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Climax Non-bursting Non-warming Lubricant

It didn't get warm, the little beads didn't burst, and it didn't work very well for lube either. I can't recommend this lube, as it didn't do what it was supposed to. Thankfully, it is pretty cheap.
Published:
Pros:
Cheap, looks pretty in the bottle
Cons:
Doesn't warm, doesn't burst, doesn't stay wet long
Rating by reviewer:
1
useful review
I am not sure exactly what I was thinking when I ordered this lube. Did I take reviews seriously when they said the little beads felt gritty? No, of course not. And do they feel gritty? Why yes, yes they do. They do not pop! To get them to break open, I actually have to smash them between my fingernails. After sex is over, I have to actually search for little red beads and pick them off of myself.

Maybe the little plastic feeling beads would be tolerable if this “warming lube|Climax bursts warming - Lubricant by Topco” actually got warm, but it doesn’t, so it isn’t. I swear I squirted a quarter of the bottle onto myself trying to get some sensation from it. Waiting didn’t do any good, blowing didn’t do any good, rubbing didn’t do any good unless I rubbed to hard and fast that I should have started a fire on my genitals, and then it was only slight heat from friction and nothing from the lube. I tried this on my husband, and his response was “maybe I sort of felt a slight warming sensation.”

So, the texture is horrid and it doesn’t warm, but what about using this as a lube? Well, I have never used an oil based lube|Lubricants Forum before, but KY works about as well as this stuff. I found it was greasy feeling, and oddly enough sticky too. It seemed to get kinda gummy and gross feeling after about 10 minutes or so. Sex would have been very uncomfortable if my natural lube hadn’t come through for me and wet the way.

I am wondering if this lube does anything for anyone. I don’t see anything in the ingredients that would make it do anything special.

Propylene glycol, Glyceryl polymethacrylate, PEG-8, Helianthus annuus (sunflower) seed oil, Tocopheryl acetate, Retinyl palmitate, Agar, Red 30

I am not an expert, but I don’t understand exactly what would make this lube get warm? Maybe this is why it didn’t get warm; perhaps they just forgot an ingredient?
Follow-up commentary
I have almost convinced myself to try this lube a couple times, but in the end I always remember those first couple attempts and decide against it. I finally tossed the bottle in the trash. If nothing else, it being there was taking up room that could be used by lubes I don't hate. A warming lube|Sliquid sizzle that I do like is the Sliquid Sizzle, although it can become pretty intense if too much is used. It is good, but not perfect. I am still on a quest to find the perfect warming lube, and I will continue to search until I've tried everything available, or else I find one that really is perfect.
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Comments
  • Dame Demi
    Dame Demi  
    I almost tried this recently.  Thanks for taking one for the team on this!
  • Bulma
    Bulma  
    Ha ha, you're welcome.  I'm not sure what I am going to do with the rest of the bottle.  I doubt it will ever get used.  Garbage bound?  Maybe this stuff works better for someone else, if so, I'd like to hear from them.
  • Oggins
    Oggins  
    Whew!  Glad I read your review!  It's coming out of my wish list!  I could easily put sand in my crotch myself! 
  • Bulma
    Bulma  
    Ha ha, it would probably feel better too
  • CookieMonster
    CookieMonster  
    All this talk of sandy crotches sure shot this one down :p
  • Epiphora
    Epiphora  
    Oh man. Picking the beads off sounds like hell.

    I also used to be intruiged by the idea of tihs lube. No more!
  • Bulma
    Bulma  
    I was really disappointed by the beads, I was really hoping they would burst like they are supposed to, because it really is a cool idea.
  • Jimbo Jones
    Jimbo Jones  
    Sand in the crotch always reminds me of the Simpsons when Homer and Marge are kissing on the beach and Homer says "I've got sand in my underpants" and Marge says "me too, let's go home" and then Homer scoops more sand into his pants before he leaves. It's funny on a cartoon, not so much fun in real life. Thanks for the warning, Bulma!
  • Bulma
    Bulma  
    Ha, I actually haven't seen that one.  And you're welcome for the warning! Unless of course someone actually likes that kind of thing
  • ThePornLibrarian
    ThePornLibrarian  
    Thanks for the honest review. Are there any warming lubes you can recommend?
  • Bulma
    Bulma  
    I just tried the Sliquid Sizzle, and so far I think I like it the best for a warming lube of what I have tried. I have tried other arousal lubes that I liked like the Pure Passion and the Tasty Twist, but they had more than just the warming sensation. I have others in my wish list that I'd like to try, but so far the Sliquid Sizzle is what I reach for when I want something warming.
  • Valyn
    Valyn  
    heh.. I just read your review, and I gotta agree! I got one of these recently as a part of a care package thing, and it's just a little awkward. A few times I've had to pick off beads too!
  • Darby'sPet
    Darby'sPet  
    Sounds like a definite mood killer!
  • Viktor Vysheslav Malkin
    Viktor Vysheslav Malkin  
    Nice review, shame this lube wasn't very good.
  • thedude
    thedude  
    i almost just bought this, almost
  • SexyStuff
    SexyStuff  
    Oh thanks for the info
  • phunkyphreak
    phunkyphreak  
    Thanks for the review
  • cheesewizz
    cheesewizz  
    nice review
  • Various
    Various  
    Thanks for the review. I'll be steering clear. Sand crotch is not my bag.
  • Cat E.
    Cat Enderly  
    Thanks for reviewing.
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