Safe Words

Contributor: Airlia Airlia
For all those BDSM lovers, care to share safe words? My partner and I figured it's about time we needed one and we can't seem to find one that doesn't make us fall about in fits of giggles!
11/18/2008
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Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Well, we jokingly use "banana" but we haven't had anything serious enough to need a real safeword. I am partial to the red light, green light, yellow light system.
11/18/2008
Contributor: Nashville Nashville
How vanilla does this sound--- we heard their safe word on Desperate Housewives was Philadelphia.. We tried it and it works quite well for us, we're not big into BDSM or S&M so rarely do we need to rely on a safe word if we get into the thick of things.
11/18/2008
Contributor: Beautiful Dreamer Beautiful Dreamer
We use "Red" for our oral safe word. When one of us is gagged, we have a dog toy that fits around our wrist so we squeeze it as the safe "act". This particularly comes in hand when we're also using restraints, as you can't accidentally drop the toy.
11/18/2008
Contributor: Betty Rocket Betty Rocket
Peanut Butter here....
11/18/2008
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
My last one was "armadillo."
11/18/2008
Contributor: Dragon Dragon
There was a hilarious set of posts on that recently on Divamidori. It included one story about an agreement about the big grinning cat on tv. When one partner yelled "Garfield" and the other *later* asked why she didn't use her safeword thinking it was "Marmaduke..." Because they didn't remember the conversation the same way...
11/18/2008
Contributor: Airlia Airlia
Quote:
Originally posted by Backseat Boohoo
My last one was "armadillo."
lol!
11/19/2008
Contributor: Airlia Airlia
Quote:
Originally posted by Dragon
There was a hilarious set of posts on that recently on Divamidori. It included one story about an agreement about the big grinning cat on tv. When one partner yelled "Garfield" and the other *later* asked why she didn't use her ... more
Oh god, now that sounds like a nightmare just waiting to happen.
11/19/2008
Contributor: Airlia Airlia
Quote:
Originally posted by Beautiful Dreamer
We use "Red" for our oral safe word. When one of us is gagged, we have a dog toy that fits around our wrist so we squeeze it as the safe "act". This particularly comes in hand when we're also using restraints, as you can't ... more
Oh I should think about that - when I can't speak we revert to good ol' tapping. We tend to just know.
11/19/2008
Contributor: Airlia Airlia
Quote:
Originally posted by Nashville
How vanilla does this sound--- we heard their safe word on Desperate Housewives was Philadelphia.. We tried it and it works quite well for us, we're not big into BDSM or S&M so rarely do we need to rely on a safe word if we get into the thick ... more
It's not vanilla, it's funny! We heard poodle somewhere and stuck to it but now just laugh at it
11/19/2008
Contributor: Liz2 Liz2
"Red" works for me.
11/19/2008
Contributor: Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady Not Here Anymore f/k/a Happy Lady
"Pancakes" is the one I use - with everyone I ever need to tell. It's also quite effective to say it even if the other person has no idea why because it shocks them into stopping or pulling back.

Sure it's silly, but I need a silly word to find in my brain in times like that because my mouth tends to say all sorts of crazy things....
11/19/2008
Contributor: Firemeup Firemeup
My husband reads me very well so it's rarely necessary, but I put up my hand, with my palm towards him, as a safe act. (Safe words won't work because I lose the ability to speak under certain kinds of stress.) We've discussed getting a jingle bell or something for when he can't see my hands.
01/29/2009
Contributor: queertastic queertastic
My boyfriend was into martial arts for about 10 years and there is a "tap" system used when someone gives up a fight. When either one of us "taps" the bed, the other person --- whatever we can get our hands on, it instantly means playtime is over. This is the best thing that we've found that works for us. We had safe words set up but never used them...and tapping is so much easier in my mind than having to search for words when you're panicked.
03/19/2009
Contributor: Sammi Sammi
We are trying to come up with one as well. I like some of the ones above! I also like the idea of tapping - we are experimenting with gag usage in our play, and the tap would work well, I think.
03/19/2009
Contributor: Backseat Boohoo Backseat Boohoo
Quote:
Originally posted by Sammi
We are trying to come up with one as well. I like some of the ones above! I also like the idea of tapping - we are experimenting with gag usage in our play, and the tap would work well, I think.
I like to be choked a little once in a blue moon, and that's what I use tapping. Two quick taps on the arm means "let go."
03/20/2009
Contributor: lexical lexical
I like the "stoplight system". That's what me and my current partner use. "Yellow" if you want to slow down or lighten up on whatever's happening, "red" if you need to stop all together and discuss the situation.

Another idea that won't be too hilarious and random is to use your full name, middle name and all. I think that can be kind of sexy And you'll never forget your name, whereas you may forget some random word!
03/25/2009
Contributor: jedent jedent
Quote:
Originally posted by Airlia
It's not vanilla, it's funny! We heard poodle somewhere and stuck to it but now just laugh at it
"Poodle" was the safe word in the book and movie Choke by Chuck Palahniuk during the "rape" scene
03/26/2009
Contributor: All In All In
I use the stop light system for when a verbal safeword is needed. We also use a ball that I can drop when I'm gagged.

I've only had to use my safeword once and that was with a client. Overall, I've been pretty lucky and most people can read me fairly well.
03/27/2009
Contributor: TinyTease TinyTease
"Trollop" is one I like from a story I read. I think also, state names can work pretty well and don't seem too silly.
04/07/2009
Contributor: LadyAdderuss LadyAdderuss
We use yellow light red light and green light Our slaves use them plus We use them Our selfs
04/09/2009
Contributor: Boxers Over Briefs Boxers Over Briefs
I like to use safe categories rather than a single word. Presidents for stop, vice presidents for slow. "Spiro Agnew!"
04/22/2009
Contributor: Adriana Ravenlust Adriana Ravenlust
Quote:
Originally posted by Boxers Over Briefs
I like to use safe categories rather than a single word. Presidents for stop, vice presidents for slow. "Spiro Agnew!"
So.. what if you don't know your history?
04/22/2009
Contributor: Nickisonehere Nickisonehere
Agreed with lexical about the stoplight system.
05/04/2009
Contributor: Jessica Elizabeth Jessica Elizabeth
I typically use the stoplight system, but if it's a life shattering event I will use "teddy."
05/13/2009
Contributor: Red Red
With my husband, and with casual playpartners, it's all about the green yellow and red. I use green a lot cause I, for one, love knowing when "all is well". Those are more feedback words to me than safewords - I want them respected, of course, and will stop playing with anyone who doesn't respect them. And when I top I always suggest the G/Y/R system to whomever I'm topping.

My actual safewords, in order of severity, are "FAINTING", "VOMIT", "LAWSUIT"
05/14/2009
Contributor: Viv Viv
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
With my husband, and with casual playpartners, it's all about the green yellow and red. I use green a lot cause I, for one, love knowing when "all is well". Those are more feedback words to me than safewords - I want them respected, ... more
*laughing my butt off* I love "LAWSUIT" that's perfect.
05/14/2009
Contributor: LicentiouslyYours LicentiouslyYours
Quote:
Originally posted by Red
With my husband, and with casual playpartners, it's all about the green yellow and red. I use green a lot cause I, for one, love knowing when "all is well". Those are more feedback words to me than safewords - I want them respected, ... more
Those just might be the best safewords ever!
05/15/2009
Contributor: imp imp
LOL loving the "Lawsuit" one! We all use the standard stoplight ones mainly to check in. Am quite liking the idea of something obscure and completely screwed up like "poporn". I have a fetish for made up words hehe.
06/02/2009