Would you buy your daughter a vibrator?

Contributor: Amber1319 Amber1319
Quote:
Originally posted by vanilla&chocolate
I'm 19, and pretty far from having kids, but lately I've been thinking about this. I would never have asked my mom for a vibrator even though I really wanted one, so when I was 18 I simply went to the local sex shop and got one. Before that, ... more
I wouldn't be against it but I think it would be a little awkward. If she wants to.get one on her own that's fine.
06/25/2012
Contributor: MidnightStorm MidnightStorm
I can't really say... My mom was fine with me buying vibrators, but she never would've bought me one, I think. It took a long time for us to talk about it!
06/25/2012
Contributor: Rosen Rot Rosen Rot
I would probably buy my future daughter one for her 16th birthday. Just set it on her bed when she it at school. Let her figure out if she wants to use it or not.
Better than going out and having unprotected sex.
06/25/2012
Contributor: Sinfully Sinfully
Not sure. I def wouldn't be opposed. I don't have any kids though. I just don't know.
06/25/2012
Contributor: ichwillwaffels ichwillwaffels
Quote:
Originally posted by vanilla&chocolate
I'm 19, and pretty far from having kids, but lately I've been thinking about this. I would never have asked my mom for a vibrator even though I really wanted one, so when I was 18 I simply went to the local sex shop and got one. Before that, ... more
If my daughter talked to me about sex and it seemed like something that may help then I would be willing to get her one. It would be a healthier way to explore things than the way some girls end up grabbing random items around the house.
06/26/2012
Contributor: ginainohio ginainohio
im not sure i would
07/30/2012
Contributor: AK Bunny AK Bunny
Quote:
Originally posted by vanilla&chocolate
I'm 19, and pretty far from having kids, but lately I've been thinking about this. I would never have asked my mom for a vibrator even though I really wanted one, so when I was 18 I simply went to the local sex shop and got one. Before that, ... more
I would like to be totally open and honest about that stuff with my kids, but I guess we'll see when I get there. At this point I would be willing to.
07/31/2012
Contributor: eeep eeep
I think it would totally depend on the personality of my kid if I would do that or not.
07/31/2012
Contributor: Pururin Pururin
If I had a daughter I probably wouldn't buy her any. However, I wouldn't discourage her from buying one if she wanted.
I think it's important for women to discover their bodies with their hands first and then buy their own toys when they're ready.

However, my friend was telling me how her boss gave her teenaged daughter some money and told her to go buy herself a vibe with it and that she wanted to see what she bought. Apparently the girl's mother liked it so much she asked her daughter to buy her one as well. It got pretty awkward from what I understand.
07/31/2012
Contributor: freshbananas freshbananas
Quote:
Originally posted by vanilla&chocolate
I'm 19, and pretty far from having kids, but lately I've been thinking about this. I would never have asked my mom for a vibrator even though I really wanted one, so when I was 18 I simply went to the local sex shop and got one. Before that, ... more
I bought my sister an ohmibod
07/31/2012
Contributor: Itsnotabanana Itsnotabanana
yep, I would
07/31/2012
Contributor: HannahPanda HannahPanda
I might, but I would let my child come to me about it first. It rarely happens, but I'll have the sex talk and maybe then.
07/31/2012
Contributor: MissMori MissMori
I would, but I'm reading this as a general question - not based on age. So, if I ever have a daughter I wouldn't just get her one out of the blue when she was a teenager since that could make her really uncomfortable among other things, but if it came up at any point I'd be cool with it.

Also, my sister and I are pretty well past our teenage years but have brought up having "sex toy Christmas" for the ladies of the family.

Mom, on the off chance you're on this site and are reading this thread - WE WEREN'T KIDDING!
07/31/2012
Contributor: Lildrummrgurl7 Lildrummrgurl7
I wouldn't be opposed to it but it's not something I would just hand her out of the blue. If she asked or expressed interest in one, I would have no problem getting her one. It would also depend on her age and what not.
07/31/2012
Contributor: ArmyWife4311 ArmyWife4311
It depends on how close our relationship is. I don't have any children yet, but I'm pretty certain I don't want to imagine my daughter using what I just bought her. I will however, tell her that there are options like that and that it would be up to her to buy them on her own.
My husband would say, "That's a big HELL NO!!!" Hahah.
08/01/2012
Contributor: Scrawberry78 Scrawberry78
Right now I am not planing on having any more kids. I have a son. I would want to be open with my children about sex, toys and whatever else they want to know. So I would buy a toy for my daughter and have my sons father buy him a toy if he wanted one.
08/01/2012
Contributor: hot lil momma hot lil momma
No I wouldn't. Picking a toy, should she ever want one is a purely personal and private decision.
08/01/2012
Contributor: Katelyn Katelyn
I love the giftcard idea and the setting one on the nightstand or bed idea. These seem like discreet ways to not embarrass your child. I love the idea of leaving a simple note, like "see me with questions". These are wonderful ideas.
08/01/2012
Contributor: Nacht Stern Nacht Stern
I would have been embarrassed as hell if my parents gave my a toy. But I also was quite randy and could have blew off a lot of steam with it.

