Originally posted by
no, you're not a downer. btw, there are average size people out there that like their lover a bit more on the meaty side. aw, you probably already know that. guess I'm just reminding you.
Trust me, I really do need the reminders because I never believed it. I really thought that people were lying and either trying to be nice, or that they couldn't possible understand what I meant. Sure, there are always people into something, no matter what, but that does not mean I would take whatever I could get, do you know what I mean? I want to actually be attracted to whomever I get involved with and not just a little.; I want to be desperate to jump their bones, lol! I waited until I had that to lose my virginity (and in the meantime I did other things, just no PIV sex). But by waiting until I was bowled over with chemistry, I had the best experience possible! I only regret not having met him earlier. but since then I have been through a lot physically due to medicines and my health, so I look very different and until I started antidepressants this winter, I had a totally different take on my body image, etc. Now, i know i am not huge and even though overweight, I don't really care, not like I did before where it was a constant stream of negativity in my head, all day every day. Anyway, I guess I still have 40 years of conditioning to break from (I put myself on my first diet at 7, but the negative dysmorphia started before that and it's always just been a part of me ...until this one medicine changed everything)! So, yes, hearing and reinforcing the positive is important for me, thanks!
BTW, I have never cared about other's bodies and weight and have accepted all of them. Isn't that weird? I only had the harsh judgement for myself, not others.
@ OH&W, LOL, of course you didn't see the aftermath, that's in a special pay per view for those who like to see gaping holes. They wouldn't give it away without grabbing the chance to earn extra money, lol! But really, you know you don't have to go to that extreme! You already use plugs and anal toys, so you should enjoy pegging with similarly sized items, no problem. Though I can see how that scene might have killed it or you, hahaha.
BTW, I am easily bored and desensitized to porn. I do much better with build up and tension, plus a story line, so I am a big smut reader. For some reason, erotica has never gotten old for me as long as it has a good story. But porn is best as an occasional thing for me. I need to be turned on before I see porn because usually, if I am not, I will never get turned on.