Getting started with BDSM - tips?

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Getting started with BDSM - tips?

indiechick indiechick
If you were to give someone 5-10 Basics for getting started what would they be and why?
05/01/2012
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Vegan Silk Vegan Silk
getting started? Do you mean with sex toys? reviewing sex toys? Sex? I don't understand the question...
05/01/2012
BloodHound BloodHound
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
If you were to give someone 5-10 Basics for getting started what would they be and why?
Numbering doesn't denote importance.

1. start slow
2. educate yourself about things you may want to try
3. keep an open line of communication between you and your partner.
4. talk to other people about their experiences and for advice
5. get involved with a local kink community
05/02/2012
Bex1331 Bex1331
Quote:
Originally posted by Vegan Silk
getting started? Do you mean with sex toys? reviewing sex toys? Sex? I don't understand the question...
getting started with BDSM she means... it was the name of the discussion...
05/02/2012
charletnarouh charletnarouh
1. Be very honest with yourself and your partner about your wants, needs and expectations and communicate, communicate, communicate
2. Make safety your top concern
3. Read and educate yourself
4. Realize that most of what you find online will be shit
5. Seek out your local community of real, live, practicing kinksters or do and live BDSM
6. Ask questions and reach out for help and mentoring, while remaining respectful
7. Realize that, for many, BDSM is a lifestyle as well as a form of play
05/07/2012
indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by Vegan Silk
getting started? Do you mean with sex toys? reviewing sex toys? Sex? I don't understand the question...
I mean read the post...with BDSM
05/09/2012
indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by charletnarouh
1. Be very honest with yourself and your partner about your wants, needs and expectations and communicate, communicate, communicate
2. Make safety your top concern
3. Read and educate yourself
4. Realize that most of what you find online ...
Thank you so much this was very helpful
05/09/2012
charletnarouh charletnarouh
Quote:
Originally posted by indiechick
Thank you so much this was very helpful
You're welcome. I hope you find what you need. I know that, for me, connecting with the community, by which I mean finding discussion groups and support groups, not community for play, but people who I could discuss the lifestyle and roles and help educate me and my partner was a huge relief. Seriously, I almost cried at the first meeting I was at, to hear people talking about what I wanted in my life and my sex life, to hear from and meet people who lived this way, it was so overwhelmingly amazing.
05/13/2012
palindromic palindromic
1. Be in touch with yourself and what you're comfortable with.
2. COMMUNICATE your comfort levels, desired activities, limits, etc. with whomever you might get involved with BDSM-wise.
3. Know that things change - roles, preferences, etc. - and that this is okay.
4. READ READ READ READ READ. There are forums, educational websites, books, and everything in between that cover BDSM basics - seek them out! But don't read them uncritically. Evaluate what you read and cross-reference.
5. Seek out your local kink community/communities. They often have classes for beginners. As always, be respectful, willing to learn, and firm in your comfort levels/limits.
6. If you're comfortable with porn, watching some BDSM stuff can help you figure out what kinds of activities you might be into. Of course, just like with #4, you want to be a critical evaluator of what you watch - not just a passive watcher.
05/13/2012
indiechick indiechick
Quote:
Originally posted by palindromic
1. Be in touch with yourself and what you're comfortable with.
2. COMMUNICATE your comfort levels, desired activities, limits, etc. with whomever you might get involved with BDSM-wise.
3. Know that things change - roles, preferences, etc. - ...
So helpful you all have been wonderful
05/15/2012
Total posts: 10
Unique posters: 6