So I guess if I had a child I would give them 'The talk'. Then ask if there having any urges. The conversation would obviously get to TMI, and they would probably not say anything. Then I would leave them a prepaid card with a note in their room to go on the internet or a sex shop and get something.
08/01/2012
Contributor: giftdgecko giftdgecko
I'm really not sure as I don't have kids yet. But if she's old enough and mature enough I don't see a big reason not too
08/01/2012
Contributor: Martiniman Martiniman
I'm not sure, I think I'd need to be in the moment.
12/06/2012
Contributor: Intrepid Niddering Intrepid Niddering
I don't know. That's one of those, "I have to be in the situation," moments. I'd be willing to if I ever had children, though.

As for those believing it would dissuade the child from having sex.. I really don't think it would. Granted, I didn't have a toy, but I had my own makeshift toys and masturbated like crazy growing up... and I still had sex with people. They're completely different experiences.
12/06/2012
Contributor: LoooveMonkey LoooveMonkey
If I actually had a kid, yes, if she wanted.
12/06/2012
Contributor: xoxo xoxo
Definitely
12/06/2012
Contributor: Supervixen Supervixen
No, I wouldn't. That's not because I think there is anything wrong with toys (obviously, and I'm no hypocrite), and not because I wouldn't be able to handle the inevitable maturation of my child into adulthood. I believe in boundaries between parents and kids, and like P'Gell said, your kids are not your friends. I knew kids with parents who were "cool" and who would hang out with us and drink and smoke while we were in high school...those friends of mine didn't need that; they needed responsible adults who cared about them, who would protect them, and who they could look up to and respect.

Don't misunderstand me; I would talk openly and honestly with my daughter about sex, including masturbation and toys, and I don't think there is anything disrespectful about about using toys (again, I'm no hypocrite). But it's my role as a parent to talk, to teach, to advise, but also to step back and let my kids mature on their own and discover their personal, private selves outside of the context of me. There's something about the passing of childhood into adulthood that is private and personal, and does not involve your parents. There are boundaries between parents and children, and there should be.

I don't buy the argument that if you don't buy your daughter a vibrator then she'll go out and fuck anyone who offers themselves. That makes NO SENSE. Sex toys are not substitutes for sexual contact with another human being; one involves inanimate objects and the other involves another person. That also suggests that sex toys are the only satisfying way to masturbate (it's not for everyone; I much more prefer my fingers to toys), and that it will "hold her over" until she's presumably ready for sex with another person. Why? Does masturbation compare to human sexual contact? Is the only reason that a person has sex is to get off? Is sex really so simple? Is there any correlation between masturbation style, promiscuity, or more importantly, responsible sexual health?

Sorry, it just bugs me...I know, we're all sex positive here, and that's great, but sex positive doesn't mean anything goes, in my opinion. Just like you can damage a child by encouraging sexual repression, you can also damage a kid by raising them while being far too actively involved in their sexual development. You can be positive, open, honest and supportive without getting too involved in your child's sex life.

That's what I think, anyway.
12/07/2012
Contributor: DomonCoshu DomonCoshu
Yeah I would its just a different age. That and hopefully it would keep her away from guys for a little while.
12/07/2012
Contributor: Vaginas Vaginas
I totally would. when I deemed her old enough. it's healthy to explore your body. and you get to know yourself. plus it's the safest way to have fun at a young age because you are not having sex. there's no risk of stds or pregnancy with a vibe.
12/07/2012
Contributor: Girly Juice Girly Juice
I would show her a local feminist sex shop, come in with her only if she wanted me to, and buy her a toy if she found one she wanted. I wouldn't force it on her, though.
12/07/2012
Contributor: Laurinnichole Laurinnichole
I would. Would rather have my daughter using a vibrator where I know she won't get a std or get pregnant. Not to mention mental damage if the guy is just using her for sex.
12/07/2012
Contributor: Supervixen Supervixen
Again, I don't get why people assume that if you use a vibrator, then that means you aren't having sex.
12/07/2012