Mirror, mirror on the wall . . . who is the smallest, least intimidating butt plug of them all?

Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Plug of lust small
Related to: 
I am completely new to anal play. Well, at least I am almost completely new: I have been attempting to get started for a couple of weeks now since my husband has expressed interest in trying anal sex.

Sadly, however, I have had a difficult time using what many reviewers have deemed as the perfect beginner's butt plug. It seems as though I need something even smaller than the following, all of which I have tried and find either very difficult to insert and/or too uncomfortable to wear for even a short period of time (and, yes, I do use a thick anal lube and try to insert gently and slowly):

Tantus Little Flirt (seems too long for my comfort)

Tantus Ripple (the last bead is too thick in diameter and it also is too long for me to fully insert comfortably)

FunFactory Bootie (the bulged head makes it very painful to insert, even going slowly and gently, and I find it too filling to wear comfortably for long, once it is in)

I am very sad that I am not "progressing" in anal play. Are there any smaller butt plugs out there to help me ease into using -- and hopefully even enjoying -- my *beginner* plugs so that I can eventually work up to trying anal sex?

Ironically, my husband has also just started to experiment with anal play to massage his prostate and he has even been able to use our Nexus G-rider with no problem. I don't understand why I am still stuck at the *pre-beginner* stage!

Thanks for any advice! I appreciate it.
08/24/2010
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Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I am completely new to anal play. Well, at least I am almost completely new: I have been attempting to get started for a couple of weeks now since my husband has expressed interest in trying anal sex.

Sadly, however, I have had a difficult ... More
Oh, I forgot to ask if the small Plug of Lust should be easier to use than the Tantus Little Flirt, Tantus Small Ripple, and FunFactory Bootie! Any other suggestions would be most appreciated, too.
08/24/2010
Jimbo Jones Jimbo Jones
At that price, the Plug of Lust is tough to beat. If price is not an object, then I might go for the Fun Factory Bootie instead because I think the base is better for long term wear. Another consideration if price were no object would be the Bob pleasure object.
08/24/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Jimbo Jones
At that price, the Plug of Lust is tough to beat. If price is not an object, then I might go for the Fun Factory Bootie instead because I think the base is better for long term wear. Another consideration if price were no object would be the Bob ... More
I do have the Bootie by FunFactory and it is very nice. I love the flexibility and the plush feel of their silicone. However, even though the Bootie is considered to be a small plug, I still find it a bit too large for me right now.

Do you know of any smaller plugs than the Bootie? I am trying to find the tiniest of the tiny ones since I seem to have a more difficult time with this than the average beginner!

Thank you for your feedback! I love LELO, so I will eventually want to try the Bob!
08/24/2010
Kindred Kindred
I'm certainly no expert on butt plugs, but is it possible that your are tense and not relaxed enough?
08/24/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Kindred
I'm certainly no expert on butt plugs, but is it possible that your are tense and not relaxed enough?
Possibly, but even when I have had the plug in a while, trying to relax while just lounging around engaged in relaxing activities (like reading), I feel uncomfortably stretched and full and I just want to take it out. While the neck and the base of the Bootie is just right, the bulb of it seems to be too big and filling for me right now.

So, I was thinking that perhaps I would be able to wear an even tinier plug longer and eventually get past this feeling. I'll keep trying the plugs I have, but I will keep an eye out for an even smaller one. If anyone knows of one that is smaller than the Little Flirt, small Ripple, or Bootie, please let me know!
08/24/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
Oh, I forgot to ask if the small Plug of Lust should be easier to use than the Tantus Little Flirt, Tantus Small Ripple, and FunFactory Bootie! Any other suggestions would be most appreciated, too.
SS, I really love the Plug of Lust, I found it easier to use than even the "beginner" Crystal Cote silicone plug. (The Crystal Cote was just too pointy and hard when we were first experimenting with anal play, although before we got the Plug Der Lust we used it occasionally.)

I found a couple of things really help anal play progress. My Man "conditioned" me, similarly to when he taught me how to have PIV sex, decades earlier. He started with gentle fingering, no toys, just his hand and fingers lightly touching and eventually probing, all the while making sure I was happy and comfortable and eventually really aroused. This probably took a couple of weeks of just touching with minimal penetration. Then he started penetrating, little by little, until we tried the Crystal Cote....and I hated it. I ended up being able to take his penis before any toy, to be honest. His hand and fingers did the trick of training and relaxing me. this "Training" usually occurred during very heavy cunnilingus sessions, so we were both feeling very good and relaxed about the whole endeavor.

