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Someone Call the Fire Department!

All in all this was a mixed bag—the massage was nice, but the minute things went down south, I thought I'd have to call the fire department! OUCH!
Published:
Pros:
Good massage fluid, variety of flavors, inexpensive.
Cons:
Can cause irritation, heavily scented, slightly sticky.
Rating by reviewer:
2
useful review
Wet's Heating Massage Lotion is what taught me that I really dislike "warming" lubricants. It also taught me that I dislike flavored and scented lubricants. I was younger and the boyfriend I had at the time brought over a bottle of the Wet watermelon flavored stuff and was sort of excited to try it out.

He gave me a back massage and, to be honest, for that the heating aspect was not bad. It felt sorta tingly and nice—so I won't say anything really bad about that, except that I totally smelled like fake watermelon candy (and this stuff is scented STRONGLY) and felt slightly sticky afterwards. But no real complaints.

He put a tiny bit on my lady parts and went down on me, though, and then...oh god. No. It felt like my pussy was on fire. The more oral he did, the more it spread, and the more it hurt—eventually, we had to stop. I regained my composure and we continued—and even a while later, once things got wet and wild down there again, the lube reactivated itself! Ow, ow, ow!

The ingredients are: Glycerin, Water (Aqua), Flavor, Ascorbic Acid (Vitamin C), Citric Acid, Sodium Benzoate, Sodium Dehydrocetate, Aspartame, Potassium Sorbate, FD & C Color. A+ for being paraben-free, but I'm just too chemically sensitive for this stuff.

The former boyfriend reported that he used it for masturbation from then on and that he enjoyed it greatly, so it really is a mixed bag.

As long as you can stand highly-scented products, this is a fun massage fluid—the warming sensation really did feel nice on my aching muscles (I was working as a waitress at the time) but the minute it went down south—nooo. I'll look elsewhere for purpose-specific massage oils with this warming characteristic in the future.

And now I know—no scented, flavored, warming, cooling or otherwise non-inert lubricants will touch my delicate bits. But I've always got to learn the hard way!
Follow-up commentary
Recently I was enticed to use this for the purpose of giving my partner a hand job. We've tried other warming lubes and had a little vial of this that had been given as a gift. It was uninspiring - too sticky to really give a good slippery hand job and the sweet smell was overpowering. We had to wash up quite well after, as it was very sticky once it'd dried. No real improvement, I still don't like it much.
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My Wet heating massage lotion tags
  • Who / How / What
    [ ? ]
    Who might this product be best for? How is it best used? What are the best circumstances or situations for using this product?
    • Couples
    • Massage
    • Masturbation
  • Where
    [ ? ]
    Where / what types of places can this product be used?
    • Bedroom / on a bed
  • Body / part areas
    [ ? ]
    What areas on the body can this product be used / what areas does it stimulate best?
    • Back
This review was edited by
  • Sir Sir
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  • Edited reviews: 435
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Comments
  • petname
    petname  
    For most people it sounds like it works better as a massage oil than a lubricant.
  • Entropy
    Entropy  
    Nice review, sorry this didn't work out for you.
  • megan1987
    megan1987  
    thanks!
  • chantalgiardina
    chantalgiardina  
    thanks for the great review!
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