Feminist who likes getting Choked?

femmeantichrist femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going against my morals? Is it wrong for a feminist to love being submissive in bed?
04/29/2013
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Gdom Gdom
Nothing wrong with that at all! My partner is pretty much the same way: thoroughly feminist, anti-patriarchy, anti-rape culture, and loves rough sex and BDSM (which is basically a combination of all my favorite things). Wanting hot, rough, and (most importantly) consensual sex doesn't make you any less of a feminist. In fact, knowing what you want and not being afraid of that is a crucial aspect of sexual empowerment
04/29/2013
Woman China Woman China
How would this make you less of a feminist?

Isn't one of the root ideals of feminism is about being able to make choices?

Most would consider me to be the most feminist woman they know (I laugh at that), yet I love to be used in the bedroom after I've had my way with foreplay. It doesn't make me any less who I am because of what I enjoy in the bedroom. I feel it adds to who I am that I am able to let go every once in a while.
04/29/2013
GONE! GONE!
What someone wants in bed isn't what they want in life and society. You're all fine.
04/29/2013
bratcat bratcat
Everyone's really hit the nail on the head with this one, and has given really good advice.
One of the root ideals of feminism are about choice, being free to make choice, and being given the opportunity to make choices. I know many who identify themselves as feminist and enjoy BDSM play and having sub/dom relationships where they are the sub -- myself included. So long as it's consensual and something YOU enjoy then there is no reason it would conflit with your morals/self-worth as a self identified feminist.
04/29/2013
kendra30752 kendra30752
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
Well, I don't think that is anything that should make you less of a feminist by any means. Just like there's nothing wrong with being a feminist, but sub in the bedroom. Not going against your morals at all. You like what you like. I am a feminist too and I don't ever think of the things I like during sex having anything to do with what makes me more of or less of a feminist. Likes are a separate thing, IMO. Nothing at all wrong with being submissive in bed. I am more on that side too in the bedroom sometimes, but not elsewhere. Lol. It's something that comes naturally (what you tend to be like during sex) so there's nothing about it that should make one feel badly or less moral or that it means they aren't as much of a feminist as any other feminist.

No worries.
04/29/2013
dancingduo dancingduo
Feminists doesn't mean you have to be dominate.
04/29/2013
Gary Gary
You like what you like. You have no control over that.
04/30/2013
karenm karenm
I'd say no. What you like in bed and what you believe don't have to be the same thing. You can't really control what you like.
04/30/2013
hyacinthgirl hyacinthgirl
What could be more feminist than having a relationship with a man where he has to trust and respect you completely in exchange for his sexual pleasure? I'm not "more feminist" than other kinky women because I'm a Dom - it's just what I am. And a proper Dom can't get their kink fix without the explicit trust of their sub, which they can't earn without displaying respect and caring for the health and well-being of their sub. It falls apart if there isn't a ton of mutual trust and respect.

Liking what you like and acknowledging it is a brave act. Never feel you have "betrayed" any ideal because of how you are, and if anyone tries to guilt you, punch them
04/30/2013
sunflower sunflower
I think it's more feminist to be confident with your sexuality and know what you like and dislike. It's being empowered. I see no conflict at all with liking an act and being feminist.
04/30/2013
Love Bites Love Bites
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
I don't see anything wrong with it.
It plays right along those lines- you are the one in power, granting your partner your trust of your body. You're in control, they have to have your consent to do those things.
05/02/2013
bog bog
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
If you're doing exactly what you want in life regardless of your gender or sex, that is feminism!
05/02/2013
snowminx snowminx
Feminists fight for the rights on the streets, not in the sheets.
05/02/2013
kadelette kadelette
Quote:
Originally posted by Woman China
How would this make you less of a feminist?

Isn't one of the root ideals of feminism is about being able to make choices?

Most would consider me to be the most feminist woman they know (I laugh at that), yet I love to be used in ... More
Exactly right!
05/02/2013
MattBryant MattBryant
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
hey if it's a choice you make, then there isn't anything anti feminist about it!
05/02/2013
TheirPet TheirPet
What's fun in the bedroom doesn't reflect on your ideals.
05/03/2013
llellsee llellsee
It's a sexual taste that either gender can enjoy being on the receiving end of and you just happen to be a woman. If anything, I'd say knowing what you like and not being afraid to ask for it fits in well with being a feminist
05/03/2013
femmeantichrist femmeantichrist
Thank you everyone! i don't know i guess it kind of made me feel inferior afterwards, but now that i hear all of your opinions and how they are all majorly pro feminism and all of your replies really helped me thank you again. (:
05/04/2013
Robespierrethecat Robespierrethecat
Yeah! You can definitely be a feminist and a sub!
05/05/2013
libbyv libbyv
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
not at all, if it's what you like, it's what you like, and you shouldn't feel badly about it
05/06/2013
CS2012 CS2012
Quote:
Originally posted by femmeantichrist
I'm a feminist woman, i'm all for equality and i believe that women are strong and independent creatures, yet for some reason there is nothing that drives me crazier then being dominated and treated roughly by a big tough man. Is that going ... More
I don't think it's wrong. I love it too there is nothing more thrilling than a strong man dominating me in bed. I recently experience being choked and having my hair pulled for the first time last week and LOVED it.
05/09/2013
KrissyNovacaine KrissyNovacaine
What happens in my bedroom has nothing to do with my feminism or my politics. I have heard the argument that if you are submissive then you can't be a feminist before, and I think it is bullshit. I fight for my rights to choose what I want. I just want an equal chance. What I do during sex should never factor in.
05/09/2013
Aishiteru Aishiteru
I don't think it's wrong.
05/12/2013
elli elli
No, I don't consider feminism and a kink for submission to conflict. I identify as a kinky feminist, and I don't think I'm any less of feminist when I'm subbing to my partner, or any more of a feminist when I'm domming.
05/12/2013
FieryRed FieryRed
Quote:
Originally posted by hyacinthgirl
What could be more feminist than having a relationship with a man where he has to trust and respect you completely in exchange for his sexual pleasure? I'm not "more feminist" than other kinky women because I'm a Dom - it's just ... More
Very well said! I second all of that.
05/15/2013
Total posts: 26
Unique posters: 25