Also, we found if I orgasmed at least once or twice BEFORE attempting any anal penetration it was much easier. I was relaxed, and at that point, pretty much anything would have been OK with me. Also, being well lubed, as you know, is very important. (However, we found TOO much lube and things just get messy. You have to find the right amount and the right lube for you. I like the lube in about 1/4 to a half a vial of Astroglide Anal Shooters.) We also found that if I had the very familiar sensation of vaginal penetration DURING anal sex, it was not only easier, but I was more relaxed and aroused. We found double penetration is actually preferable for our needs to simple anal penetration alone. We usually use the Fun Factory Boss Lady for this, either still or with the vibration turned on, depending on what My Man and I are in the mood for. We've also tried anal sex with the Wahl Massager on my clit, and it is really a fun sensation. It takes about every hand on deck, but it is worth the work!

The first time we actually achieved anal intercourse, with no discomfort and a lot of arousal on both ends, he was so caring and sweet and encouraging. We had tried it once before (without enough conditioning and training) and it hurt, and I bled (I didn't even bleed the first time I had PIV sex) but this second time he just kept telling me how much he loved me, and how sweet it was and what a Good Girl I was and it was wonderful.

Now, we play this way frequently, and the plugs, at least for me, came after learning with fingers hands and penis.

Now, quite a while later, I still don't like large toys, taken anally, I prefer small ones, as I like the full feeling, but not too much stretch unless we're having actual sex. (although have no problem with his penis, there's a difference, at least to me, in living human flesh and even the best silicone) I actually like the small Plug of Lust or a set of beads during oral, but usually want them removed before I come, as that what works for me most of the time.

I, personally, never wear a butt plug unless we are having sex. I find the sensation TOO sexual and can't just sit around with something in my butt, but everyone is different, and you'll find what works for you.

Every body is different. Take it slowly. Stop if it hurts. Allow yourself to relax and enjoy the sensations, and most likely you will eventually achieve whatever level of anal play you and your partner desire.

Gentle hugs and good luck.
08/24/2010
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
P'Gell has some good advice.

I will add that when I was first starting out a vibe helped to relax my anus, no penetration just on the out side. Then move to fingers, I take this time to massage in the lube.

Remember to relax, maybe take a good hot bath/shower, then get comfy put on your favorite music or porn (if you like that) and don't forget to breath and relax your lower pelvic region. If it feels like you are tensing up try to push like you are having a B.M.

Take your time with this, I took two weeks before I was ready for a toy.

Hope this helps.
08/24/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
SS, I really love the Plug of Lust, I found it easier to use than even the "beginner" Crystal Cote silicone plug. (The Crystal Cote was just too pointy and hard when we were first experimenting with anal play, although before we got the ... More
P'Gell, Thank you so much for all the excellent advice and encouragement. I was beginning to think something was wrong with me and that I would never be able to get past this. I'm just going to quit worrying about the end result we are aiming for. I guess I'll get there when I get there!

Perhaps I should just quit worrying about the plugs and just do fingers for now. Oh, and I will look into the Astroglide Anal Shooters, too. I am not familiar with that. We currently have the cherry-flavored Anal Lube (from this site).
08/24/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
P'Gell has some good advice.

I will add that when I was first starting out a vibe helped to relax my anus, no penetration just on the out side. Then move to fingers, I take this time to massage in the lube.

Remember to relax, maybe ... More
Dwtim, Thank you for your advice. I will try "setting the mood" a bit better than I have been. And I will definitely try a vibe next time to try to relax more! Maybe I am just being too impatient.
08/24/2010
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
Dwtim, Thank you for your advice. I will try "setting the mood" a bit better than I have been. And I will definitely try a vibe next time to try to relax more! Maybe I am just being too impatient.
The best advice I received was not to rush it, take your time and enjoy the feelings.
08/24/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
P'Gell, Thank you so much for all the excellent advice and encouragement. I was beginning to think something was wrong with me and that I would never be able to get past this. I'm just going to quit worrying about the end result we are ... More
You're welcome. While some people can and do condition and train themselves for anal with plugs first, they don't work for everyone as a training tool.

