#Eden-O-lympics - Let the Games Begin!

Ansley Ansley


The XXX Summer Olympics in London are well underway and the medals are impressive for China, the United States and Great Britain. If you're in the United States, you've seen a tremendous amount of volleyball - both beach and indoor, as well as an astronomical amount of water polo and swimmming. This is all well and good, but it got us to thinking what would an Eden Olympics look like?



Put away the day to day grind and pull out your thinking caps! Suspension of disbelief is a necessity in order to have some fun with this post and I think you are all very fun people and that you will enjoy this immensely.

Here are a few things to keep in mind when building your responses:

- There is no such thing as a sexually transmitted disease or infection in this world.

- Everyone in the world wants to see these events live and they're paying top dollar to watch the "athletes" compete.

- No one can get pregnant or get anyone else pregnant and the messier side of sexual relations is cleverly dealt with so it's a non-issue.

- You can choose adult stars for your team and teams will be based on sexual preferences.


Ok, got it?

Now, take the games of the current XXX Olympics and design a sexual version of the event. Who would be on your team, what would your routine or competition look like and what would the criteria for scoring be? How would toys be involved?

We will be super impressed by events that involve running or other motions that you don't normally associate with sex. What's the craziest event you can come up with?


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08/06/2012
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Airen Wolf Airen Wolf
Wow! What an idea....ok I need to dig out my thinking cap to answer this one. I'll have to get back with you all after some "research"!
08/06/2012
js250 js250
Oh, yeah!!! Is there going to be a vote and winner or is this creative fun?
08/06/2012
Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
LOL! What a fun idea. The idea that sprang immediately to my mind is a sexed up version of equestrian vaulting. If you don't know what that is, it is basically performing acrobatic routines on top of a cantering horse. There is solo vaulting, pairs vaulting and team vaulting. Sadly, vaulting is not actually an Olympic event, yet. However, there are petitions in place to add it to the Olympics. So for this thought experiment, let's pretend that it is already an Olympic sport.

So... imagine the solo vaulting competitors getting themselves off in the most athletic and artistic ways possible. Pair vaulting could be either same sex or opposite sex couples, and you can imagine all the different positions that they could employ throughout their routine. Team vaulting? Oh the possibilities!

Scoring would be based on athleticism, endurance and artistry. Oh what I wouldn't give to actually be a spectator (or even better, a judge) for such an event.
08/06/2012
dv8 dv8
Weightlifting would involve weights attached to a Kegelcisor.

Instead of the shotput, see how far a woman could shoot out a ping pong ball from your orifice of choice. Similarly, have competitions for the farthest ejaculation and squirting.

If you like running, hold the relay races with the batons held anally and passed anally from runner to runner.

Of course, wrestling would be naked and have the loser fucked by the winner but kink.com already does that.
08/06/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Ivy Wilde
LOL! What a fun idea. The idea that sprang immediately to my mind is a sexed up version of equestrian vaulting. If you don't know what that is, it is basically performing acrobatic routines on top of a cantering horse. There is solo vaulting, ... More
Nice! Equestrian vaulting is stunning by all accounts and I can only imagine what would it look like in all of our naked human glory.
08/06/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by Airen Wolf
Wow! What an idea....ok I need to dig out my thinking cap to answer this one. I'll have to get back with you all after some "research"!
I'm holding you to that!
08/06/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by js250
Oh, yeah!!! Is there going to be a vote and winner or is this creative fun?
This is just for creative fun.
08/06/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by dv8
Weightlifting would involve weights attached to a Kegelcisor.

Instead of the shotput, see how far a woman could shoot out a ping pong ball from your orifice of choice. Similarly, have competitions for the farthest ejaculation and ... More
All of those would be interesting!!! The batons reminds me of a certain scene or three in Anne Rice's Beauty series.
08/06/2012
Ansley Ansley
I think instead of synchronized swimming, I'd want to see synchronized fucking. Instead of it being in the water, I'd want to see it on the floor used for gymnastics.

Penalties would be for things like slipping out, early ejaculation, awkward movements or transitions into the next position. Degrees of difficulty would be based on which positions they've chosen out of the Kama Sutra, value weighted by the judges committee.

Another fun one would be to have a dildo mounted to the pommel horse and the routine has to include several successful penetrations from things like handstands, flips, and jumps.
08/06/2012
playsalot playsalot
How about fastest orgasm, with teams. Furthest squirter male and female. Sexiest displays of intercourse. Who can take the biggest toy.
08/06/2012
dv8 dv8
I'd be wary of any equestrian events in a sexual olympics.
08/07/2012
laflauta laflauta
Tug-of-war with nipple clamps. It's not related to any current Olympic events, but it's definitely sexual. The event could be done individually or with teams. The competitors would have to be strong and have a very high pain tolerance.
08/07/2012
Rin Rin Rin Rin
Quote:
Originally posted by dv8
Weightlifting would involve weights attached to a Kegelcisor.

