Originally posted by
So, my boyfriend wants to try anal play, as do i, and i was curious to know your first experience and any suggestions on what to do and not to do.
Sunshine, when My Man and I were learning how to have anal sex we found that a few things made it not only easier for me, but VERY enjoyable.
1) LUBE LUBE LUBE LUBE. It's a given, don't try it without it. I like either Astroglide green cap (no glycerin) or Astroglide Anal Poppers.
2) I love something penetrating my vagina. DP is fantastic and feels amazing. Also, the familiar feeling of vaginal penetration makes many women feel more comfortable about starting the whole anal thing.
3) I usually have to have at least one good orgasm BEFORE we even start anal sex. It relaxes me, and gets me ready for more orgasms easily. If you are relaxed, everything is easier.
4) Go slowly. The first time we just tried penile anal penetration and not only did it hurt, but I cut it short because I just didn't like it. Also, I bled afterward (I didn't bleed the first time I had PIV sex!) and told My Man, "We won't be doing that anymore. I was bleeding." He looked disappointed, but sadly nodded and agreed if I didn't like it he wouldn't push it. Still, both of us decided we still wanted to try to make it work. (we are both VERY stubborn and usually don't give up on anything.) We figured out that GRADUALLY getting me used to something in my anus was the best route. We bought a butt plug, but I didn't like that either. So, he did what he did when he was teaching me to have PIV sex many years earlier, a lot of outer exploratory play, very shallow penetration with his finger, moving on to more than one, and eventually (after a few weeks of work) actual anal sex.