Take is slowly, maybe stick to fingers and hands for now, (make sure he remembers WHICH finger went where, you don't want a finger to go from anus to vagina without cleansing) and enjoy what is going on and don't worry about how slow or fast your progress is.

Good luck and enjoy! Some people take months to get to actual anal intercourse, and some simply stick with less intense forms of anal play. It really up to you and your man.

08/25/2010
ScottA ScottA
I'd second the finger recommendation. If you haven't done much playing around the outside of the anus you might want to start there. Whereas the feelings from the genitals are pretty much automatically good (barring bad prior experiences), most people need to "learn to like" the sensations of anal play. Keep in mind this isn't "learn to like" in a brussels sprouts or smoking kind of way, but just to get used to the sensations and realize that they are pleasurable. From there what most people call "stretching" to fit a plug or toy is really learning to relax the anus and realizing that you can do that and not have an unpleasant accident.
08/25/2010
Annemarie Annemarie
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I am completely new to anal play. Well, at least I am almost completely new: I have been attempting to get started for a couple of weeks now since my husband has expressed interest in trying anal sex.

Sadly, however, I have had a difficult ... More
I've heard that the Pleasure Plug 1 (there's a PP1 and a PP2) is great. It's really small, and I believe Jul!a recently did a video review on it, saying that it was perfect for the absolute beginner, so you could check that out.

Also, the Tantus Slim is fairly small as well.

I second all the suggestions here, about relaxing and setting the mood and just going with it. Fingers help. Really.
08/25/2010
Victoria Victoria
I suggest the Happy Valley Pleasure #1 - it's finger-sized, 100% silicone, and a good price. Definitely a good beginner plug.

We also just got the new silicone Doc Johnson Platinum line plugs in, so they'll be going up on the site soon - the Platinum (silicone) plug called "The Lil End" is also really small. I did a video sneak peek on it that should be up soon.
08/25/2010
Rockin' Rockin'
This set is new, but if it starts getting carried here, these toys look like they would be good for beginners.
08/25/2010
Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
I would absolutely recommend more anal play - fingers, small dildos - and less plugs. A LOT of people never like plugs, never like that feeling of sitting there with something in 'em, feeling like they gotta poop it out.

Fingers, toys, light thrusting, those things will prep you for anal sex far better than plugs, for the most part, as anal sex isn't about just sitting around with a penis in your butt.
08/25/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Wow, I am so amazed, overwhelmed, and INCREDIBLY GRATEFUL for all of your advice -- every single one of you: Jimbo Jones, Kindred, P'Gell, Dwtim, ScottA, Annemarie, Victoria, Rockin' with a Cock in, and Carrie Ann (I hope I didn't leave anyone out). Each of you have offered very helpful advice and I am feeling so much more encouraged now! I will certainly look into all of your suggestions until I find something that works for me. Thank you all again so very much!
08/25/2010
Victoria Victoria
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
Wow, I am so amazed, overwhelmed, and INCREDIBLY GRATEFUL for all of your advice -- every single one of you: Jimbo Jones, Kindred, P'Gell, Dwtim, ScottA, Annemarie, Victoria, Rockin' with a Cock in, and Carrie Ann (I hope I didn't leave ... More
You are quite welcome!
08/25/2010
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
Wow, I am so amazed, overwhelmed, and INCREDIBLY GRATEFUL for all of your advice -- every single one of you: Jimbo Jones, Kindred, P'Gell, Dwtim, ScottA, Annemarie, Victoria, Rockin' with a Cock in, and Carrie Ann (I hope I didn't leave ... More
Any time, that is why we are here.
08/25/2010
P'Gell P'Gell
You are welcome, any time, SS. Everybody here is usually pretty friendly and helpful and we WANT you to love and lust more and more.

Carrie Ann's for the most part, as anal sex isn't about just sitting around with a penis in your butt. made me laugh out loud. So true. Come to think of it (and I hadn't really before) not many people "train" for PIV sex while sitting around with a dildo in their vagina. (Although some of us use exercise balls, it's usually after years of PIV sex, having children etc.)

