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jlc8265 jlc8265
MY ex cheated on me should I take her back?
12/07/2010
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PassionQT PassionQT
Quote:
Originally posted by jlc8265
MY ex cheated on me should I take her back?
Do you WANT her back? Only you can answer that. I wouldn't take her back.
12/07/2010
firekitten firekitten
Depends. Can you rebuild that trust? Was it a one time deal or was it on going? This is one of those things you need to work out together.
12/07/2010
Muddog7998 Muddog7998
If you take her back, it will take a while to build the trust back. It can be done, but it's gonna be hard. I agree with Passion, it's up to whether or not you want her back. Not what everyone on here says, YOU. Trust me, I made one big mistake awhile ago because I didn't do what I thought was right, I let others decide for me. If you just let others dictate your life, you may not regret it now, but you will in the future.
12/07/2010
Viktor Vysheslav Malkin Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
Quote:
Originally posted by PassionQT
Do you WANT her back? Only you can answer that. I wouldn't take her back.
Booyah! I think you have it here. It is only up to you!
12/07/2010
Hallmar82 Hallmar82
That's a difficult question to answer. Both of you have to really want it - and work really hard. The memories will not fade easily. It's a hard decision that only you can make, and it's one you'll have to make every day, over and over. If you don't think you can live with that level of determination, then don't do it. It wouldn't be fair to either of you...
12/07/2010
Harlequin Harlequin
never take back a cheater. once that trust is gone its impossible to get back.
12/08/2010
J's Alley J's Alley
Quote:
Originally posted by Harlequin
never take back a cheater. once that trust is gone its impossible to get back.
That's not really true. Some people can isolate what the issues were in the first place and rectify them. My sister was able to do that in her marriage. Cheating is not so much about sex as it is about underlying issues (usually).

As everyone else has said, this is not something anyone else can help you decide. It is based on what YOU want and what SHE wants.
12/08/2010
Lucidity Lucidity
I think it depends on the situation as well as your relationship. This isn't a yes or no question that strangers can just answer.
12/09/2010
ToyGeek ToyGeek
There are as many answers to this question as there are people on this planet. Did she cheat once, or was it an ongoing affair? Did she cheat with someone she knew, or with a stranger? Were there multiple affairs? Is she sorry? Was there a tangled web of lying, or a one night mistake followed by a confession?

You said ex -- so how long have you been apart? Do you miss her? Do you love her? Is this relationship worth risking getting hurt? Are there other factors involved, like children?

Tell us more if you want more guidance here, but ultimately this is your decision.
12/09/2010
Lady Venus Lady Venus
Two wrongs don't make a right.
12/09/2010
Bunnycups Bunnycups
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyGeek
There are as many answers to this question as there are people on this planet. Did she cheat once, or was it an ongoing affair? Did she cheat with someone she knew, or with a stranger? Were there multiple affairs? Is she sorry? Was there a ...
Yeah, I think if I knew more about the situation it would be easier to answer. Just knowing that she cheated and only that all I can think is, fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me.
12/09/2010
mariah mariah
no.
12/11/2010
married with children married with children
Quote:
Originally posted by jlc8265
MY ex cheated on me should I take her back?
once a cheater, always a cheater. No, i would not take anybody back who cheated on me
12/11/2010
mariah mariah
Quote:
Originally posted by married with children
once a cheater, always a cheater. No, i would not take anybody back who cheated on me
i don't allways belive that. but i guess once someone cheats on someone they will do it again to that same person. but maybe when they find someone new they wont cheat. but when its the same person they will
12/11/2010
KnK KnK
Quote:
Originally posted by Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
Booyah! I think you have it here. It is only up to you!
I agree wholeheartedly.
12/11/2010
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by Harlequin
never take back a cheater. once that trust is gone its impossible to get back.
Not true but it takes a person who is willing to do the hard work to be trust worthy again. I have forgiven my cheater and I do trust him again, it IS possible.
YOu have to be totally committed to working out the deep issues that caused the cheating and willing to put in the hard work. Sometimes it's just not worth it.
12/11/2010
Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Quote:
Originally posted by mariah
i don't allways belive that. but i guess once someone cheats on someone they will do it again to that same person. but maybe when they find someone new they wont cheat. but when its the same person they will
Most serial cheaters will cheat regardless of who they are with. The cheater needs to work on WHY they are cheating and deal with the problem. It isn't true to say cheaters always cheat, but they have done it before and it gets easier to justify the behavior not harder.
12/11/2010
Porfiriato Porfiriato
I'm surprised by the number of people asking these types of questions on online forums. It's never an easy yes or no question, it always depends on the situation. Since we do not know the whole story, it's very hard to give a meaningful response.

But I do think that there have been some good responses-that cheating is a clear violation of trust, and that it will take quite a bit of work to regain that trust and repair the relationship. It all depends on if both parties are willing to put in that kind of effort.
12/11/2010
mrs.mckrakn mrs.mckrakn
Quote:
Originally posted by jlc8265
MY ex cheated on me should I take her back?
Gosh no
04/16/2011
Retro Retro
Quote:
Originally posted by jlc8265
MY ex cheated on me should I take her back?
everyone who has answered has made some very good points. First, why did she cheat? Is it something you two need to work on like problems or lack of time together? Do you both want the same things? Are you really compatible? There are a lot of questions that can be asked so it really depends why she cheated, if there was a reason. If you are having the thought of getting back with her then you to should sit down and talk calmly. No fighting or yelling. This can be very hard to do but also very beneficial at solving a problem instead of adding to it. Best of luck.
04/16/2011
Total posts: 21
Unique posters: 19