Do you have any tips and tricks for beginners?

Billybob jr. Billybob jr.
Billybob jr.
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My girlfriend is coirious about anal what is the best way to start off?
11/19/2012
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Loriandhubby Loriandhubby
very slow, it is best to use a warm up toy like the small silk or a small butt plug. use lots of lube. good luck
11/19/2012
destruction13 destruction13
Quote:
Originally posted by Billybob jr.
My girlfriend is coirious about anal what is the best way to start off?
my first time i did it on my knees it made it easier to relax . started off slow to get the feel of it and the harder i got it the better it felt and less it hurt.
11/21/2012
destruction13 destruction13
Quote:
Originally posted by destruction13
my first time i did it on my knees it made it easier to relax . started off slow to get the feel of it and the harder i got it the better it felt and less it hurt.
oh yeah and lots of lube!!!
11/21/2012
ScottA ScottA
External stimulation. Use lube and both commit to keeping it outside. Starting with external stim allows the person being stimulated to focus on the feelings without worrying about "what's going to happen next." Combine it with genital stimulation for an even better time.

Once you've done this for a while and anal play is pleasurable you can move on to penetration play with a finger or small toy. If you want to move on to "full" penis-anal sex or full size dildo play then go very slowly until the bottom is ready to take it. It may take over a month - don't rush.
11/22/2012
Luca77 Luca77
Definitely start slow. Start with fingering with plenty of lube. Find a small toy to warm-up with/to if it suits your fancy. Communication is key!
11/23/2012
geliebt geliebt
Slow, and lots of lube first thing!

I like to use fingers to get ready for anal sex or a larger toy- just playing gently and adding another finger as it feels comfortable. Be very careful of ANY discomfort and be sure to be PATIENT and enjoy the process!
11/25/2012
Genderfree Genderfree
Quote:
Originally posted by geliebt
Slow, and lots of lube first thing!

I like to use fingers to get ready for anal sex or a larger toy- just playing gently and adding another finger as it feels comfortable. Be very careful of ANY discomfort and be sure to be PATIENT and enjoy ... More
For me what has really helped is during the day practicing with those muscles. A lot of people, especially Americans, do not have a lot of control over those muscles and has caused many health issues. Basically what I am saying is do kegels. Tense and relax. Doing that has helped me a lot. That way, when you get down to anal, you will be able to feel when is too soon.
11/26/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Billybob jr.
My girlfriend is coirious about anal what is the best way to start off?
Slow, slow, slow. Let her make the call on advance or stop. Forget the porn banging action (at least for a few years), and be gentle as can be. Fingers are a great start..and should be able to go in, pain free, long before a penis is even tried.

Once you go for penis insertion, realize you don't have to get in all the way on the first or second or even third time. The fact she is wanting to try is a huge gift. Use lots of lube...then use more. When you have used more, then start adding lots more. Oh...and some extra lube on top of that is a great idea.

Try different positions. If something does not feel comfortable, to her, stop. Try a different approach. Lots of folks here seem to swear by doggy style anal as their favorite. I have been an anal fanatic for decades and never, ever enjoyed doggy style anal. Maybe my build or shape..who knows. For me, missionary style or on my side is awesome fun.

Everyone is different and so go with what feels good to her.

Enjoy.
12/01/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Genderfree
For me what has really helped is during the day practicing with those muscles. A lot of people, especially Americans, do not have a lot of control over those muscles and has caused many health issues. Basically what I am saying is do kegels. Tense ... More
This is an interesting statement. "A lot of Americans don't have control over those muscles"? Is it different in other nations, some how? Is there some country, I don't know about, that starts Kegels in gym class for forth graders? What does nationality have to do with this? Just honestly curious.
12/01/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by geliebt
Slow, and lots of lube first thing!

I like to use fingers to get ready for anal sex or a larger toy- just playing gently and adding another finger as it feels comfortable. Be very careful of ANY discomfort and be sure to be PATIENT and enjoy ... More
Well said. Indeed..we fully agree.
12/01/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by Luca77
Definitely start slow. Start with fingering with plenty of lube. Find a small toy to warm-up with/to if it suits your fancy. Communication is key!
We think it goes beyond "communication&qu ot;. It needs to be "control". That meaning that whoever is the "receiver" of anal penetration, needs to be completely "calling the shots"...each and every time. No discussion about that "command and control" organizational hierarchy. in our book. It is the only way to "play safe, play fair and play fun" with anal.

If the receiver says "slow", that means slow. If they stay "stop" it means stop, and if they say "out" it does not mean..."but oh baby, I am about to cum" or any such argument. It means out...now.

Not to be harsh, but understanding that rule of control has made for a far more trusting and indeed active anal sex life for us both, and in prior relationships, it turned this gal into an anal sex lover.
12/01/2012
Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by destruction13
my first time i did it on my knees it made it easier to relax . started off slow to get the feel of it and the harder i got it the better it felt and less it hurt.
Funny you say that. That was the first position I tried it in too. It hurt. We stopped. I got on my side. We "spooned", and it worked...great. Thirty years later, and I still cannot do it doggy style. Hurts every time. I guess we are all very different.
12/01/2012
libbyv libbyv
Quote:
Originally posted by Billybob jr.
My girlfriend is coirious about anal what is the best way to start off?
slow, with lots of lube
12/01/2012
Chou Wang Chou Wang
I'd suggest to try out with lubed fingers and very small toys for the start. There are plenty of beginners kits on this site which have good feedback from the community. However I'm a bit pickier on the materials and would advise to start with smaller dildos and plugs. For example:

The Love Pacifier beginner is a good one. The best thing is to let it in while having vaginal sex. That way the pleasure is maximized and the muscles relax. So she wouldn't feel discomfort during penetration. Take it really slow and let her have control.

The other one that is good for "penetration training" is the Small silk dildo.
12/05/2012
lainebug lainebug
Relax take your time and enjoy.
12/06/2012
Total posts: 16
Unique posters: 11