While plugs do tend to work for some people, and some people LOVE them, even for daily wear, they are not du ri gour for learning to love anal love.
08/25/2010
Rockin' Rockin'
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
Wow, I am so amazed, overwhelmed, and INCREDIBLY GRATEFUL for all of your advice -- every single one of you: Jimbo Jones, Kindred, P'Gell, Dwtim, ScottA, Annemarie, Victoria, Rockin' with a Cock in, and Carrie Ann (I hope I didn't leave ... More
Aww, you're quite welcome. I think Carrie Ann has the right idea, though. If you don't like plugs, don't force yourself to try to like them.

The little toys I suggested are supposed to be used with a finger in the base at all times, so they might work for slow motions at first.
08/25/2010
Kindred Kindred
While I can't take any credit for helping you, this thread is a beautiful example of what I've observed in the short time I've been on EF, a very caring and supportive community ready to jump at an opportunity to help each other. There is some wonderful advice here. Good luck!
08/25/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
08/25/2010
Selective Sensualist Selective Sensualist
Quote:
Originally posted by Jimbo Jones
At that price, the Plug of Lust is tough to beat. If price is not an object, then I might go for the Fun Factory Bootie instead because I think the base is better for long term wear. Another consideration if price were no object would be the Bob ... More
I just received the Lelo Bob today in the mail after ordering it for my husband. I sterilized it and got it ready for its "maiden voyage" when he got home from work. However, when he got home, he convinced me to try it instead. For some reason, this toy seems to work the easiest for me out of all the toys we've tried: the Tantus Ripple Small, the Tantus Little Flirt, and the FunFactory Bootie. It's a good thing there are so many shapes out there to try! This one seems to be my fit (and I never would have thought it would be until I saw it -- it is so very slim and non-threatening).

Now I want to order the Happy Valley Pleasure #1 that was recommended to me by a couple of other people!

Thanks again, everyone, for all the advice!
09/10/2010
Not here Not here
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I just received the Lelo Bob today in the mail after ordering it for my husband. I sterilized it and got it ready for its "maiden voyage" when he got home from work. However, when he got home, he convinced me to try it instead. For some ... More
Glad you found something that works for you.

Another recommendation I have for getting you more in the mood for anal play is to try rimming.. not everyone likes it, but I have to say- the one thing that gets me totally ready for anal is his tongue. It works way better for me than fingers, although a combination of the two is great, also- because the tongue is obviously a lot more soft and pliable, and he can begin to penetrate you with his tongue to get your anus relaxed, and ready for play..

Hope this helps!
09/10/2010
Cookie Monster Mike Cookie Monster Mike
This has been a good read and i've learned a lot from it. I do sometimes feel this way also. Sometimes i can enjoy anal play with no problems, whether a plug or dildo/vibe. However sometimes i cannot do it. Personally, i feel its something to with the muscles. Not sure how, but that's the way it feels for me. Like somehow they just won't co-operate the way you would like.

Ive never used a thick based lube for anal play, i enjoy Maximus Water based lube, i find its the most comfortable and easy to use. Reading on, glad you found a toy to work out for you. Hope you can work your way up to more adventures in the anal play. goodluck to you
05/15/2011
ToyBoy ToyBoy
Quote:
Originally posted by Selective Sensualist
I am completely new to anal play. Well, at least I am almost completely new: I have been attempting to get started for a couple of weeks now since my husband has expressed interest in trying anal sex.

Sadly, however, I have had a difficult ... More
The tantus slim was my first toy. It is slim, but also smooth and tapered, so it is super easy to insert
05/19/2011
Dawn (Lilac Distraction) Dawn (Lilac Distraction)
I thought I was a super beginner and ended up comfortably inserting an average sided dildo the other day.
05/23/2011
Misfit Momma Misfit Momma
Quote:
Originally posted by Rockin'
This set is new, but if it starts getting carried here, these toys look like they would be good for beginners.
I know this is an older thread, but I second these as a good place to start. They are not meant to be left inserted since you are supposed to keep a finger in them to keep them from slipping in. You can also squeeze a bullet into the finger hole, which is what I did with them.

I've moved on to bigger toys now, but I still really like these!
05/23/2011
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