Instead of the shotput, see how far a woman could shoot out a ping pong ball from your orifice of choice. Similarly, have competitions for the farthest ejaculation and ... More
Fucked by the winner indeed. That would always make it a win-win situation.
08/08/2012
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Well now, we certainly need an Fencing event. Of course Carrie Ann would be the judge as we would use cherry scented double dongs as the weapon of choice. I think this game would be played while laying on our backs and the object would be to stab your opponent in an orifice while defending your own orifice.
08/08/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Well now, we certainly need an Fencing event. Of course Carrie Ann would be the judge as we would use cherry scented double dongs as the weapon of choice. I think this game would be played while laying on our backs and the object would be to stab ... More
Sounds pretty brutal, if I recall correctly that dong wasn't anything to sneeze at.

Oh, silly us! What if stripping were an Olympic event? I've heard chatter about it in the past and can't say that I agree with it being added officially, but there are other competitions that shouldn't be Olympic events, why not go for broke with a pole dancing competition?
08/08/2012
Brittany Seydel Brittany Seydel
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley


The XXX Summer Olympics in London are well underway and the medals are impressive for China, the United States and Great Britain. If you're in the United States, you've seen a tremendous amount of volleyball - both beach and indoor, ... More
oh my!
08/08/2012
AlianneCimorene AlianneCimorene
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley


The XXX Summer Olympics in London are well underway and the medals are impressive for China, the United States and Great Britain. If you're in the United States, you've seen a tremendous amount of volleyball - both beach and indoor, ... More
Oh crap... I'm bad at sports. Hmmmm... What's something I could win at?
We could have some kind of endurance competition? Like, longest marathon session of masturbation (for solo players) and/or sex (for the couples or group side of it)! Extra points for positions, technique, number of orgasms, creative use of 'equipment', etc.? Penalties for trying to cheat by loss of enthusiasm, any attempt to fake it, and boring O-faces. Or for the solo side, last person to collapse in exhaustion wins?
08/08/2012
NorthBayLady NorthBayLady
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley


The XXX Summer Olympics in London are well underway and the medals are impressive for China, the United States and Great Britain. If you're in the United States, you've seen a tremendous amount of volleyball - both beach and indoor, ... More
I wouldn't know, I am not that experienced in sex. I was 24 when I finally had sex, can't seem to find someone who wants a relationship anymore
08/08/2012
SneakersAndPearls SneakersAndPearls
Hmm. Seeing how long a woman could help a man maintain his erection without actual penetration? That could be of interest.
08/08/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by AlianneCimorene
Oh crap... I'm bad at sports. Hmmmm... What's something I could win at?
We could have some kind of endurance competition? Like, longest marathon session of masturbation (for solo players) and/or sex (for the couples or group side of it)! ... More
OH I love it!!! There is something like this in existence - Masturbate-a-thon. They help raise money for sexual health initiatives and work to dispel the stigma and shame that comes with masturbating.
08/08/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by NorthBayLady
I wouldn't know, I am not that experienced in sex. I was 24 when I finally had sex, can't seem to find someone who wants a relationship anymore
I've heard that a lot these days. Everyone wants casual sex and not that that's a bad thing, but if you want more it can be hard to find someone who is committed to being committed.
08/08/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by SneakersAndPearls
Hmm. Seeing how long a woman could help a man maintain his erection without actual penetration? That could be of interest.
That would be fun! They'd have to be tested for viagra or other sexual aids before they compete, though.
08/08/2012
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Sounds pretty brutal, if I recall correctly that dong wasn't anything to sneeze at.

Oh, silly us! What if stripping were an Olympic event? I've heard chatter about it in the past and can't say that I agree with it being added ... More
Vertical Bar??? Why not, it takes a tremendous amount of strength and I am sure many people would watch.

How about couples gymnastics. Couples would preform different acrobatics while keeping the PIV or PIA. Points for various moves could be added according to difficulty and subtracted for slipping out and early ejaculation. Bonus points could be added for simultaneous orgasm at the end of the routine.
08/08/2012
Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Vertical Bar??? Why not, it takes a tremendous amount of strength and I am sure many people would watch.

How about couples gymnastics. Couples would preform different acrobatics while keeping the PIV or PIA. Points for various moves could be ... More
I like the way you think, sir!
08/08/2012
junipersgame junipersgame
Penetrative leapfrog? lol
08/08/2012
ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
I like the way you think, sir!
08/08/2012
chickyto82 chickyto82
What about pole dancing acrobatics? Points for style, strength and creative ability. Or strip challenge? Couples pair up and one dances while the other watches and the couple who last the longest without signs of sexual arousal win.
08/08/2012
P'Gell P'Gell
Sex toy floor exercise. The athlete could choose two non powered and one powered device, at least two need to be used for either penetration or as a 'bater tube. He or she would do a floor exercise based on creative use of devices, athleticism, difficulty, number of penetrations (or uses of tubes) and the "dismount" would be a carefully planned orgasm.

This event would be presented in singles, doubles and teams.
08/08/2012
kbtoys kbtoys
Love the ideas of pole dancing and syncronized sex. There definitely needs to be something involving gymnastics. So many possibilities :-P
08/08/2012
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