because in these relationships you learn to manage your time, and everyone was happy. But, my current boyfriend doesn't like to share, which is fine by me, because I am very happy with the way things are
Also been there, done that. Relationship involved myself, my boyfriend and a girlfriend. It got kinda weird as my girlfriend fell in love with me and wanted us to live together, including her boyfriend who was actually a cover for her sexual identity (poor guy). We never did live together but the drama and the emotions were overwhelming, esp. when I said, I will always have a man in my life.
I was totally drained, exhausted and frustrated by the experience.
Will I ever be with a women again? Probably....but no way with all this drama and intensity.
I was in a poly relationship with a married couple. It worked out okay at the time but didn't last, and it wasn't something I would have carried on long term. It was very enjoyable at the time as the wife and I were good friends, and she was a very femme/caretaking kind which I love.
I highly doubt I'd do it again, but like I've learned through the years...never say never!
i've had a couple and i'm a little bit too much on the jealous side and kind of lazy (it takes hard working people to do that!). but i know some very happy people who have open relationships so it works out differently for everyone.
The majority of my relationships have been open, and my partners and I felt comfortable and loved, and everything worked fine as long as everyone was honest with him/herself, and each other.
There was one man who got his feelings hurt, and I'm still not sure whether I should blame myself or not---he told me that he was okay with everything, repeatedly, but I could see that he was trying to fool himself. I let him be his own judge about when to leave, but he definitely tried to convince himself that he was okay for much longer than was necessary, and he wound up quite hurt. I feel really badly about the whole situation with him.
But for the other partners over the years---basically if you have the capacity to be honest with yourself, and you are a)not instinctively very jealous and b)able to discuss and work through any jealousy that does crop up in spite of your usual nature---lovely and enjoyable.