What do you regret more something you have done, or not doing something?

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What do you regret more something you have done, or not doing something?

Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
I asked this same question months ago and only one person answered. Since I think this is a decent topic, I thought I'd post it again and see if I can get some action going on the forum!

(I'll answer later, after some others do because I don't want to influence the responses)
Mar 1, 5:38 pm
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SaucyxGirl SaucyxGirl
My biggest regret is something that I didn't do. It involved not making a move on a male friend of mine. Years later I found out that he would have welcomed it
Mar 2, 2:48 am
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Wicked Wahine
I asked this same question months ago and only one person answered. Since I think this is a decent topic, I thought I'd post it again and see if I can get some action going on the forum!

(I'll answer later, after some others do because ...
Not doing, for sure. A million little things in life scream out "why didn't you....."? I temper that down by knowing I have a very good life and have accomplished a lot, but the one that really rubs me wrong is that I wanted "one more" degree in a completely different field and yet life, finances and work just didn't make it possible. Sure, I could go back now and try and do it, but I would never get to "field use" the knowledge and so wouldn't get a lot of satisfaction out of it. As far as things I have done, sure, there are some regrets. A word said here, an action at work I wish I had done different, but really nothing that amounts to much "regret". That, as always, is life! Every microsecond is a decision. You never know what the outcome of that right turn might have been instead of the left one you took! Might have stubbed your toe on the can with the millions of dollars of gold coins, or might have gotten smacked by an out of control semi! Regret just means you fail to know how much worse the "other" option might have been!
Mar 2, 9:19 am
edeneve edeneve
Quote:
Originally posted by Bignuf
Not doing, for sure. A million little things in life scream out "why didn't you....."? I temper that down by knowing I have a very good life and have accomplished a lot, but the one that really rubs me wrong is that I wanted "one ...
you made several good points, Bignuf.

do you like debating just for the sake of debate?
Mar 2, 7:32 pm
BlackOrchid BlackOrchid
Not doing, 100%. Sure there are things that I have done that I regret, but that feeling only lasts for so long. Whereas when it comes to regret for things I have not done, it's a constant "what if?".
Mar 2, 7:45 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by BlackOrchid
Not doing, 100%. Sure there are things that I have done that I regret, but that feeling only lasts for so long. Whereas when it comes to regret for things I have not done, it's a constant "what if?".
I agree with you BlackOrchid!

@Bignuf: Thanks for the in depth answer. I personally have so little I regret, but this comes down to one's personality and outlook. I am more of an in the moment person, or I try to be. Sure I think of the past and the future, but I want to focus on what I can enjoy while I can enjoy it and on things I have control over.
Mar 3, 1:53 am
Oriental husband and wife Oriental husband and wife
"Coulda , woulda, shoulda.

Anytime you say or think of one of these words, time to move on.
Mar 3, 11:14 pm
charmedtomeetyou charmedtomeetyou
I have some of each, and I'm not sure which side of that coin holds more weight.
Mar 4, 8:23 pm
edeneve edeneve
Quote:
Originally posted by BlackOrchid
Not doing, 100%. Sure there are things that I have done that I regret, but that feeling only lasts for so long. Whereas when it comes to regret for things I have not done, it's a constant "what if?".
I know, me too.
Mar 6, 1:35 pm
js250 js250
Both! My biggest regrets in my life are:
--Ignoring my husband's request to call him back when I was mad at him.
--Not getting back home an hour earlier the night he died.
Mar 31, 12:41 pm
Wicked Wahine Wicked Wahine
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Both! My biggest regrets in my life are:
--Ignoring my husband's request to call him back when I was mad at him.
--Not getting back home an hour earlier the night he died.
Oh, God that sucks! That is so tough and I wish I had reassuring words for you, but I think that is one of those things that you'll always wonder about, it's just human nature. As for the not calling back, that's understandable because you likely didn't want to say anything hurtful in the heat of your anger. And I worry that you getting home an hour earlier might have resulted in both of you dead and, despite what you may think now about that at least meaning you'd still be together, God has plans for you or you wouldn't still be here. You are a force of nature and you apparently are still needed. It may be cold comfort right now, but having a purpose in life, even not knowing exactly what that is specifically (though you know it's about helping others), is important.
Mar 31, 1:36 pm
edeneve edeneve
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Both! My biggest regrets in my life are:
--Ignoring my husband's request to call him back when I was mad at him.
--Not getting back home an hour earlier the night he died.
OMGawd. blaming yourself for your actions being "unforgivable" while grieving is normal. but please, please, find a way to be kinder to yourself.
Mar 31, 3:12 pm
PadoruLover PadoruLover
Depends on what it was. There are somethings I regret doing more then others I regret not doing. But mostly it is doing.
Mar 31, 11:44 pm
PadoruLover PadoruLover
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Both! My biggest regrets in my life are:
--Ignoring my husband's request to call him back when I was mad at him.
--Not getting back home an hour earlier the night he died.
Mar 31, 11:45 pm
Total posts: 14
Unique posters: 9